Pix That Make You LOL-Warning-SNWS

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DaGambler

Well-Known Member
you’ll never not see art as incredible as this

5 artists who have somehow produced the smallest art you’ll struggle to see…

1. willard wigan (website)




using a hair plucked from a dead fly as a brush, birmingham willard wigan paints miniscule sculptures he has carved from grains of rice and sugar. each ‘brushstroke’ is applied between heartbeats and he has said that the pulse in one of his fingers can ruin his work.
below is the titanic on a pin.



earlier this year a 70-piece collection he sold was insured by the new owner for £11.2million.

2. jin yin hua (website)




the slim photo above is of a 1/2 inch strand of black human hair. on it has been painted the portraits of 42 u.s. presidents. the top portrait can be seen below - click on it for a larger version which is magnified x 1′000′000.



the artist, jin yin hua from china, has painstakingly created over 100 micro-paintings and carvings during the past 10 years.

3. ee jin teo



to ee jin teo, a piece of micro-art on a grain of rice must seem cumbersome. he decided to go a few steps further and created what he calls ‘quantum art’ by reproducing william blake’s ‘ancient of days’ out of nanocrystals (really really small stuff). ‘this photoluminescent version of Blake’s painting was created in porous silicon by focused helium beam writing and subsequent electrochemical etching in hydrofluoric acid’. by the way, 1µm is 1′000th of a millimetre.

4. mykola syadristy (website)



unbelievably, the tube in which the rose above is contained is actually a hollowed out human hair, also polished inside and out. the diameter of the rose itself is a hefty 0.05mm. below is another piece by the ukrainian. the gold mosquito sculpture is life-size.



5. eduard ghazaryan


85 year old ghazaryan is a micro-sculptor with over 600 pieces to his name, one being the world’s smallest working violin (above). the body of the 7mm violin is sculpted from gold, the fiddle from a hair, and it actually works. when challenged by conductor ohan duryan, eduard responded by playing aram khachaturyan’s ‘dance’ with duryan’s orchestra. the violin in the piece below, seen in a needle’s eye, is even smaller and carved from a golden powder granule.


CHESMEN

The fines chess set the world over. The chessboard and chessmen are placed on a pinhead. Thez show an arrangement of chessmen from one of the games played between Alexander Aliokhin (black pieces) and Raul Capablanka. The chessmen are made of gold.
The size is enlarged.


CAMELCADE

The author made the whole composition of gold and placed it in the needle eye .

The size is enlarged.
 
"SICC"

"SICC"

Well-Known Member
robert 14617 said:
WARNING : ONLY Read This WHEN You Are Able To



LAUGH OUT LOUD.

 I went to Home Depot recently while not being altogether sure that course of action was a wise one. You see, the previous evening I had prepared and consumed a massive quantity of my patented 'you're definitely going to shit yourself' road-kill chili. Tasty stuff, although hot to the point of being painful, which comes with a written guarantee from me that if you eat it, the next day both of your butt cheeks WILL fall off.

Here's the thing. I had awakened that morning, and even after two cups of coffee (and all of you know what I mean) nothing happened. No 'Watson's Movement. Despite the chilies swimming their way through my intestinal tract, I was unable to create the usual morning symphony referred to by my dear wife as 'thunder and lightning'.

Knowing that a time of reckoning HAD to come, yet not sure of just when, I bravely set off for Home Depot, my quest being paint and supplies to refinish the deck. Upon entering the store at first all seemed normal. I selected a cart and began pushing it about dropping items in for purchase. It wasn't until I was at the opposite end of the store from the toilets that the pain hit me.

Oh, don't look at me like you don't know what I'm talking about. I'm referring to that 'Uh Oh, Shit, gotta go' pain that always seems to hit us at the wrong time. The thing is, this pain was different. The chilies from the night before were staging a revolt. In a mad rush for freedom they bullied their way through the small intestines, forcing their way into the large intestines, and before I could take one step in the direction of the toilets which would bring sweet relief, it happened. The chilies fired a warning shot.

There I stood, alone in the paint and stain section, suddenly enveloped in a toxic cloud the likes of which has never before been recorded. I was afraid to move for fear that more of this vile odor might escape me. Slowly, oh so slowly, the pressure seemed to leave the lower part of my body, and I began to move up the aisle and out of it, just as an orange aproned clerk turned the corner and asked if I needed any help.

I don't know what made me do it, but I stopped to see what his reaction would be to the toxic non-visible fog that refused to dissipate.. Have you ever been torn in two different directions emotionally? Here's what I mean, and I'm sure some of you at least will be able to relate. I could've warned that poor clerk, but didn't. I simply watched as he walked into an invisible, and apparently indestructible, wall of odor so terrible that all he could do before gathering his senses and running, was to stand there blinking and waving his arms about his head as though trying to ward off angry bees. This, of course, made me feel terrible, but then made me laugh.. .......BIG mistake!!!!!

Here's the thing. When you laugh, it's hard to keep things 'clamped down', if you know what I mean. With each new guffaw an explosive issue burst forth from my nether region. Some were so loud and echoing that I was later told a few folks in other aisles had ducked, fearing that someone was robbing the store and firing off a shotgun. Suddenly things were no longer funny. 'It' was coming, and I raced off through the store towards the toilet, laying down a cloud the whole way, praying that I'd make it before the grand explosion took place.
Luck was on my side. Just in the nick of time I got to the john, began the inevitable 'Oh my God', floating above the toilet seat because my ass is burning SO BAD, purging. One poor fellow walked in while I was in the middle of what is the true meaning of 'Shock and Awe'.. He made a gagging sound, and disgustedly said, 'Son-of-a-bitch!, did it smell that bad when you ate it?', then quickly left.

Once finished and I left the restroom, reacquired my partially filled cart intending to carry on with my shopping when a store employee approached me and said, 'Sir, you might want to step outside for a few minutes. It appears some prankster set off a stink bomb in the store. The manager is going to run the vent fans on high for a minute or two which ought to take care of the problem.'

My smirking of course set me off again, causing residual gases to escape me. The employee took one sniff, jumped back pulling his aprom up to cover his nose and, pointing at me in an accusing manner shouted, 'IT'S YOU!', then ran off returning moments later with the manager. I was unceremoniously escorted from the premises and asked none too kindly not to return.

Home again without my supplies, I realized that there was nothing to eat but leftover chili, so I consumed two more bowls. The next day I went to shop at Lowe's. I can't say anymore about that because we are in court over the whole matter. Bastards claim they're going to have to repaint the store.
Click to expand...

that was the funniest thing i have read in long time :clap:
 
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