korvette1977
Well-Known Member
If a married man has a girlfriend she is his mistress
What if a married woman had a boyfriend .. what would he be called ..?
What if a married woman had a boyfriend .. what would he be called ..?
BIGGEST THREAD in RIU History
- Thread starter Garden Knowm
- Start date
Chiceh
Global Mod, Stoner Chic
BigGuyTok'n
Well-Known Member
LMFAO...... wait.......OK.......*more laughing while getting a visual*.....wait....OK, I think that would look hilarious
MicroGro
Well-Known Member
A mom is cleaning the kitchen one day when her son Lil Johnny comes running down the stairs saying "Mommy! Mommy! I saw grandma's shrimp! I saw grandma's shrimp!"
The mom thinks to herself, "That's silly. Lil Johnny must be makin up stories again. I'll set him straight."
So she says to Lil Johnny, "Lil Johnny, your grandma does not have any shrimp in this house or anywhere else."
Lil Johnny says, "Yes she does Mommy! I can show you!"
Lil Johnny grabs his Mommy's hand and drags her up to Grandma's room. As they get near the door Mommy can see that Grandma's narcolepsy must have kicked in again after she got out of the shower. Grandma is spread eagle, naked, asleep on her bed.
"See Mommy right there," Lil Johnny says pointing to Grandma's clitorous.
Mommy says, "That's not a shrimp Lil Johnny, that called a clitorous."
Lil Johnny says, "Really? It sure tastes like shrimp."
Shrimp tacos anyone??
The mom thinks to herself, "That's silly. Lil Johnny must be makin up stories again. I'll set him straight."
So she says to Lil Johnny, "Lil Johnny, your grandma does not have any shrimp in this house or anywhere else."
Lil Johnny says, "Yes she does Mommy! I can show you!"
Lil Johnny grabs his Mommy's hand and drags her up to Grandma's room. As they get near the door Mommy can see that Grandma's narcolepsy must have kicked in again after she got out of the shower. Grandma is spread eagle, naked, asleep on her bed.
"See Mommy right there," Lil Johnny says pointing to Grandma's clitorous.
Mommy says, "That's not a shrimp Lil Johnny, that called a clitorous."
Lil Johnny says, "Really? It sure tastes like shrimp."
Shrimp tacos anyone?? 
storm22
Well-Known Member
A mom is cleaning the kitchen one day when her son Lil Johnny comes running down the stairs saying "Mommy! Mommy! I saw grandma's shrimp! I saw grandma's shrimp!"
The mom thinks to herself, "That's silly. Lil Johnny must be makin up stories again. I'll set him straight."
So she says to Lil Johnny, "Lil Johnny, your grandma does not have any shrimp in this house or anywhere else."
Lil Johnny says, "Yes she does Mommy! I can show you!"
Lil Johnny grabs his Mommy's hand and drags her up to Grandma's room. As they get near the door Mommy can see that Grandma's narcolepsy must have kicked in again after she got out of the shower. Grandma is spread eagle, naked, asleep on her bed.
"See Mommy right there," Lil Johnny says pointing to Grandma's clitorous.
Mommy says, "That's not a shrimp Lil Johnny, that called a clitorous."
Lil Johnny says, "Really? It sure tastes like shrimp."
.......... thats epic
BigGuyTok'n
Well-Known Member
Sick and FUNNY, I like it !A mom is cleaning the kitchen one day when her son Lil Johnny comes running down the stairs saying "Mommy! Mommy! I saw grandma's shrimp! I saw grandma's shrimp!"
The mom thinks to herself, "That's silly. Lil Johnny must be makin up stories again. I'll set him straight."
So she says to Lil Johnny, "Lil Johnny, your grandma does not have any shrimp in this house or anywhere else."
Lil Johnny says, "Yes she does Mommy! I can show you!"
Lil Johnny grabs his Mommy's hand and drags her up to Grandma's room. As they get near the door Mommy can see that Grandma's narcolepsy must have kicked in again after she got out of the shower. Grandma is spread eagle, naked, asleep on her bed.
"See Mommy right there," Lil Johnny says pointing to Grandma's clitorous.
Mommy says, "That's not a shrimp Lil Johnny, that called a clitorous."
Lil Johnny says, "Really? It sure tastes like shrimp."
BigGuyTok'n
Well-Known Member
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]SPERM BANK ROBBERY[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]A man wearing a ski mask bursts into a sperm bank with a shot gun. "Open the f*****g safe!" he yells at the girl behind the counter. "But we're not a real bank" replies the girl. "This is a sperm bank, we don't hold money". "Don't argue just open the safe or I'll blow your f*****g head off!" She obliges and opens the safe door.[/FONT][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]"[/FONT][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Take one of the bottles and drink it!"[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]"But it's full of sperm" the girl replies nervously.[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]"Don't argue, just drink it" he says. She prises off the cap and gulps it down.[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]"Take out another one and drink it too!" he demands. The girl drinks another one. Suddenly the guy pulls off the ski mask and to the girl's amazement it's her husband.......[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]"Not that f*****g difficult is it?" he says[/FONT]
majim420
Well-Known Member
HHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA thats some funny shit
We TaRdED
Well-Known Member
i just had a spam sandwich!!!! 
good shit... anyone want to know how to make your pickles more sour? like the ones you get at the deli.......
this is what you do, you take your pickles and drain out about half the water or more, than fill the rest with white vinigar!!!! mmmmmm
i also added salt, a little crushed red pepper, and dill... great shit!!!!
you have to wait about two days before it gets real sour, but its well wort it!!!!!
sour pickles are the bomb!!!!
good shit... anyone want to know how to make your pickles more sour? like the ones you get at the deli.......this is what you do, you take your pickles and drain out about half the water or more, than fill the rest with white vinigar!!!! mmmmmm
i also added salt, a little crushed red pepper, and dill... great shit!!!!
you have to wait about two days before it gets real sour, but its well wort it!!!!!
sour pickles are the bomb!!!!
We TaRdED
Well-Known Member
why? you made some great sour pickles?
ohh and btw, the more vinegar you add the more sour it will become!!!! i like them real sour........
JohnnyBravo
Well-Known Member
Ummm....This one time at band camp
#1accordfamily
Well-Known Member
your def space monkey material
Wikidbchofthewst
Well-Known Member
what's so good about goodbye?
Purplecheeser
Well-Known Member
this is kind of like the "Flammable Jello' thread from caraudio.com. I think its around 3,000 pages.
