Stoney McFried
Well-Known Member
Guys hate to hear about women farting. Let's do a dutch oven on the next guy who walks in!
Attn ALL Female Members of RIU
- Thread starter Wikidbchofthewst
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Seamaiden
Well-Known Member
That guy had better be Zeke. Where's he been, anyway? Gotta love a guy who loves all women, ya know?
smartbadguy
Well-Known Member
all u guys need to get laid...........
Florida Girl
Well-Known Member
Ok.. this may be kinda gross, it tripped me out, but... (sucks it up)
Ok, I had a boyfriend who wanted me to queef when we were having sex. He said he liked how it felt on his schwatz. How weird is that?
The other day I had gas so bad my legs were flapping like wind socks in a hurricane!
I'm laughing so hard the tears are streaming!!!! My peeps!!!LMAO! Ok, that shit made me laugh out loud, literally.
ROFL... women for ages have been laughing at men who think they are the masters at grossing out their friends with their stories.... but the TRUTH is... there is NO WAY ON EARTH you men can even compete with us women when it comes to the sharing the DETAILS of things you don't even want to know about. We women are in a league of our own!
Seamaiden
Well-Known Member
Wikidbchofthewst
Well-Known Member
I used to make money doing that. Or...trade for buds.i need a back rub. i did three straight days of physical labor and my back is spasming. i'm on my 3rd Soma. i should just go to bed but it's only 9pm. ladies? anyone? please.
ONLY at that time?
That's no bueno...*high five for the bj's comment*
I love them both. My best friend's mom looks like Stevie Nicks..
I had to rep you back there, because you've been cracking me up tonight woman!
smartbadguy
Well-Known Member
well if anyone need some lovin call me at 1-800-all-nite 5.99 per hr ( need to pay my power bill)
Stoney McFried
Well-Known Member
Hmm...dutch oven! Now...make me speak swahili!
Stoney McFried
Well-Known Member
I'm never gonna catch up on rep with you...I better spread more love!
I used to make money doing that. Or...trade for buds.
ONLY at that time?
*high five for the bj's comment*
I love them both. My best friend's mom looks like Stevie Nicks..
I had to rep you back there, because you've been cracking me up tonight woman!
Florida Girl
Well-Known Member
ROFL!!!! Dutch Oven!!!! I absolutely LOVE fart humor. Nothing funnier... it's natural... and just damn funny! I don't find farts offensive at all....the smell yes.. offensive.. but it can't be helped so why not laugh about it.... .. hey ... it's normal!!!!
The first time I went to Hawaii with an ex I had never eaten Hawaiian food before and we went to a luau .... OH LORD that food didn't like me!!!! My man banished me to the balcony to get that bad air out... I was laughing so hard I couldn't breathe..... as I came back in the room (still laughing) he said to me "don't drag that shit in with you"..... I laughed even harder.
I knew it was over when we went back to Hawaii 3 more times and he tried to control what I ate! He had NO HUMOR in him... and it's not like HIS farts didn't peel the wallpaper too! At least I was a good sport about it!
Wikidbchofthewst
Well-Known Member
*pulls Seamaiden's finger*
Florida Girl
Well-Known Member
Hey, pull my finger.
***gives a tug*** Let `er rip!!!!
Pookiedough
Well-Known Member
I farted in the grocery line yesterday but in my defense the lady behind me was much too close anyway,I was just taking back my personal space wouldn't have been so bad but it wall all bark and no bite.
Twistyman
Well-Known Member
I farted in the grocery line yesterday but in my defense the lady behind me was much too close anyway,I was just taking back my personal space wouldn't have been so bad but it wall all bark and no bite.
HotNSexyMILF
Well-Known Member
LOL.... there used to be A LOT LESS women on here... numbers have increased dramatically tho... Women only account for like 5% of marijuana busts tho, or something like that.. it's a really low number.. so 1.) less women smoke 2.) less women are getting caught.. lol... I'm typically not a big fan of women (much too catty and over reactive for the most part) I'm thinking that if we got more of these women smoking the world could be a more pleasant place..LOL... plus when they do smoke they can teach all those boys out there how to not get caught.. LOL..
Florida Girl
Well-Known Member
I farted in the grocery line yesterday but in my defense the lady behind me was much too close anyway,I was just taking back my personal space wouldn't have been so bad but it wall all bark and no bite.
ROFL.... when farting in a grocery store (or anywhere in public while alone) the trick is to NEVER do it around a child. See if you let an SBD go around an adult... they won't say anything... they'll just move away quickly. Now a child, on the other hand, will CALL YOU OUT ON IT! Yep.... right there in public... they will loudly proclaim "Mommy... that lady farted!!!"..... ask me how I know...
Yep... always best to have a man or dog with you that you can blame it on
ROFL.... when farting in a grocery store (or anywhere in public while alone) the trick is to NEVER do it around a child. See if you let an SBD go around an adult... they won't say anything... they'll just move away quickly. Now a child, on the other hand, will CALL YOU OUT ON IT! Yep.... right there in public... they will loudly proclaim "Mommy... that lady farted!!!"..... ask me how I know...
Yep... always best to have a man or dog with you that you can blame it on
you just made my day brighter. thank you.
HotNSexyMILF
Well-Known Member
LMFAO... children AND men.. You haven't gotten the "AWWW MANN that was a good one. Who the hell farted?" in the middle of the grocery store? LOL..ROFL.... when farting in a grocery store (or anywhere in public while alone) the trick is to NEVER do it around a child. See if you let an SBD go around an adult... they won't say anything... they'll just move away quickly. Now a child, on the other hand, will CALL YOU OUT ON IT! Yep.... right there in public... they will loudly proclaim "Mommy... that lady farted!!!"..... ask me how I know...
Yep... always best to have a man or dog with you that you can blame it on
Twistyman
Well-Known Member
Thanks..(from all men)..(and dogs) ....Called out, you bet...I was at a big family dinner and my gf & myself went upstairs for "quite time"....little did we know what was lurking under the bed.........needless to say.....called out was the least of it....ROFL.... when farting in a grocery store (or anywhere in public while alone) the trick is to NEVER do it around a child. See if you let an SBD go around an adult... they won't say anything... they'll just move away quickly. Now a child, on the other hand, will CALL YOU OUT ON IT! Yep.... right there in public... they will loudly proclaim "Mommy... that lady farted!!!"..... ask me how I know...
Yep... always best to have a man or dog with you that you can blame it on
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