Your choice, most likely the longer you wait the more seeds will develop. If your plant hermied it would have balls also. I would be wondering where the pollen came from if it doesent.
Looking good. Dropping when lights are off is completely normal. I would be prepared to switch to 12/12 soon.
Looks like I grow in same size pots and have learned the hard way I cant veg very large plants hoping my flowering stage will go good.
Its hard to tell because pics are blurry but I think you are getting confused with the calxys. They grow everywhere! and possibly do turn into seed pods if pollen is present.
http://forum.grasscity.com/photopost/showphoto.php?photo=65316&title=calyx&cat=500
Its hard to say but it might be stretching, called foxtalling from a result of to much heat. Or, it didn't get enough nutrients at some point of time in the grow. I have had a few grows like this and it was result of to much heat. Bump up the nutes before its to late.
I don't grow much in pots, only for clones and outdoors but I'm sure you could poke holes into your pot, if possible, and that will increase airflow & evaporation in the medium. Don't go overboard with it though.
Make sure you have proper ventilation and adequate air turbulence. More air movement will increase evaporation from medium but can decrease humidity in grow room.