Do you let the Mormons in when they stop by?

A couple of Mormons stopped by last night, spreading the word. First thing they asked was, "How has Jesus affected you?"

I stated "He hasn't done anything for me".

Spoke with the guys for 15 minutes or so. Telling them how religion is brain washing. Asked them why they believe... etc.


Do you guys take the time to have conversations with this group?

Nope. I just say I'm a witch, runs them right off.

Sometimes they send some hot girls, but no I never really talk with them. I think soon I may start to though just to fuck with the church and make their jobs harder.

A couple stopped by my house a week ago too. First thing they asked was "Do you need answers to questions like 'Why do we suffer?'" and tried to give me a book about it. Then after I rejected their religion they tried to sell me a book on discrimination...

They usually truly believe they need to help us...

How did the conversation with them go?

no i don't let them in cus usually i got weed and bongs out, but usually i go out on the porch and humor them as i find religion a big joke. i'm on a first name basis with the jahovis witnesses that stop by most saturdays hahaha

communistcannabis said:

no i don't let them in cus usually i got weed and bongs out, but usually i go out on the porch and humor them as i find religion a big joke. i'm on a first name basis with the jahovis witnesses that stop by most saturdays hahaha

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LOL.

I do. The first thing I ask them is what they are going to name their plane (they get to go to their own planet like Jesus owns this one... but he hangs out on the planet Kolob). I mean... they have to have been thinking about it since they were children... I open with that. Then I ask about Kolob. Then I bring up thetans, which is scientology, but it is a fun way to lump them in with the people they see as crazies in a polite way. If they stick through that, then we can argue the bible.


Unless I have something I need to do... in which case I dismiss them and suggest that they are wasting not only their time but others as well... and suggesting that a 17 yr old brainwashed boy is going to explain metaphysics to me by proxy of Jesus in the role of the Silver Surfer is funny.



and to the earlier poster... they don't send girls. You are thinking of the Witnesses.

No but my brother does...He talks them to death until they are begging to leave.

hell naw i slam the door in there face.

i remember i wuz so hi i gave them the address to my cuzins house and two days later they showed up

i told him i did that the same day he didnt believe me and the day they got there he called me all pissed cuz they talked to him for 30 min cuz he dont have balls to be mean like me hahahahHAH

HahahaHAaha dude i just ask em what they think about murder and ask them to take a look in my extra large freezer but they usually try leaving when they see it hahahah but some stick around and i just scare the shit outa them like show em knives and i just act fukin psyco with em hahah

Suffering???? BAA HA HA HA LOL LOL! Arent you supposed to ask Buddhists about suffering? The Almighty suffers. Its like the blind leading the blind.

I always talk with them, when it comes to meeting people I like to refer to the ideas of Thoreau in Walden

ill go to your church if you come to mine first.(i have no church sunday is a day of relaxation...bed bound all day...)

I treat them the same way..... But the other day I had "one" stop by my house and he wasn't young ..he was old like late 70's old.... And a funny thing happened (at least for a vocal atheist like myself) I couldn't tell him off..He had his stupid little book there in his old wrinkly hand telling me about all the wonderful things that he thinks will happen when we die like no pain and how you get to see all your family again And I felt so bad I couldn't tell him everything he believed his whole life was bullshit made up fairy tales... so sadly I just nodded took his pamphlet and the poor old fella went on his way.....I still feel sad for him

ReggaeGanja said:

HahahaHAaha dude i just ask em what they think about murder and ask them to take a look in my extra large freezer but they usually try leaving when they see it hahahah but some stick around and i just scare the shit outa them like show em knives and i just act fukin psyco with em hahah

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I seriously lol'd.
+rep

Bauks said:

I treat them the same way..... But the other day I had "one" stop by my house and he wasn't young ..he was old like late 70's old.... And a funny thing happened (at least for a vocal atheist like myself) I couldn't tell him off..He had his stupid little book there in his old wrinkly hand telling me about all the wonderful things that he thinks will happen when we die like no pain and how you get to see all your family again And I felt so bad I couldn't tell him everything he believed his whole life was bullshit made up fairy tales... so sadly I just nodded took his pamphlet and the poor old fella went on his way.....I still feel sad for him

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Aww thats so sad.
meh, i'm not atheist but wouldn't it be cool if there was an afterlife? Fuck it. I'm going to live forever.

fuk yea were all living forever if we can reachlight speed in sum sort of vehicle

Nope. I don't have time too.

My religion takes up too much time.


And it's called,


SEX,DRUGS AND ROCK N'ROLL

Aww, I hope he does find his heaven.

Bauks said:

I treat them the same way..... But the other day I had "one" stop by my house and he wasn't young ..he was old like late 70's old.... And a funny thing happened (at least for a vocal atheist like myself) I couldn't tell him off..He had his stupid little book there in his old wrinkly hand telling me about all the wonderful things that he thinks will happen when we die like no pain and how you get to see all your family again And I felt so bad I couldn't tell him everything he believed his whole life was bullshit made up fairy tales... so sadly I just nodded took his pamphlet and the poor old fella went on his way.....I still feel sad for him

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I've found the best way to deal with them is to answer the door in your boxers, but make sure you're "peeking" out the front.

Act like you don't have any idea you're swinging free and be real enthusiastic about talking with them right there at the door.


The couple Mormon guys that ride all around here on their bicycles knocking on doors won't even turn down my block anymore.


See, a lot of the most fervent Mormons are homosexual. There's a lot to it, but their church is worse than the Catholics when it comes to the whole "naughty elders touching people" thing but they're a hell of a lot better at covering it up. Probably because they're smaller and way more indoctrinated.

Anyway, it's a major, major no-no to be gay in the Mormon church and they believe big-time in the whole "ex-gay" BS. So the few gay guys that they've got preach and pray extra hard to try to make themselves more straight.

Even better, the Mormon church keeps tabs on them, watching them like hawks, and they just love to "train" them by sticking them with another guy they know is straight and sending him out to knock on doors and such.


So you answer the door with a swinging cock and you've got a really good chance that one of the meat-gazers is really hating that he doesn't hate the view, and the other is trying to figure out whether the first one is still gay... it's hilarious.

The straight guy doesn't want anything to do with you, and the gay one can't risk sprouting wood in front of the straight one.

They won't come back.

i got so fed up with them coming to my door one day i got butt naked grabed a raw chicken out the fridge and lit some incents and sat there with the door wide open when they came up the steps i started speaking in toungs rocking back and forth they looked at me then at eachother then turned around and walked away never seen em sence