Idiot of the day award goes to.......me :(

Well, I am a complete idiot. Today I had to go into work early for a conference call. I woke up groggy and just grabbed the first pair of clean pants on the hanger and a work shirt. So here I am at work and look down and there is a hole about the size of a quarter right where my crotch is? WTF? I remember these pants were getting worn out and I gave them to the wife and asked her to throw them away. FUCK, looks like she washed them and put them right back on the hanger.

So now the dee-da-dee moment: I am wearing some bright red boxers and I when speaking to customers, it was showing through. I already tried leaving my shirt untucked but nothing. So my pants are a high gloss black and I get the bright idea to use a permanent marker and color my boxers black in that area for a quick fix. So I color in the red and think everything is cool. It has been about an hour and I have to take a piss.....

THE FUCKING INK LEAKED THROUGH AND MY DICK IS COLORED BLACK IN SPOTS!!!!

Yep, fan-fucking-tastic. Anybody know how long permanent marker takes to come off the skin? I am not going to be scrubbing my manhood with any chemicals or anything either! Fuck my life today....

Oh man, I don't care who ya are, that's funny right there! As for how long it takes I'd say no more than 2 days with good showering!

*claps* I agree with the judges on this one he really deserved to win this award
this has got to be the funniest way a guys dick can turn black

permanent marker makes your weiner shrink too. Did you know?

Should have used a blue marker then you would have blue balls.

rkm said:

Should have used a blue marker then you would have blue balls.

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Hahahah. You bastid

Rsixxer said:

Hahahah. You bastid

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I could not resist. Was it a sharpie?

color your whole dick black so it matchs the spots.. and if you dont mind me saying i think your wife would like that too

Reminds me of that Family Guy where Peter says "I'm a black guy" when he and Lois are getting it on.

Njsurf14 said:

color your whole dick black so it matchs the spots.. and if you dont mind me saying i think your wife would like that too

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hhahahaha your wifes gunna be like WTF? hahahahha
maybe it will make it look bigger...

Just scrub. + rep for the laugh.

I can hear it now "I TOLD YOU ITS NOT AN STD ITS PERMANENT MARKER!"

I say screw coloring it all black,
put some blue and some green in there too or her favorite color, mix it up a bit she'll like that lol

haha or she'll be like,
dont put that nasty dirty thing in me!

Would a permanent marker cause a permanent yeast infection?

Stoney McFried said:

Would a permanent marker cause a permanent yeast infection?

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haha that would be unfortunate....

Just remember, it will be hard to see your dick in the dark!!!!

Budsworth said:

Just remember, it will be hard to see your dick in the dark!!!!

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He could dip it in liquid tide and turn the black lights on.

Damn guys, it's like you are all thinking of new ways to make my cock fall off! Lol

Rsixxer said:

Damn guys, it's like you are all thinking of new ways to make my cock fall off! Lol

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Its always funny when it happens to someone else.

If you ever listen to the stand up comedy of Nick Swardson (Terry on Reno911) in one of his bit he says o yeah i'm guna get a tatoo on my penis that says "My other dick is black" its sooo funny