ok follow stoners, today is friday, and i just got the worst news possible, i falied my last drug test for my PO after not smoking for about 33 days. HE wants me to come take another urine test on tuesday 6-2-09. I have been smoking everyday for about 45 days now. I need to pass the test to avoid jail time. Please help. Please list any products you had success with and has worked.
Need help passing urine test for po!!!
- Thread starter yb1981
- Start date
gangjababy
Well-Known Member
Stop starting multiple posts, you fucked up and now deal with it...
pastafarian81
Well-Known Member
you wet your bed now you have to lay in it.
sorry, but i stopped for smoking for 2 years while dealing with legal issues, that way i didn't end up in your situation.
sorry, but i stopped for smoking for 2 years while dealing with legal issues, that way i didn't end up in your situation.
bongrippinbob
Well-Known Member
Most likely you're screwed. When I was on probation, there was mirror and everything pointing at your junk while you went.
For a job I taped a small shampoo container to my stuff filled with clean urine. Then I just used that to go into the cup. But with probation or parole, you can't really do that.
For a job I taped a small shampoo container to my stuff filled with clean urine. Then I just used that to go into the cup. But with probation or parole, you can't really do that.
WeedIsForMe
Active Member
Get some sythentic piss and some hand warmers...ur lookin at about 150$ but you'll def pass! It comes in a bag and has a little tube that you just dangle out next to your dick which is cool because theres ussually some fag watching you. The container has little pouches for hand warmers so they cant tell its not fresh. The other option is a Strip Detox and some multis to load before your test. Def the cheaper way to go but only about 60% effective. http://www.gnc.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2134259
You can get them at any GNC, just don't tell them you're trying to pass a drug test or they cant legally sell it to you and I assure you THEY WONT. No one wants to lose their job to help out some stoner. Make sure you drink plenty of water with it...by the gallon...you should be pissing clear. Carb load on top of it all...eat whole wheat pastas and keep drinking water...you should weigh about 5 pound more than wen u started...lol. Good Luck.
You can get them at any GNC, just don't tell them you're trying to pass a drug test or they cant legally sell it to you and I assure you THEY WONT. No one wants to lose their job to help out some stoner. Make sure you drink plenty of water with it...by the gallon...you should be pissing clear. Carb load on top of it all...eat whole wheat pastas and keep drinking water...you should weigh about 5 pound more than wen u started...lol. Good Luck.
bongrippinbob
Well-Known Member
A gallon of water weighs 8 pounds, so if he's drinking water by the gallon, he's going to weigh much more than 5 pounds more.
Just be careful not to drink too much water. You can die from it!
Just be careful not to drink too much water. You can die from it!
So what happened to you? Was the test for PO? how much water did u drink before the?
bongrippinbob
Well-Known Member
They can't "fail" you for diluted urine. They can make you come back and test again, but they can't fail you for it. There is no law against drinking a lot water and there is no way you can get into trouble for it.
WeedIsForMe
Active Member
If you drink 2 gallons of water you will hafta piss like a motha fucker b4 the 2nd ones even done so u never really add more than 5 pounds to your total body weight...also when u drink those strip detox drinks and eat plenty of carbs it keeps sugars and nutrients in the urine so you have less of a chance of having your urine being too diluted. Also I wrote that you should take multi vitamins but i didnt emphasize the importance of it...Time release multi vitamins will keep nutrients running through you even if you are pissing constantly. Basically the carbs keep you from overhydrating and help to obsorb some toxins, the water is a flush for the liver and kidneys as is the detox drink. Spend the money and go with the synthetic tho its 100% every time...
bongrippinbob
Well-Known Member
THC is not water soluble, its fat/alcohol soluble. How would the carbs absorb toxins?
And just a tip, it took me 55 days to get clean when I was on probation. If you are a heavy smoker, it takes a lot longer than the 30days that people tell you.
And just a tip, it took me 55 days to get clean when I was on probation. If you are a heavy smoker, it takes a lot longer than the 30days that people tell you.
tdiddy
Well-Known Member
THC is stored in fat. The longer you smoke and the less active you are, the longer it takes to get it out of your system. I would start exercising heavily and drinking LOTS of water every day until then but don't do it the day before or the day of or it will make it even worse. Then do the detox thing. Basically, though, you pretty much have zero chance of passing with your own urine due to how frequently you smoke. You could try drinking a shit ton of water and doing the detox the day of and maybe have the test thrown out bc of dilution(they will be able to tell), then exercise, drink water and don't smoke and maybe they'll give you one more shot another test later that you'll be ready for.
HE GOT IT ON THE MONEY BUT IF YOU USE THE detox ABOUT 1 OR TWO HR BEFOR THE TEST YOU'LL BE GOOD JUST PISS TWO TME'S BEFOR YOU HIT THE CUP.
mjmaupin
Well-Known Member
uhm, well hate to correct you but...
i was busted for a DUI. had to go to a counselor who tested me right on the spot. i failed obviously.
i said that there was no way, didn't smoke, all the bullshit that she just laughed at me about.
i was told to retest in one week.
i drank probably a gallon and a half the morning of. i waddled in with a water baby in my belly.
i peed in the cup and it looked like tapwater.
they tested it and were unable to get a "reading" on the sample. what that means is that it was so diluted they couldn't even pick up the trace minerals and other shit that's supposed to be in your piss.
that was considered a FAILED DRUG TEST. not because it was positive for anything, but because it was negative for everything.
luckilly, i was facing 10 days locked up at the city jail but the judge and i had the same alma mater so he just said "be smart in the future" and gave me 8 weeks of weekly sessions with a counselor and x2/wk AA meetings (because it all stemed from a DUI).....and not to diminish the utter stupidity of driving drunk, which i DO NOT do now, EVER. Buuuut, i was pulled over for a busted tail light, not for speeding, swerving or anything like that. the cop was just a total piece of shit dickwad, and it was labor day night, which didn't help anything.
but i digress.
cool luck bro. my advice is just be appologetic with the PO and judge and ask for forgiveness and a second chance. offer to give a truely clean sample in 30 days and don't dick around with it...don't smoke until this is behind you. jail is no bueno.
mjmaupin
Well-Known Member
and a comment on synthetic or other stuff.
if you get caught with that/using that you WILL go to jail. the PO and Judge will consider you completly fucking with them. at that point you're going from the urinal to handcuffs to a jumpsuit.
i don't know your PO or why you've got one to begin with. but it if's small potatoes stuff and you don't have any big history then just being honest and APPOLOGETIC might be a good idea. say you're really stressed and anxious about something(s) and that pot helps you in that way. ask if they'll send you to a SA counselor instead of jail and emphasis that you'll take it very seriously....and you can prove it to them by giving a clean sample in 30-40 days.
the exercise is a good idea too, but for all of us. me included.
good luck.
if you get caught with that/using that you WILL go to jail. the PO and Judge will consider you completly fucking with them. at that point you're going from the urinal to handcuffs to a jumpsuit.
i don't know your PO or why you've got one to begin with. but it if's small potatoes stuff and you don't have any big history then just being honest and APPOLOGETIC might be a good idea. say you're really stressed and anxious about something(s) and that pot helps you in that way. ask if they'll send you to a SA counselor instead of jail and emphasis that you'll take it very seriously....and you can prove it to them by giving a clean sample in 30-40 days.
the exercise is a good idea too, but for all of us. me included.
good luck.
I smoked every day for over a year about stopped for about 16 days if that and I passed my test.
Basically the gist of any "test clear" type of idea or product is just alot of fluid. Even half the get clear products that cost 40 at headshops still tell you to drink alot of water. Id just get some vitamins and drink alot of water. I heard some of the berry juices (cranberry and such) work better since its actually got antioxidants and other chemicals in it but I profess I doubt anyone knows how true any of this is and it can vary day to day and person to person.
When you cant smoke its time to grow it and either make some money to buy some for yourself later or store it up.
Basically the gist of any "test clear" type of idea or product is just alot of fluid. Even half the get clear products that cost 40 at headshops still tell you to drink alot of water. Id just get some vitamins and drink alot of water. I heard some of the berry juices (cranberry and such) work better since its actually got antioxidants and other chemicals in it but I profess I doubt anyone knows how true any of this is and it can vary day to day and person to person.
When you cant smoke its time to grow it and either make some money to buy some for yourself later or store it up.
chickenphish
Well-Known Member
tell em its against your religion to give any waste from your body to a unknown source and that if they wantto test it test in front of u then u should have not have smoked in a few days and u should drink lots of water and vinegar or pickle juice and i mean drink LOTS the kits is not as effictive as the test where they sent it off. and u should squeek by if nothing else it will buy u time. AND STOP SMOKIN WHILE UR ON P.O CMON NOW U KNOW THEY TEST IF U WANT TO SMOKE U SHOULD HAVE TOOK UR TIME U WOULD HAVE BEEN DONE BY NOW PROBL. AND U COULD SMOKE FREE AND CLEAR good luck and when in doubt bring up religion it always gets me out of a jam
I cant stress this enough, nobodys for certain on anything in life, but they may help you. (Dont believe 100% of what you read is what im saying/ Especially when its on a website that sells you something.)
Heres some info I saw on the site today From SeamoreGanja420:
Home Remedies and Other Myths
There are several home remedies that people have been attempting in order to
pass drug tests for several years. The main problem is that as the drug tests
become more technologically advanced and as more methods of drug testing are
designed, home remedies are becoming less reliable. Here are a few of the
most popular home remedies and why they don’t work.
Washing Your System with Water
Washing your system by drinking large quantities of water about 4 to 6 hours
prior to a drug test has been recommended in emergency situations. There are
dangers behind drinking too much water including water intoxication, which leads
to another condition called hypnoatremia. This is a condition in which causes the
body to lose electrolytes dilutes the sodium in the body.
From the cellular level, you are essentially drowning yourself. Electrolyte
imbalances and the swelling of tissues can cause an irregular heartbeat, allow
fluid to enter the lungs and may cause the eyelids to flutter. Swelling can also
put pressure on the brain and nerves, which can cause seizures, coma and
ultimately death.
In the case of drinking enough water to pass a drug test, you may actually do
yourself more harm in testing because your urine is lightly to be heavily diluted.
This is abnormal and many tests will recognize that an unusual amount of water
was consumed prior to the test.
If you drink so much water that your urine looks diluted, the testing company may
assume that you have diluted your urine and you may fail the test because of
this.
Drinking Vinegar
Many believe that drinking vinegar and water together will flush your system, but
this is only a myth. Vinegar will lower the pH of urine and Amphetamines may be
excreted three times faster when your urine is acidic. Vinegar may reduce
detection time, but you are still likely to be detected. Vinegar will also cause
diarrhea, which can also cause dehydration. You will need to drink plenty of
water if you use the vinegar option.
Visit Drug Test Friend. com or call us at 1-252-216-0196 for more information
Covering a Diluted Urine Sample
If you have been drinking large quantities of water, you may find that your urine is
diluted. A diluted sample can cause you more problems because you may be
accused of tampering with your sample. There are two other options that people
have tried to cover a diluted sample.
1. Creatinine Level
Visit Drug Test Friend. com or call us at 1-252-216-0196 for more information
a. Eating red meat will boost your creatinine levels and it has been
suggested that if you eat a large amount of red meat for about three
days before your drug test, you can cover a diluted sample
because the creatinine levels will be normal.
2. Vitamin B or Vitamin C
a. By taking 50 to 100 milligrams of vitamin B or vitamin C, you may
be able to color your urine sample yellow. Time-release vitamins
may pose a problem if you are attempting this method.
There are several problems with these strategies. The main problem is that
diluted samples are tested for specific gravity and creatinine levels that are below
normal or above normal. If you eat too much red meat, you may end up hurting
your test even more. If you only take the vitamins, you may have yellow urine,
but they will still test as diluted samples. If you take too much vitamin B or C,
these unnecessary levels will be excreted through your urine and many drugtesting
companies are testing for abnormal levels of vitamins.
Diuretics
Diuretics will cause you to urinate frequently. There are several diuretics that
you may consume on a regular basis including:
· Coffee
· Cranberry Juice
· Beer
· Iced Tea
· Herbal Tea’
· Pepsi
· Grapes
Visit Drug Test Friend. com or call us at 1-252-216-0196 for more information
If you are consuming enough of a diuretic to flush your system, you may find that
you will become seriously dehydrated. Diuretics can cause you to lose vital fluids
and electrolytes and may even cause kidney damage from frequent urination.
Electrolyte imbalances are also a dangerous effect that can cause heart, kidney
and liver problems. Many kidney and liver problems will also cause you to have
a false positive drug test for the majority of recreational drugs. If your
electrolytes are imbalanced, you are at risk for heart failure or sudden death.
Using Someone Else’s Sample
First of all, you will need to be able to get the sample into the testing room. It is
commonplace for the tester to be in the room with men and possibly women if
they are suspicious.
Second of all, you will need to know every substance, medication, food, etc. that
the person has consumed within the last 24 to 48 hours and possibly the last
month or longer and you will have to keep the sample between 91 to 97 degrees.
Remedies such as Contac and Alka-Seltzer have caused many tests to come up
as a false positive, which is why you will need to know everything that your friend
has consumed.
There are so many problems with this. Many testing facilities are requiring that
people remove all of their clothing and wear a gown while they supply a sample.
People have tried to use a vial or other receptacle taped to the inside of their
thigh to get around the gown and the temperature requirement. This is very
dangerous to try, especially if someone is watching you! If you get caught
tampering with your sample, you will automatically fail the drug test and then you
will have to deal with the consequences associated with the drug test that you
were taking. If the tester requires another sample, they may require a certain
amount of urine to test and if you are not able to supply enough, you may fail the
test as well.
Several other herbs have also been tested, but a test that was done in 1995 on
50 herbs in Germany, showed that all 50 herbs failed. Many herbal teas have
also been suggested for use, but most only dilute your urine and may cause you
to fail the test due to diluted urine.
Ammonia
Two ounces of ammonia will alter the sample and cause a negative test,
however, you must be able to get the ammonia into the testing facility and the
smell of ammonia is easily recognized.
Lemon Juice
Lemon juice is a plain and simple myth. Adding lemon juice will do nothing to the
sample except maybe alter the pH somewhat.
Liquid Soap
Liquid soap will make your sample appear cloudy and may cause suspicion.
Soap will make the test comeback negative, however, you may have to have
your own soap, as many testing centers are shutting off sinks, not supplying soap
or having the sink outside of the testing area.
Urine from Other Animals
Many desperate people have used the urine from dogs and even hamsters and
substituted it for their own. With strict rules being enforced at many testing sites,
it may be difficult to sneak in the sample and you may be under supervision.
This is dangerous and the sample may not pass the temperature, pH or
creatinine tests.
DRUG TEST FRIEND CHEAT SHEET
Alcohol
· Urine Test: 12-24 hours
Amphetamines
· Saliva Test: 3 days
· Urine Test: 1-4 days
· Hair Test: Up to 90 days
Barbiturates
· Urine Test: 1-21 days
Benzodiazepines
· Urine Test: 1-42 days
Cannabis
· Single Use
1. Blood Test: 2-3 days
2. Saliva Test: 12-24
hours
3. Urine Test: 2-3 days
4. Hair Test: Up to 90
days
· Habitual Use
1. Blood Test: 2 weeks
2. Saliva Test: 12-24
hours
3. Urine Test: Up to 12
weeks
4. Hair Test: Up to 90
days
Cocaine
· Saliva Test: 1 day
· Urine Test: 4-5 days
· Hair Test: Up to 90 days
Codeine/Morphine
· Saliva Test: 12-36 hours
· Urine Test: 2-4 days
· Hair Test: Up to 90 days
Heroin
· Urine Test: 2-4 days
· Hair Test: Up to 90 days
Methamphetamines
· Blood Test: 1-3 days
· Urine Test: 3-5 days
· Hair Test: Up to 90 days
PCP
· Blood Test: 1-3 days
· Saliva Test: 3 days
· Urine Test: 3-7 days
· Hair Test: Up to 90 days
Heres some info I saw on the site today From SeamoreGanja420:
Home Remedies and Other Myths
There are several home remedies that people have been attempting in order to
pass drug tests for several years. The main problem is that as the drug tests
become more technologically advanced and as more methods of drug testing are
designed, home remedies are becoming less reliable. Here are a few of the
most popular home remedies and why they don’t work.
Washing Your System with Water
Washing your system by drinking large quantities of water about 4 to 6 hours
prior to a drug test has been recommended in emergency situations. There are
dangers behind drinking too much water including water intoxication, which leads
to another condition called hypnoatremia. This is a condition in which causes the
body to lose electrolytes dilutes the sodium in the body.
From the cellular level, you are essentially drowning yourself. Electrolyte
imbalances and the swelling of tissues can cause an irregular heartbeat, allow
fluid to enter the lungs and may cause the eyelids to flutter. Swelling can also
put pressure on the brain and nerves, which can cause seizures, coma and
ultimately death.
In the case of drinking enough water to pass a drug test, you may actually do
yourself more harm in testing because your urine is lightly to be heavily diluted.
This is abnormal and many tests will recognize that an unusual amount of water
was consumed prior to the test.
If you drink so much water that your urine looks diluted, the testing company may
assume that you have diluted your urine and you may fail the test because of
this.
Drinking Vinegar
Many believe that drinking vinegar and water together will flush your system, but
this is only a myth. Vinegar will lower the pH of urine and Amphetamines may be
excreted three times faster when your urine is acidic. Vinegar may reduce
detection time, but you are still likely to be detected. Vinegar will also cause
diarrhea, which can also cause dehydration. You will need to drink plenty of
water if you use the vinegar option.
Visit Drug Test Friend. com or call us at 1-252-216-0196 for more information
Covering a Diluted Urine Sample
If you have been drinking large quantities of water, you may find that your urine is
diluted. A diluted sample can cause you more problems because you may be
accused of tampering with your sample. There are two other options that people
have tried to cover a diluted sample.
1. Creatinine Level
Visit Drug Test Friend. com or call us at 1-252-216-0196 for more information
a. Eating red meat will boost your creatinine levels and it has been
suggested that if you eat a large amount of red meat for about three
days before your drug test, you can cover a diluted sample
because the creatinine levels will be normal.
2. Vitamin B or Vitamin C
a. By taking 50 to 100 milligrams of vitamin B or vitamin C, you may
be able to color your urine sample yellow. Time-release vitamins
may pose a problem if you are attempting this method.
There are several problems with these strategies. The main problem is that
diluted samples are tested for specific gravity and creatinine levels that are below
normal or above normal. If you eat too much red meat, you may end up hurting
your test even more. If you only take the vitamins, you may have yellow urine,
but they will still test as diluted samples. If you take too much vitamin B or C,
these unnecessary levels will be excreted through your urine and many drugtesting
companies are testing for abnormal levels of vitamins.
Diuretics
Diuretics will cause you to urinate frequently. There are several diuretics that
you may consume on a regular basis including:
· Coffee
· Cranberry Juice
· Beer
· Iced Tea
· Herbal Tea’
· Pepsi
· Grapes
Visit Drug Test Friend. com or call us at 1-252-216-0196 for more information
If you are consuming enough of a diuretic to flush your system, you may find that
you will become seriously dehydrated. Diuretics can cause you to lose vital fluids
and electrolytes and may even cause kidney damage from frequent urination.
Electrolyte imbalances are also a dangerous effect that can cause heart, kidney
and liver problems. Many kidney and liver problems will also cause you to have
a false positive drug test for the majority of recreational drugs. If your
electrolytes are imbalanced, you are at risk for heart failure or sudden death.
Using Someone Else’s Sample
First of all, you will need to be able to get the sample into the testing room. It is
commonplace for the tester to be in the room with men and possibly women if
they are suspicious.
Second of all, you will need to know every substance, medication, food, etc. that
the person has consumed within the last 24 to 48 hours and possibly the last
month or longer and you will have to keep the sample between 91 to 97 degrees.
Remedies such as Contac and Alka-Seltzer have caused many tests to come up
as a false positive, which is why you will need to know everything that your friend
has consumed.
There are so many problems with this. Many testing facilities are requiring that
people remove all of their clothing and wear a gown while they supply a sample.
People have tried to use a vial or other receptacle taped to the inside of their
thigh to get around the gown and the temperature requirement. This is very
dangerous to try, especially if someone is watching you! If you get caught
tampering with your sample, you will automatically fail the drug test and then you
will have to deal with the consequences associated with the drug test that you
were taking. If the tester requires another sample, they may require a certain
amount of urine to test and if you are not able to supply enough, you may fail the
test as well.
Several other herbs have also been tested, but a test that was done in 1995 on
50 herbs in Germany, showed that all 50 herbs failed. Many herbal teas have
also been suggested for use, but most only dilute your urine and may cause you
to fail the test due to diluted urine.
Ammonia
Two ounces of ammonia will alter the sample and cause a negative test,
however, you must be able to get the ammonia into the testing facility and the
smell of ammonia is easily recognized.
Lemon Juice
Lemon juice is a plain and simple myth. Adding lemon juice will do nothing to the
sample except maybe alter the pH somewhat.
Liquid Soap
Liquid soap will make your sample appear cloudy and may cause suspicion.
Soap will make the test comeback negative, however, you may have to have
your own soap, as many testing centers are shutting off sinks, not supplying soap
or having the sink outside of the testing area.
Urine from Other Animals
Many desperate people have used the urine from dogs and even hamsters and
substituted it for their own. With strict rules being enforced at many testing sites,
it may be difficult to sneak in the sample and you may be under supervision.
This is dangerous and the sample may not pass the temperature, pH or
creatinine tests.
DRUG TEST FRIEND CHEAT SHEET
Alcohol
· Urine Test: 12-24 hours
Amphetamines
· Saliva Test: 3 days
· Urine Test: 1-4 days
· Hair Test: Up to 90 days
Barbiturates
· Urine Test: 1-21 days
Benzodiazepines
· Urine Test: 1-42 days
Cannabis
· Single Use
1. Blood Test: 2-3 days
2. Saliva Test: 12-24
hours
3. Urine Test: 2-3 days
4. Hair Test: Up to 90
days
· Habitual Use
1. Blood Test: 2 weeks
2. Saliva Test: 12-24
hours
3. Urine Test: Up to 12
weeks
4. Hair Test: Up to 90
days
Cocaine
· Saliva Test: 1 day
· Urine Test: 4-5 days
· Hair Test: Up to 90 days
Codeine/Morphine
· Saliva Test: 12-36 hours
· Urine Test: 2-4 days
· Hair Test: Up to 90 days
Heroin
· Urine Test: 2-4 days
· Hair Test: Up to 90 days
Methamphetamines
· Blood Test: 1-3 days
· Urine Test: 3-5 days
· Hair Test: Up to 90 days
PCP
· Blood Test: 1-3 days
· Saliva Test: 3 days
· Urine Test: 3-7 days
· Hair Test: Up to 90 days
idamannotchu
Well-Known Member
I go to walmart; Buy Certo Fruit Pectin.
Its a gelatin and taste horrible, its in the baking supplies, take one whole pouch with a 20z water, and after that 2 more 20z; then piss a few times, and after the third one you should be pissing clean for arounf 4-6 hours depending on your body mass
Its a gelatin and taste horrible, its in the baking supplies, take one whole pouch with a 20z water, and after that 2 more 20z; then piss a few times, and after the third one you should be pissing clean for arounf 4-6 hours depending on your body mass
doktordoris
Active Member
All the kits to help you cheat are crap, and I certainly wouldn't trust any advice given on here about taking stuff to help you pass.
Just get some urine from a straight person, make sure it is the correct temp when you hand it over. Do that by keeping it in an armpit or your groin, buy a handwarming heat pack., or if you go to a bathroom to provide your sample use the hot tap to warm the urine. Make sure it isnt too warm, the people taking these tests aren't stupid.
And what the hell has passing drug tests got to do with growing dope?
A mod should do something about it.
Just get some urine from a straight person, make sure it is the correct temp when you hand it over. Do that by keeping it in an armpit or your groin, buy a handwarming heat pack., or if you go to a bathroom to provide your sample use the hot tap to warm the urine. Make sure it isnt too warm, the people taking these tests aren't stupid.
And what the hell has passing drug tests got to do with growing dope?
A mod should do something about it.