Strange short stories and/or facts

Milovan

Well-Known Member
Anyone have any weird short stories and/or facts to share?
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I'll start with this one guy that got a pea stuck up
his nose as a kid and it finally came out 50 years later
so can you imagine what the pea looked like after all that
time up his nose.

Also

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Get this,
2011 a man in California raped a Chihuahua and went to prison for
doing that.

Did you know..

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This Lisa girl was trippin big time!

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Anyone ever notice..

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Milovan

Well-Known Member
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In grade school the teacher would not let me
go to the bathroom so I shit my pants in class lol. sidesplit.gif

Some of you might remember this..


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Us blazing on acid, I found a girls undie in a scum puddle and my buddy was in a lip lock with his girl so I snuck
up behind him and stretched the undies over his head and pulled them all the way down past his ears and
he then ripped them off his head and started chasing me although it was hard for me to run laughing so hard. sidesplit.gif

Btw, did you know...

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This is a trip.
Never knew this!

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qwizoking

Well-Known Member
Your hands shrivel, get "pruny" as a nervous response. Several of my fingers and toes don't get pruny anymore.. I have lots of nerve damage


My middle school principle may have been inappropriate with a student. Was found tied in his kitchen and house burned down..there wasn't an investigation.. Hmm

I have a chihuahua x pit bull, quite an ugly dog. No pic, yiur imagination will have to suffice
BTW the male was the chihuahua
 

KLITE

Well-Known Member
In grade school the teacher would not let me
go to the bathroom so I shit my pants lol.
Ye i did that too but i was like 8 already i think. Basically my primary school was an old monastery for nuns, i mean it was like a 400 year old building. There were tales of rats coming out of the toilets and the like,m the bathrooms were in a dark corner o a basmeent, it was fucking scary man. So one day i had to take a shit and i just refused to go to the bathroom, i literally thought shitting myself would be less disgusting thgan using the 400 year old bathrooms man. It prolly was.
 

Milovan

Well-Known Member
Ye i did that too but i was like 8 already i think. Basically my primary school was an old monastery for nuns, i mean it was like a 400 year old building. There were tales of rats coming out of the toilets and the like,m the bathrooms were in a dark corner o a basmeent, it was fucking scary man. So one day i had to take a shit and i just refused to go to the bathroom, i literally thought shitting myself would be less disgusting thgan using the 400 year old bathrooms man. It prolly was.
That's really a cool story and
I could see a movie made..no kiddin'!
 

Milovan

Well-Known Member
Trip on this, a good buddy sitting in his pick up truck was parked in front of my house
as I was leaning in the passenger side window a bit when he lit a bowl with a match and a spark
from the match flew into a big box of fireworks he had sitting on the passenger seat then
all the sudden there were 3' flames coming out the top of his cab so I ran for the hose.
Needless to say the inside of his truck cab was completely scorched and black as charcoal but the
truck still ran so he drove it around like that for the next few months at least. I rode in it
and it smelled very awful. I can't believe he drove around like that for months lol.

Did you know..

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This one is tough to swallow..
Wtf!?


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Pretty cool and a trip!

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Milovan

Well-Known Member
Funny short story,
long ago, me and an idiot friend of mine in the past (Kurt) was over
another friends house (Rick's) and when Kurt wasn't looking Rick grabbed
a few crispy dry upside down dead for months cockroaches and stuffed them into
a bong bowl sprinled a little pot on top and gave it to Kurt to smoke and Kurt took
the hit blew out this huge white cloud of cockroach smoke then realized it tasted awful grabbed a hammer and went at Rick with it till Rick
whipped out a gun and stopped Kurt dead in his tracks by just showing the gun.
Rick and I had a good laugh.

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Pretty cool fact..

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I had no idea..

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Here is a fun fact!

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Nevaeh420

Well-Known Member
I wrote a short story, but I am not sure if I can fit it in one post, because it might be over the 10,000 character limit.

But, I will try. I will be right back.

~PEACE~
 

KLITE

Well-Known Member
Lol Once in Oslo at some Mcdonalds some short employee was trying to put up a poster, i helped her, she was quite shocked i was helping her. I was starving my tits off and got copious amounts of burgers, like prolly 15 or 20 euros worth of those things. Or maybe it was Burger King? Anyways They didnt fucking charge me.
Another curious eating story was in holland. oh my god ill never forget they had these fucking kebabs made inside a fucking margheritta pizza. I was ripped out my cunt, not eaten aaaall day i erradicated 4 kebabs in one sitting and the guy didnt let me pay, he was turkish he said id never seen anyone eat more than 2.
Another time like just after moving to the uk i, taking out some cash from cash point and some weird fella really quickly approaches me and i thought hes robbing me, turns out he was begging for money like RIGHT on top of you at cash point i got scared with the quickness and punched him to the floor. All of a sudden aaaaaaaaaall the shop owners are outside praising me and shit, one says i can have a kebab for free at his place. He was a really annoying dickhead always bothering people for money, after that day he stopped too.
 

Nevaeh420

Well-Known Member
My next discourse is a short story about a hypothetical scenario, when Christ George Manuel Oliveira is the King of the worlds, and the one world online government reigns.

It is the distant future, when everyone is a lot richer, because Christ has taught the masses His ways. Even the poorest people are making $1,000 a month, plus $500 worth of food stams per month, and the poorest people also have free apartments. The global online government dictated that every adult should get a $1,000 allowence (per month), plus $500 worth of food stamps per month; and anyone that makes less then $30 grand a year gets free housing. The crime rates are basically non existant, because everyone has their needs met, and Christ has taught people to love each other.

So there is an average working class family that has an underground abode, plus many other abodes. Most people love living underground because there are no mosquitoes or other bugs that bite you. People that live underground can always go to the surface any time they want, but they like living underground because its a controlled enviornment.

Many generations ago, Christ George gave the people the notion to live in all of the places that seemed impossible to live, because no one has ever lived there before. People found out that they can live in pyramid cities, inside of mountain cities, underground cities, floating on top of the ocean cities, underwater cities- inside the ocean cities, under the ocean floor cities, and cities in outer space. Many people in the middle class own an abode in all of these said locations.

So, an average middle class family is having a party to celebrate the prosperity that Christ has bestowed on the earth. Its Christ George Manuel Oliveiras birthday, and the whole world is having a party. Christ George died many AGEs ago, but Christ George is still remembered because of the world he imagined and created, through The_Word He spoke. Most people still adore Christ George, because Christ first loved the world, before His prophecies were accepted as the "God-Spell".

So one of the families are having a big party, but all of the families are having a big party, because its the Saviors birthday. This particular family lives about 1,000 feet underground, because the deeper underground you go, the cheaper the abodes become. This family owns many acres of land underground, like the average working class citizen does. Its always a pleasent temperture underground, because it is very insulated, and its easy to adjust the temperatures underground. This family owns a sauna and a steam room, because most families do. Also, most families own hot tubes and pools that are in their underground abode.

This family owns a 20 floor abode. Each floor is 10 feet tall. This family actually has an elevator, so they don't need to take the stairs. Some of the floors are dedicated towards farming, farming for plants and animals. All of their farms are 100% organic, because in the distant past, Christ Georges global online government passed a law that only organic fertilizers and nutrients can be sold. You will not find any chemical nutrients and fertilizers in the Kingdom of Christ, and the people all agree that organic is much better for the enviornment and their bodies.

One of their 20 floors are dedicated towards farming animals like cows, chickens, rabbits, ducks, pigs, goats, sheep, and any animal that they want. All of these animals have plenty of room and they roam freely. One of their 20 floors is dedicated towards growing plants for all of their animals. The animals always have more then enough food, and their bellies are always full. The animal farms are lit up by super bright LEDs, like most underground farms. Actually the vegetable farms are lit up by super bright LEDs too.

This family also owns an underground island, like most working class citizens do. This island is divided in half by a shallow fresh water sea, and the other half of the island is a salt water sea. Their island has many fruit trees. Their neighbors island is actually divided into quarters, fresh water, salt water, fresh water, salt water. But this family is content with their island being split in half with half of their island being fresh water, and the other half of their island being salt water.

The good thing about the salt water is that these people get to eat all of the salt water animals like the fish, lobsters, crabs, shellfish, and whatnot. The good thing about the fresh water is that they can water all of their farms, they have water for drinking, and they have fresh water to take showers in, plus their animals need to drink too. Whether it is the fresh water, or the salt water, its all organic and crystal clear, perfect for life. Sometimes this family likes to go scuba diving in the fresh water, and sometimes they like to go scuba diving in the salt water.

In the distant future, most people go scuba diving on a daily basis, because the water is everywhere. Now, people use "rebreathers", because thats all they sell at scuba diving shops. A "rebreather" is a scuba diving piece of equipment that takes out the CO2, and recirculates the oxygen back around, so you can go scuba diving all day on one little scuba tank. Everyone loves their rebreather. Technology has really reduced the price of rebreathers.

Since Christ came up with the notion to plumb the whole world with fresh water and salt water, the global online government dictated to implement Christ Georges notion. There are gigantic tunnels that connect all of the fresh water seas together, and all of the salt water seas are connected to the ocean, so all of the sea creatures can travel anywhere. Some scuba divers actually ride the current in these underground tunnels, and they can travel miles in one day by just riding the current. There are plenty of animals is these tunnels too. And every tunnel has a bridge on top, with fresh air, so even if you run out of oxygen in your scuba tank, you can walk on top of the water on an air bridge.

So, this family is having a glorious party. There is going to be organic wine, organic beer, organic filet mignon steaks, organic tuna fish, organic vegetables, organic cheese, organic lobsters, and many other foods. Most families now a days has their own personal gyms, so people can stay in shape. Most people are only eating organic food, and they get paid to stay heathy by their health insurance company, so they usually spend a few hours at their personal gym because they have more free time.

A grandfather and his grandson just caught some tuna fish, using a technique called "underwater fishing". Underwater fishing is like fishing but you're scuba diving and you see when the fish bites your bait, and you watch the fish the whole time, as you reel it in. These people will make sushi out of this tuna, for the party. They just need to collect a little more seaweed for the sushi. You can catch fish that weigh over 100 pounds while "underwater fishing", its actually an olympic sport in the future.

People still have smartphones in the future, but the smartphones are a lot smarter. Some people have actually implanted their smartphone into their head, but this is not recommended. It takes only a few seconds to charge up your smartphone in the future, you just need to add liquid hydrogen: but some smartphones have "super capacitors". This family is teaching their 4 year old how to use a smartphone. This family has 10 children, about the average size family in the future. Every child has their own 30 feet by 30 feet room, with screens on their walls and ceilings to watch TV, play on the internet, or whatever. I mean that their whole wall and ceiling are a screen to watch, LED screens are everywhere. But, if they want, this family owns their own movie theater to watch, and play on the internet; its a 40 feet wide and 20 feet tall wide screen.

There are endless miles of water tunnels, connecting all of the seas. People travel through these enormous tunnels with their SPACE JETS, underwater. If the SPACE JET didn't have GPS, it would be very easy to get lost in all of these undet***er tunnels. The SPACE JETS always know the quickest and most efficient way to go though. There are so many underwater tunnels, usually there isn't much traffic.

This family actually has an underwater club house for their children. Their children can watch all of the fish and sea life. Basically, its a big clear help plastic dome, underwater. This family has an underwater club house for the fresh water, and one for the salt water. The parents get to teach their children all of the different names of the sea creatures, its very educational for the children; they always learn a lot.

Sometimes the children like to switch from scuba diving from the fresh water to the salt water: all they need to do is climb a hemp ladder and switch it up, since half of their island is fresh water, and the other half is salt water. This family has fish farms in both sides of their island, fresh water fish farms, and salt water fish farms. This family never needs to go to the grocery store, they are self sufficient, and they are healthy.

Since Christ George made electricity free, because He built enough nuclear power plants, no one has any utility bills. People can save their money for more important things, besides utility bills. And since Christ George plumbed water all around every country, water has been free for ages too.

But the moral of the story is that everyone had a good time at the party, the Saviors birthday was celebrated. Everyone ate enough, and the adults got a little drunk too. All of the children enjoyed the party, and so did the adults. Christ Georges birthday has been celebrated for ages, its only natural.

~PEACE~
 

Milovan

Well-Known Member
Lol Once in Oslo at some Mcdonalds some short employee was trying to put up a poster, i helped her, she was quite shocked i was helping her. I was starving my tits off and got copious amounts of burgers, like prolly 15 or 20 euros worth of those things. Or maybe it was Burger King? Anyways They didnt fucking charge me.
Another curious eating story was in holland. oh my god ill never forget they had these fucking kebabs made inside a fucking margheritta pizza. I was ripped out my cunt, not eaten aaaall day i erradicated 4 kebabs in one sitting and the guy didnt let me pay, he was turkish he said id never seen anyone eat more than 2.
Another time like just after moving to the uk i, taking out some cash from cash point and some weird fella really quickly approaches me and i thought hes robbing me, turns out he was begging for money like RIGHT on top of you at cash point i got scared with the quickness and punched him to the floor. All of a sudden aaaaaaaaaall the shop owners are outside praising me and shit, one says i can have a kebab for free at his place. He was a really annoying dickhead always bothering people for money, after that day he stopped too.
Excellent stories!

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Thanks' for sharing!

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bu$hleaguer

Well-Known Member
I got a few-

One time in a 7-11 in providence when I was back in college, a dude robbed the place with an interesting technique. I was back by the beverage coolers and heard her screaming and all this crazy shit up front, but hadn't seen anything at all. I ducked for my life because I assumed some dude with an assault rifle or a pistol was up there. After about a minute she was still screaming and I was sure the guy had left so I ran up to help and she was begging me to help her behind the counter so I jumped over. Lol this monster boa was laying on top of her and she was as white as a ghost. I picked the fucking snake up, jumped the counter and threw it out on the sidewalk. The fucking dude had thrown a huge snake on her. To this day I still don't know if he got off with any money or not. She asked me what I was there to buy, so I told her a pack of smokes and some beer. She gave me a carton and a case of beer for free.
 
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