Which leaves will end up as buds?

I have 2 questions as this is my first grow...

1- I have 2 plants (1 Male/ 1 Female). Turns out that the roots for the smaller (female) didn't develop as well as for the other plant (male).
Male Plant- 2+ feet
Female Plant- 1 foot
The male plant looks HUGE compared to the small plant. It makes me think that there will not be much yield from the smaller plant. After reading some threads I realize that this may NOT be true.
Question: Which leaves will turn into buds?? Is it based on the size of the leaf, the placement on the stem (after the 4th set of leaves, perhaps?), the leaves that have 5 and 7 parts, etc??
Any help will be appreciated

2- Following the question above- the roots for the smaller plant are still developing. Once I turn to 12/12 should I assume that the roots will not get any larger and it is what it is OR will the roots continue to bulk up after the switch. I dont want to change to 12/12 if I feel like the underdeveloped roots will not produce good bud.

Growing indoor using stealth hyproponics... no soil in my grow.
Been in veg state for 2 months.

Thanks for your expertise....

wooow ok first u need to chop down the fukin male. if u dont your female will get pollinated and u will get a hermy. if u post some pictures of your female then we will be able to kno how much time u got left. The buds will grow from the stalk at the top of every stock or branch. they dont grow on the leaves.

So noted for photos... coming soon.
I want seeds so I want to keep the male (right?). I realize that it will not be the best herb first grow as it is from a seeded plant but I figured once I have seeds I should be good to go(?). The seeded female is smokable just not as good as not seeded?

how did you sex them?
yes seeded bud will not be as good because it uses the THC to produce seeds, so they will have less thc content in them
id also look into cloning, so you wont have to go from seeds all the time(i hate waiting to see if they are girls or boys) that way you can veg for a couple weeks and go straight to flowering

you need to separate them tho as the male will pollinate the female if they are in the same proximity or if you touch the male and then touch the female

Nirvana- Sexed them by sight. Even used the Cannibis College Pix I picked up Amsterdam. Also lots of online "reseach". That's why I was going to 12/12 both plants just to MAKE SURE I am correct with sex of each.

Problem with cloning is I dont have any access (space) to be able to set up 2 sets of grows/lights. In other words, if I leaf (or stem) clone my female, I should do that as the flowers start to show (right??), but I would need to have the clone in a veg stage. If you know what I'm missing, I would LOVE to hear it.

no yield from the male remove it asap. Yes seeded females are smokeable and can be good but the most you will get is a bag of mids go for the nugs thats where its at.