Just after reading this I find it shocking that you are 30. Also you've done this for 15 years. Shocking. You seem extremely wishy, washy if you know what I mean. Without a lot of stability. This may be the reason you are doing this 15 years with little success as you are in the predicament you are now. Not successful in my book at least. After harvest take a deep breath, relax And take some time and think if you may need some other career path or just grow dank for the love and urself. Either way always want to send good vibes too you and wish you luck. Took like 30k to get it going out here in cali. Just as an idea