mikek420
Well-Known Member
After my recent trip that resulted in complete ego death for me for a couple hours, I'd like to see what everyone's experiences are with this phenomenon?
I have experienced it twice.
The first time was 4 hits of triple dipped acid. This particular portion of the trip, I was walking around my house, looking at stuff come alive, suddenly, and I mean like out of nowhere suddenly I watched everything go completely black. Ripples of golden light emerged from where everything would have been ( slightly forming the chairs tables etc. and my entire body, which disappeared into a golden figure that looked like a tiny person (like an Oscar or something, barely human form but more human than anything else. As I saw this happen everything burst apart and zoomed in and in and in till I observed single molecules and atoms. At this point I became senseless to the point that I was even there. I could see 360° and above and below me although it was black with a few huge atoms and molecules. I began to grow huge, but again there was no me just the fact that there was something there to observe this being there. My sight began to see the outside of the house then the neighborhood and the area and the USA and then the world solar system and finally the galaxy and it was all clear as can be, but it didn't seem as if it was "I" or "me" that observed it, just that it was happening and it was the only thing in existence at that point. Finally I seemed to kind of form a shimmery blue figure that was supposed to be me, and I could see tall skinny people that kind of looked like pillars of blue flames. These things started to talk at me in the voice of bees and the more they talked the more I seemed to become whole and myself again. I started to try to talk back to them and suddenly I found myself in my kitchen with my friend shaking me. I kinda pushed him away and relaxed and suddenly I was right back. Again, I was shaken awake and again I tried to go back but this time I didn't. I was kind of like what the fuck?! To my friend but he didn't know any better.
My second time with ego death was astonishing. Part of me thinks maybe I'm still back at that stage and everything now is just a dream. Part of me thinks I actually died then and then brought my being back into this form (body?) And can control most of what happens from now on. Part of me is completely relieved that I am alive that I am normal and sane and that I no longer fear the actual death of my physical body. I had taken two hits (0.20 grams) of 4acodmt. I dissolved it in about 1 cm3 of water, barely a soda capful. I let it dissolve for about half an hour while stirring occasionally then drinking it in two slugs ( it was so concentrated and bitter I kind of had to to choke down even that small an amount) after 45 minutes, I began to see things and hear voices. 1 hour or so these whispers began to get louder and suddenly instead of just (hey listen...) (Psst over here...) (Random words...) It began to be flooded absolutely flooded with people. Not just my voice but millions of voices. I began to get scared as there were too many voices. Where the heck were the coming from??
Old men and women
Young men and women
Children
Occasionally a baby
All talking at once. So loud I began to think I'm scared! (Wait what am I referring to? Who is scared?) Me! There are too many people talking I can hear everything! ( what is I?) I is... Not sure we can't figure who I is!
I kept trying to think of my name (mike. Your name is mike. Youre in you're basement) I kept repeating that. But as my eyes looked down and saw this form that was Michael, it didn't make sense.
WE don't understand why THIS form wants to call us MICHAEL
It seemed like it was saying. I am confused I'm not sure what's going on, but the more times I would say
I
Me
Mike
It made less and less sense, it got to the point where I sat on my bed mumbling to myself
Help me help me help me
And finished by saying
Help help help
Because it was the only thing to make sense.
This was numerous voices, like crowded stadium numerous, more than that each one saying you are US now come with US be US
and one tiny voice screaming like a mouse I I I I and it made no sense. Who is this voice referring to? It certainly can't be that guy staring back in the mirror!
Finally I gave in and said what do you want US to do? What can you teach US and what can WE do right now to learn (and not go crazy!!)
A strong female voice came to me and told US
WE should lie down. Calm OURSELF listen to OUR voice but just stay and calm and WE will take it from there.
I lay and all the color drained out and I was shown sacred geometry to 4 or 5 dimensions each one more perfect and more beautiful than the last one and I was taught a song (which I am foolish to have not written anything down but... not really wanting to move) which allowed the world to reform I was shown the big bang and how atoms form and then finally I was shown the color of music. Finally the voices left me and I was left with weird visuals and other stuff, but at that point I was finally ME again.
So I am curious and would like to know very much
If anyone has an experience with ego death.
How long did it last?
What happened?
What did you take and how long til it took effect if you know?
Were you shown anything remarkable that you could teach us?
If you experience it multiple times are you able to manipulate it and be taught or shown what you want to see?
I have experienced it twice.
The first time was 4 hits of triple dipped acid. This particular portion of the trip, I was walking around my house, looking at stuff come alive, suddenly, and I mean like out of nowhere suddenly I watched everything go completely black. Ripples of golden light emerged from where everything would have been ( slightly forming the chairs tables etc. and my entire body, which disappeared into a golden figure that looked like a tiny person (like an Oscar or something, barely human form but more human than anything else. As I saw this happen everything burst apart and zoomed in and in and in till I observed single molecules and atoms. At this point I became senseless to the point that I was even there. I could see 360° and above and below me although it was black with a few huge atoms and molecules. I began to grow huge, but again there was no me just the fact that there was something there to observe this being there. My sight began to see the outside of the house then the neighborhood and the area and the USA and then the world solar system and finally the galaxy and it was all clear as can be, but it didn't seem as if it was "I" or "me" that observed it, just that it was happening and it was the only thing in existence at that point. Finally I seemed to kind of form a shimmery blue figure that was supposed to be me, and I could see tall skinny people that kind of looked like pillars of blue flames. These things started to talk at me in the voice of bees and the more they talked the more I seemed to become whole and myself again. I started to try to talk back to them and suddenly I found myself in my kitchen with my friend shaking me. I kinda pushed him away and relaxed and suddenly I was right back. Again, I was shaken awake and again I tried to go back but this time I didn't. I was kind of like what the fuck?! To my friend but he didn't know any better.
My second time with ego death was astonishing. Part of me thinks maybe I'm still back at that stage and everything now is just a dream. Part of me thinks I actually died then and then brought my being back into this form (body?) And can control most of what happens from now on. Part of me is completely relieved that I am alive that I am normal and sane and that I no longer fear the actual death of my physical body. I had taken two hits (0.20 grams) of 4acodmt. I dissolved it in about 1 cm3 of water, barely a soda capful. I let it dissolve for about half an hour while stirring occasionally then drinking it in two slugs ( it was so concentrated and bitter I kind of had to to choke down even that small an amount) after 45 minutes, I began to see things and hear voices. 1 hour or so these whispers began to get louder and suddenly instead of just (hey listen...) (Psst over here...) (Random words...) It began to be flooded absolutely flooded with people. Not just my voice but millions of voices. I began to get scared as there were too many voices. Where the heck were the coming from??
Old men and women
Young men and women
Children
Occasionally a baby
All talking at once. So loud I began to think I'm scared! (Wait what am I referring to? Who is scared?) Me! There are too many people talking I can hear everything! ( what is I?) I is... Not sure we can't figure who I is!
I kept trying to think of my name (mike. Your name is mike. Youre in you're basement) I kept repeating that. But as my eyes looked down and saw this form that was Michael, it didn't make sense.
WE don't understand why THIS form wants to call us MICHAEL
It seemed like it was saying. I am confused I'm not sure what's going on, but the more times I would say
I
Me
Mike
It made less and less sense, it got to the point where I sat on my bed mumbling to myself
Help me help me help me
And finished by saying
Help help help
Because it was the only thing to make sense.
This was numerous voices, like crowded stadium numerous, more than that each one saying you are US now come with US be US
and one tiny voice screaming like a mouse I I I I and it made no sense. Who is this voice referring to? It certainly can't be that guy staring back in the mirror!
Finally I gave in and said what do you want US to do? What can you teach US and what can WE do right now to learn (and not go crazy!!)
A strong female voice came to me and told US
WE should lie down. Calm OURSELF listen to OUR voice but just stay and calm and WE will take it from there.
I lay and all the color drained out and I was shown sacred geometry to 4 or 5 dimensions each one more perfect and more beautiful than the last one and I was taught a song (which I am foolish to have not written anything down but... not really wanting to move) which allowed the world to reform I was shown the big bang and how atoms form and then finally I was shown the color of music. Finally the voices left me and I was left with weird visuals and other stuff, but at that point I was finally ME again.
So I am curious and would like to know very much
If anyone has an experience with ego death.
How long did it last?
What happened?
What did you take and how long til it took effect if you know?
Were you shown anything remarkable that you could teach us?
If you experience it multiple times are you able to manipulate it and be taught or shown what you want to see?