Great Stoner Quotes

mine is in my sig..... by pandabear.... I thought it was a pretty damn good one too!

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dude great quote me and a couple friends were eating at a chinese resaraunt while very stoned and one of them turns to me and says

"if the food were alive, would it think we were giants?"

we laughed our asses off for ages
 
These aren't quotes...but we think they're forking funny.

funny&


When Milk goes BAD...
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Nice dude...here's another chinese restaurant one for ya Smoketwo....walked into our local china wok to see our friend standing at the buffet... when we got over to him the first thing he said was......"damn...there's alot of squirrel in this!" oh my god did we laugh... all threw munchin


sorry one more...."mmm gopher on a stick"
 
crap, sorry, here's one from just today...

crusin around, (obviously burnin one) with one of my best friends ...funny lil skater chic...listening to a new cd and then she said...ya naw dude....there's some really interesting.... like....facts, about this band...but I..... ..............forgot um

holy crap we fuckin laughed at her!
 
haha, another master wok one..

Walkin thru the mall foodcourt completely baked, we happen to walk by this lady handing out samples for master wok, so i grabbed one, and she goes to hand one to my friend and hes like "Sorry i dont eat dog"

bahahaha i spit my food everywhere i dont think i've ever laughed that hard in my life
 
I'm the lead line cook at this restaurant and a friend of mine came up to the bar baked out of his mind and asked me what was good to eat. I reccommended the filet special and he goes, "I don't eat fish." So I said, "It's steak dude." Then he says, "Filet means fish... duh." I laughed so hard at him, it was great.
 
"Dont hog that spliff, it doesnt grow on trees man." What was funny about it was he was serious, he didnt think about what he said, cos he was :joint:

PS yeah, missing keys, so its not just me lol Godam lighters are apain too. one second ur holding it the next sec ur not. Ends up in the fridge and everything. LOL
 
"im glad our last name isnt Drew cuz then youd be Nancy Drew and id be Andrew Drew"Andy from Weeds

"when does cpr become necrophilia?"Doug from Weeds
 
My hands can touch anything but themselves can touch anything but themselves... o wait.......

You know man, they call them fingers, but you never see them fing... O there they go

But daddys new medicine, which you can NEVER EVER use! lets him see and hear magical things.

- Medical Marijuana (simpsons)
 
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