Do you raise your voice...

[Lurpin]

Does anyone else have this issue. Sometimes I'm not even angry. I'm just feeling like my point isn't getting across, or especially when I've literally repeated myself a few times. I find my voice getting louder and louder. Like subconsciously I think they literally can't hear me. Then other times I'm just pissed and my voice turns up.

How does everyone else deal with this? There are others that have this issue? I'm actually a quiet person most times. That's why this bothers me when I catch myself doing it.

 

[Venus55]

Are u talking about when you’re in a work environment or social setting? Or doesn’t matter it just happens anywhere?

 

[Lurpin]

Mostly social environments. With people I'm comfortable with.

 

[Venus55]

So drinking, smoking, both, none of the above just whenever? Are u aggressive when u raise your voice or just loud trying to get your point across? Have your friends expressed to you that it bothers or upsets them?

 

[Lurpin]

No not really aggressive. Like you know how if you're trying to be a part of a conversation, and someone just keeps interrupting you. In those situations I find myself raising my voice volume to continue to talk.

 

[Quani]

Im not native speaker so I will do my best !

If someone keep interrutping first you have to say to him, so you can keep a normal conversation. Some people never stop and you kinda need to lead them lol.

The main thing though IMHO is that you did not realize or accept that your friends may not understand some of your thought. You keep asking for them something they can't give to you so what you get is the same non response, which get you mad of course.

Try to communicate your feelings before getting mad, and if nothing changes it's pretty much always the same in life: accept it or leave it !

Cheers

 

[Venus55]

No not really aggressive. Like you know how if you're trying to be a part of a conversation, and someone just keeps interrupting you. In those situations I find myself raising my voice volume to continue to talk.

I think in that case your probably just being self conscious. If someone keeps cutting u off of course your voice will tend to rise.

If none of your friends have come to you to say it’s a problem don’t worry about it. You can either raise your voice, tell the person who likes to interrupt to pipe down and let u speak for a minute, or say nothing at all. Your call. But I’d stop over thinking it.

 

[Roger A. Shrubber]

i have a soft voice, and people talk over me all the time. i generally ignore it and let them run off at the mouth. if it seems to me like they're about to do something they will regret, i'll speak loud enough to point it out. after three or four warnings, they seem to start looking to me without me saying anything, like i'm the arbiter of idiocy....which i guess i am, from time to time

 

[Roger A. Shrubber]

some people are just freaking loud. my ex wife's entire family are loud as fuck. and there are a lot of them. she'd drag me to holiday gatherings, and i hated it. she has 4 sisters, 3 brothers, and 11 nieces and nephews. and they all yell at each other, all talk at once, all try to talk over each other.....i'd end up sitting outside as far away from them as i could get. i didn't hate any of them in particular, but i just couldn't take the noise.

 

[Venus55]

i’m known to be loud... unfortunately. I just tend to get carried away and over excited at times. My parents would always say “We’re just here Vee, no need to yell.” And other times I’d hear my dad saying to mum does she think it’s worth having my hearing tested. Lol.

I’ve settled down a lot since then.

 

[Lurpin]

Hey thanks for all the responses guys. Made me feel better.

 

[thepenofareadywriter]

maybe you are not talking loud enough and people just don't hear you. I caught myself doing that many times. just speak a little louder but don't yell

 

[ThebullVermont]

My wife reminds me quite often that my volume is too high even though I wasn't angry or trying to emphasize a point. I think it may be old age causing a hearing loss which then attributes to me speaking loudly.

 

[ruby fruit]

Hey thanks for all the responses guys. Made me feel better.

If your opinion counts to you do what you have to do to be heard...if they still talk over you they don't value your opinion.
It's not you ...it's them

 

[Bugeye]

I think it is a good thing to be conscious of, especially if in an argument. Most anger is misplaced and we only amplify it by going louder. But important to express the anger and get to the root of it in a quiet state.