Happy thread :)

Status
Not open for further replies.
Jimdamick

Jimdamick

Well-Known Member
Here's my funny story of the day :)

I was listening to this band & I thought about the time I went to see these guy's 4 years ago with my son at a venue in NYC.
We went down to the stage/dance floor to be close to the band (we were right up front) & these 2 women edge in front of us & I'm like fuck it, one of them was gorgeous, so they can stay
Anyway, the band comes on and to my utter amazement/what the fuck?/revulsion, those 2 in front of me start making out/grinding with great enthusiasm/abandon.
Your probably all thinking, cool, lucky guy, right?
Wrong :(
They other one though was fucking UGLY!!!!!!
Like 5'2'/250 lbs/warts & other debris covering her bulbous thing she has to call her face.
I mean if I was drunk as fuck & had just done an 1/8th of Peruvian Pink (Yup, there was such a thing :) )/just got outta jail & hadn't gotten laid (with a woman at least) in 25 years, I still wouldn't fuckher/it
And I had to watch this shit the whole fucking night'
Oh well, the band was great & those two almost having sex in front of me made it a memorable show
:)

Very good Irish band/buy any album if you like Electronica/Dance

 
Jimdamick

Jimdamick

Well-Known Member
DIY-HP-LED said:
View attachment 5104878
Click to expand...
Here is a funny story about someone taking a shit in a public bathroom.

Anyway, I was working in the city hall in New Rochelle on the 3rd floor with this fucking nutcase that ate steroids for breakfast & I'm not kidding.
This guy burnt down a restaurant to score money to buy blow (he was a coke head also) & spent a year in the slammer for that one.
Oh yea, he also killed this guy & buried him on the land he owned in the Berkshire Mts in NY because this guy had theoretically raped his whore sister.
And whore she was so I doubted anyone had to force himself upon her.

I've met a lot of freaks in my life but this guy was leader of the pack by a long shot.

He once let a guy blow him for $100 & then beat him up & took the rest of his cash.
And he was like 6'3" & 250 pounds of muscle with this yellow beard (he was a long hair blond) so he looked like a Viking
Anyway, by now you should get an idea of what this guy was like, so here's the story.

Doug (his name) & myself were installing some data cable on the 3rd floor of this old building which didn't have a public restroom, only a small Men's & Ladies room with 1 stall each that were back to back so you could actually hear what was going on in room next to you.
So, on this day I had to take a wicked shit so I told Doug I was going to take a dump & I'll be back.
I go to the Men's room & the stall was occupied of course & I really, really had to go so I went into the Ladies room

I didn't give a fuck & there wasn't an alternative.

Now the fun began

I'm taking my dump in the Ladies room when I hear the Men's room door slamming open behind me & then Doug roaring "Holy shit, what the fuck crawled up your ass & died.

"You are fucking disgusting/I should kill you to save the world from your stench, you filthy Irish POS.

Stuff like that for a long, long time/pounding & yelling "I'm gonna kill ya when you come out"

You see, he thought it was me in the stall when actually it was this nerd programmer that looked like Wally Cox,
So, for the next 2 or 3 minutes Doug was yelling & pounding on the stall door telling that poor guy that he was a vile creature & deserved death to save humanity from his stench.

Oh my God, I don't think I ever laughed so hard in my life

I go back to where we were working & in a little while he comes back & I tell him what just happened & then he started laughing;

Yup, it was pretty funny, that's for sure, it was just too bad it cost him his job,

He was fired the next day :(

Oh well, I really didn't like him anyway


.
 
Last edited:
Jimdamick

Jimdamick

Well-Known Member
topcat said:
Say man!
@Jimdamick
Hey baby!
I saw your wife the other day!
Yeah?
Yeah, an' she's ug-leeee!
Yeah, she's ugly, but she sure can cook, baby!
Yeah, alright!
If you want to be happy. Jimmy Soul.

Click to expand...
How the fuck did you associate me with that song.
Your fucking weird
As far as seeing my wife, you couldn't have.
Did she look like this?

1647829860803.png

If she didn't, it wasn't her
You would have turned into stone if it was her & couldn't type.
Liar
 
Last edited:
topcat

topcat

Well-Known Member
Jimdamick said:
How the fuck did you associate me with that song.
Your fucking weird
As far as seeing my wife, you couldn't have.
Did she look like this?

View attachment 5105178
If she didn't, it wasn't her
You would have turned into stone if it was her & couldn't type.
Liar
Click to expand...
Your description of the concert gal. I forgot to hit reply first. The wife part is incidental, just a humorous back and forth between guys. Sheesh!
I struck out swinging.
 
cannabineer

cannabineer

Ursus marijanus
Don't Bogart said:
Bet her dad is really glad his hard earned money for her education is being well used.
Click to expand...
I think the gallery of litterers is quite cool. Think of the skills displayed.
1) isolating and sequencing DNA
2) (biggie) computing likely features from the derived genomes
3) running a Cnc 3D printer.

It’s an impressive coordination of objectives and skills. It’s almost better than a typed résumé. I applaud her sense of adventure. Or if nothing else her litteracy.
 
DIY-HP-LED

DIY-HP-LED

Well-Known Member
Don't Bogart said:
Bet her dad is really glad his hard earned money for her education is being well used.
Click to expand...
I think she's so smart, she got through most on scholarships. She could get a job with the police doing forensics or teaching others how to do it. Imagine creating faces from DNA, feed the sequences into a computer and a face appears on the screen. Vacuum up the DNA at a crime site and perhaps get a list of suspects in the future, the art makes the point and gets her money for research that could be very useful. DNA has solved thousands of cold case files and they can even use relatives DNA to hunt down suspects these days. It's useful cutting edge stuff that takes a big brain to master, not too many could pull that off.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top