Perma-fried, Perma-tripping, or just a little crazy???

[PuffDeeCee]

First of all most crazy people don't think they are crazy. Next, binging on MDMA can have some short term psychological consequences. I'm speaking from first hand experience.

If psychedelics have taught you anything it is that you are exactly who you think you are. You have control over your thoughts, so you have control of who you are. Be who you want to be, not what you think someone might judge you as or anything else for that matter. I do shit tons of psychedelics (no more mdma for me), and most of the time I KNOW I'm the most normal guy in the room. The fact that you are having this conversation with yourself and us is more than most "normal" people would do. Most would hit up the GP for the SSRI of the month, get an h1n1 and flu vaccine and pretend everything is OK.

All that said, try and go to a doc and get a script for 0.5mg xanax. It'll help with the social anxiety that is the price we pay when we overindulge in certain serotonergic compounds. They will try and stick you on some effexor or paxil. These are great for some people, but just complicate matters whose problems are caused by serotonergic compounds IMO. Just tell the doc the anxiety comes on suddenly, without warning. Don't get in the habit of using more than 1mg/day.

Meditate. Weed helps for sure. Using psychs purely for recreational purposes can come with a price, especially MDMA. You'll get through this and be better for it. If I were in your shoes, a period of abstinence followed by a supervised MAOI/DMT session with a trusted counselor followed by another period of abstinence, would be in my future . That's just me though. Peace

 

[Brevity, The Soul Of Wit!]

Didnt Growwwww post a very similar post??? LOL But his was perfect so yours is perfect LOL.

 

[ndangerspecimen101]

I do believe that people who are 'insane' are more enlightened then they were 'sane'- BREVITY

The insane either have a deficiancy or they are overwhelmed with nuerotranmitters just firing away!

 

[JustaFarmer]

First of all most crazy people don't think they are crazy. Next, binging on MDMA can have some short term psychological consequences. I'm speaking from first hand experience.

If psychedelics have taught you anything it is that you are exactly who you think you are. You have control over your thoughts, so you have control of who you are. Be who you want to be, not what you think someone might judge you as or anything else for that matter. I do shit tons of psychedelics (no more mdma for me), and most of the time I KNOW I'm the most normal guy in the room. The fact that you are having this conversation with yourself and us is more than most "normal" people would do. Most would hit up the GP for the SSRI of the month, get an h1n1 and flu vaccine and pretend everything is OK.

All that said, try and go to a doc and get a script for 0.5mg xanax. It'll help with the social anxiety that is the price we pay when we overindulge in certain serotonergic compounds. They will try and stick you on some effexor or paxil. These are great for some people, but just complicate matters whose problems are caused by serotonergic compounds IMO. Just tell the doc the anxiety comes on suddenly, without warning. Don't get in the habit of using more than 1mg/day.

Meditate. Weed helps for sure. Using psychs purely for recreational purposes can come with a price, especially MDMA. You'll get through this and be better for it. If I were in your shoes, a period of abstinence followed by a supervised MAOI/DMT session with a trusted counselor followed by another period of abstinence, would be in my future . That's just me though. Peace

wow...well i h have spoken to my doctor about this before, and it kind of sucked because he was only in the room for a minute, i dont feel the got the true nature of whats going on... he gave me something called lexapro, i took it for about a month, nothing changed i still felt the same way, but my temper was significantlly shorter when i took it and i would just snap on people...so i stopped and so have the mood swings...i havent talked to him about xanax, for the simple reason that i think he wont givr it to me because i am asking about it...i worry that he will feel that this is drug seeking behavior and wont help me out... as far as the meditation i try often but have only got to the point where i feel my body float, and my mind is completely awake in a subconcious state... the first time it happened i got excited and woke up...the second time i tried to fly, i went up through the roof of the house straight up into the sky then came falling back down...i have not been able to meditate since this and have tried many any times...weed def helps, im more productive/constructive also when im high... I was talking with my father about this and his take on it was, he thinks hes the only right normal one in the world, and everyone else is nuts...works for him i guess....ignorance is bliss right??

You arent crazy. You just like putting more than the necessary amount of full stops at the end of sentences...

Dude, dont worry, maybe stop doing drugs for a bit?

Make sure you are getting good sleep everynight, take up a really nice peaceful hobby. But remember sleep well, this really means alot.

Anyway, you aint crazy! dont worry!

Peace

actually i feel life i have insomnia.... i try to sleep at night and cannot until i am so tired i cant keep my eyes open, usually i lay in bed trying to go to sleep for 2-3 hours....i try to stay on a normal sleep schedule but i cannot...i dont know why...i only sleep 4-6 hours a day...more often than not its 4

You already know the answer to your question.....In fact, you already know the answer to everything.....Of course, this can be a little hard to accept.....Is it insanity? Maybe insanity is only defined by the ones who haven't graduated to your level of cognizance.....Wrap your arms around your new-found perception and take the plunge.

I do, I do, i am just having a really hard time wrapping my head around it...i dont know what to do... and i concour that i am proably on a higher level than most around me, which is both good and bad...makes it hard to deal... Heres some food for thought..... Imagine life as a baseball game... does anyone every feel like there is a whole other level that this game is being played on?? same idea and objective but not the same rules, and its invisible most of the time? kinda hard to explain but, in life there is a parrallel universe, where everything looks thje same but it isnot.... i dunno hopefully someone can relate.... And my favorite topic... Manifestation.... any thoughts ideas reccomendation on this subject? what im talking about is when you want something so bad and you let the thought manifest in you mind for so long, eventually it happens and becomes your new reality? its like a wormhole...its what happens when people wake up and are like shit, im married and have 2 kids and a minivan... its when we realize where our life has led us but at the same time you just realize where you are and whats going on? you can manifest anything and with enough power it will happen...it takes time though i think....lots of time, and i am not a very patient person....im kinda new to the whole idea of it and would like to learn more..if that even possible? ways to manipulate it, get what you want, it sounds weird but control the world before your eyes....i know its possible, if you dont think so then we are just on a different level thats all... like i said, i can be a normal person in society, deal with all kinda of people, but some of these thoughts here are what my mind normally thinks about...i dont know...enough rambling for today

 

[JustaFarmer]

Meditate. Weed helps for sure. Using psychs purely for recreational purposes can come with a price, especially MDMA. You'll get through this and be better for it. If I were in your shoes, a period of abstinence followed by a supervised MAOI/DMT session with a trusted counselor followed by another period of abstinence, would be in my future . That's just me though. Peace What is MAOI?? i know what DMT is and have been wanting to do it but have been scared to do it simply becuase its only released when your born and when you die... i have this thought in my head when i do it i will die...i dont know kinda freaks me out a little bit..and when you say supervised do you mean with a friend or like a doctor in a lab?

 

[ndangerspecimen101]

I am looking for BREVITY in a definition... maybe in a sense of not the word, but a whole of the plot!

 

[Brevity, The Soul Of Wit!]

Well, here's Brevity!

 

[ndangerspecimen101]

Well, here's Brevity!

Now summon your powers

 

[Brevity, The Soul Of Wit!]

Roger Wilco

 

[Joshua50187]

seriously its nothing the brief feelings of tripping are called flashbacks its normal nothing is seriously hurt unless it was caused by the mdma i have had friends who's blood vessels in there brains started bursting cause they took so much over a long period of time (im talking about 100's of pills in a month span). now you could have what i like to call burnout (or for "hackers" fans acid burn) which is like you said "your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb" where you don't feel as if you are using all of your potential all that i can speculate that to be is your neurons are fried, not dead just aged alittle, tired if you will they will bounce back eventually also about you refraining from tripping don't worry about it and do what i do dose when the acid tells you to dose.

like i dose when i feel in a calm relaxed state my own personal nirvana then i dose and... then i kick someone in the face throw my life into chaos and start all over again lol

 

[shepj]

Why do people still think that MDMA causes psysical neurological damage?

 

[Brevity, The Soul Of Wit!]

Because that's what the gov tells their parents and that's what their parents tell them.

 

[ndangerspecimen101]

seriously its nothing the brief feelings of tripping are called flashbacks its normal nothing is seriously hurt unless it was caused by the mdma i have had friends who's blood vessels in there brains started bursting cause they took so much over a long period of time (im talking about 100's of pills in a month span). now you could have what i like to call burnout (or for "hackers" fans acid burn) which is like you said "your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb" where you don't feel as if you are using all of your potential all that i can speculate that to be is your neurons are fried, not dead just aged alittle, tired if you will they will bounce back eventually also about you refraining from tripping don't worry about it and do what i do dose when the acid tells you to dose.

like i dose when i feel in a calm relaxed state my own personal nirvana then i dose and... then i kick someone in the face throw my life into chaos and start all over again lol

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Please next time fill us in with those much needed PERIODS!

...and I'm quite confused by this bursting blood vessels! Can you please explain... and it would be wise not to consume a 100 pills in a month span!

 

[Brevity, The Soul Of Wit!]

seriously its nothing the brief feelings of tripping are called flashbacks its normal nothing is seriously hurt unless it was caused by the mdma i have had friends who's blood vessels in there brains started bursting cause they took so much over a long period of time (im talking about 100's of pills in a month span). now you could have what i like to call burnout (or for "hackers" fans acid burn) which is like you said "your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb" where you don't feel as if you are using all of your potential all that i can speculate that to be is your neurons are fried, not dead just aged alittle, tired if you will they will bounce back eventually also about you refraining from tripping don't worry about it and do what i do dose when the acid tells you to dose.

like i dose when i feel in a calm relaxed state my own personal nirvana then i dose and... then i kick someone in the face throw my life into chaos and start all over again lol

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Please next time fill us in with those much needed PERIODS!

...and I'm quite confused by this bursting blood vessels! Can you please explain... and it would be wise not to consume a 100 pills in a month span!

Well, aren't bruises the result of capillaries just under the skin rupturing and the blood coalescing in a pocket beneath the skin???

 

[nj12nets]

I'm not saying your crazy or sane and I enjoy some similar pleasures, but if you have to ask this question then your at a boundary I'm not sure you should cross. My recreational activities haven't called my mental state into question even when having less than ideal trips. I'm not saying to go see a shrink but I've seen people with underlying pyschiatric issues try acid and really go off the deep end damn near for over a year. Be careful man, if you have to question your own mentality after such a short amount of time I'd give it a break, if it's causing you to worry than don't do it. Forget about normal and strange or c razy, but look at how you feel about your thoughts and stuff and if you start feeling nervous or worried about em than there's a problem.

 

[ndangerspecimen101]

I'm not saying your crazy or sane and I enjoy some similar pleasures, but if you have to ask this question then your at a boundary I'm not sure you should cross. My recreational activities haven't called my mental state into question even when having less than ideal trips. I'm not saying to go see a shrink but I've seen people with underlying pyschiatric issues try acid and really go off the deep end damn near for over a year. Be careful man, if you have to question your own mentality after such a short amount of time I'd give it a break, if it's causing you to worry than don't do it. Forget about normal and strange or c razy, but look at how you feel about your thoughts and stuff and if you start feeling nervous or worried about em than there's a problem.

Exactly, no one truly knows your health like you do. If you do fill like your mind is over the edge then taking psychomimetic drugs will do no good in helping you out!

 

[stoneybone]

Dude, it sounds like the rolls and MDMA binge are whats affecting you more than the other psychedelics. Esp. if you aren't getting 7-8 hrs of sleep a night, and that alone can really fuck with your head. I had a similar problem after a few music festivals where i took excessive amounts of MDMA and X. (Overuse of MDMA can throw off your serotonin production, which is a key neurotransmitter in maintaing a proper sleep cycle) I couldnt sleep at night and felt like the world was going so fast and I was going insane because of how exhausted I was mentally. I began to have a low self image and lost my self confidence. You need to get your serotonin levels back to normal and your sleep cycle will correct itself allowing you to calm your mind and return to a peaceful and powerful mind-state. Taking a break from other psychedelics is a smart call for now, but once you have regained your mental state a powerful LSD or mushroom trip will do you wonders! Find positive thoughts, positive energy in yourself and return to this beautiful journey called LIFE as a more spiritual and powerful person than you could ever imagine! ~~~~

"Its OK to lose your mind, as long as you can find it again!"

 

[rory420420]

Things are just getting weird...eat more gels and chill out.

 

[Gonenowhere]

Dude, it sounds like the rolls and MDMA binge are whats affecting you more than the other psychedelics. Esp. if you aren't getting 7-8 hrs of sleep a night, and that alone can really fuck with your head. I had a similar problem after a few music festivals where i took excessive amounts of MDMA and X. (Overuse of MDMA can throw off your serotonin production, which is a key neurotransmitter in maintaing a proper sleep cycle) I couldnt sleep at night and felt like the world was going so fast and I was going insane because of how exhausted I was mentally. I began to have a low self image and lost my self confidence. You need to get your serotonin levels back to normal and your sleep cycle will correct itself allowing you to calm your mind and return to a peaceful and powerful mind-state. Taking a break from other psychedelics is a smart call for now, but once you have regained your mental state a powerful LSD or mushroom trip will do you wonders! Find positive thoughts, positive energy in yourself and return to this beautiful journey called LIFE as a more spiritual and powerful person than you could ever imagine! ~~~~

"Its OK to lose your mind, as long as you can find it again!"

Exactly!!! The pixies sang it over and over again. Where is my mind? WAAAAAAAAY out in the water see it swimming!

 

[TheNameless]

...ignorance is bliss right??

You said it right there, I feel that way all the time regarding my psychedelic experiences (I have had a past very similar to yours). But you can take pride in not being blind. Being enlightened the way we have can be a heavy burden, but its also a good thing I think. I have learned to take the positive from it. It can be hard those first few years after these experiences, but eventually I rose from it all a better person, and I believe you will too.

I do, I do, i am just having a really hard time wrapping my head around it...i dont know what to do... and i concour that i am proably on a higher level than most around me, which is both good and bad...makes it hard to deal... Heres some food for thought..... Imagine life as a baseball game... does anyone every feel like there is a whole other level that this game is being played on?? same idea and objective but not the same rules, and its invisible most of the time? kinda hard to explain but, in life there is a parrallel universe, where everything looks thje same but it isnot.... i dunno hopefully someone can relate.... And my favorite topic... Manifestation.... any thoughts ideas reccomendation on this subject? what im talking about is when you want something so bad and you let the thought manifest in you mind for so long, eventually it happens and becomes your new reality? its like a wormhole...its what happens when people wake up and are like shit, im married and have 2 kids and a minivan... its when we realize where our life has led us but at the same time you just realize where you are and whats going on? you can manifest anything and with enough power it will happen...it takes time though i think....lots of time, and i am not a very patient person....im kinda new to the whole idea of it and would like to learn more..if that even possible? ways to manipulate it, get what you want, it sounds weird but control the world before your eyes....i know its possible, if you dont think so then we are just on a different level thats all... like i said, i can be a normal person in society, deal with all kinda of people, but some of these thoughts here are what my mind normally thinks about...i dont know...enough rambling for today

I know what you mean about all that, and those types of thoughts as well. Idk if you have seen "The Secret", but its a documentary about manifestation. It's a little corny at parts, but is still interesting to hear other peoples experiences with the law of attraction (the law that states, basically that what you think about you bring about, like what you were saying).

But anyways, don't worry man. One day you will look back at these experiences and treasure them for what you learned.

And one more thing, the literal physical toll of the MDMA will heal. About 6 months to a year off the stuff, and your brain will be back to 100%