Pix That Make You LOL-Warning-SNWS
- Thread starter Big P
- Start date
hardroc
New Member
One day a man went on a buissness trip to Florida.
He had saw this hooker and he asked "How much for a hand job?"
The hooker replied "100 Bucks"
The man said "100 Bucks, That's a lot of got damn money"
So the hooker pulled him to the side and said "See that Mercedes, I paid for that by giving hand jobs."
So he gave her the money and received the best hand he had ever had.
The next day he sees her and asks "How much for a head job?"
She said "200 dollars"
"200 dollars that's a lot of money"
She pulled him to the side and said "You see that yahat by the pier, I paid for that yahat by giving head jobs."
So he gives her the money, and get the best head job of his life
On hist last day in Florida he returns to the hooker and says "The hand job was good, the head job was great how much for the whole package."
"1000 dollars'
"1000 dollars that's a lot of god damn money"
So she pulled him to side and said "You see that island, I could afford that if i had a pussy."
He had saw this hooker and he asked "How much for a hand job?"
The hooker replied "100 Bucks"
The man said "100 Bucks, That's a lot of got damn money"
So the hooker pulled him to the side and said "See that Mercedes, I paid for that by giving hand jobs."
So he gave her the money and received the best hand he had ever had.
The next day he sees her and asks "How much for a head job?"
She said "200 dollars"
"200 dollars that's a lot of money"
She pulled him to the side and said "You see that yahat by the pier, I paid for that yahat by giving head jobs."
So he gives her the money, and get the best head job of his life
On hist last day in Florida he returns to the hooker and says "The hand job was good, the head job was great how much for the whole package."
"1000 dollars'
"1000 dollars that's a lot of god damn money"
So she pulled him to side and said "You see that island, I could afford that if i had a pussy."
hardroc
New Member
Steve is shopping for a new motorcycle. He finally finds one for a great price. The motorcycle is missing a seal, though, so whenever it rains Steve has to smear Vaseline over the spot where the seal should be.
Steve’s girlfriend is having him over for dinner to meet her parents one evening. He drives his new motorcycle to his girlfriend’s house.
She is waiting outside for him when he arrives. "No matter what happens at dinner tonight, don't say a word. Our family had a fight a while ago about doing the dinner dishes. We haven't done any since... and the first person to speak at dinner has to do them."
Steve sits down for dinner and soon notices that his girlfriend wasn’t exaggerating. It is just how she described it. Dishes are piled up to the ceiling in the kitchen and nobody is saying a word. Steve decides to have a little fun. He grabs his girlfriend, throws her onto the table and has sex with her in front of her parents. His girlfriend is a little flustered, her father is obviously livid, and her mother is horrified. Yet, when Steve and his girlfriend resume their placs at the dinner table, nobody says a word.
A few minutes later, Steve grabs his girlfriend’s mom, throws her onto the table and does a repeat performance. Now his girlfriend is furious, her father is boiling, and her mother is a little more pleased. But still, there is complete silence at the table.
Suddenly, there is a loud clap of thunder and it starts to rain. Steve remembers his motorcycle outside and so he jumps up and grabs his jar of Vaseline.
With a look of terror in his eyes, the girlfriend’s father backs away from the table and exclaims, "Okay, enough already, I'll do the damn dishes!"
Steve’s girlfriend is having him over for dinner to meet her parents one evening. He drives his new motorcycle to his girlfriend’s house.
She is waiting outside for him when he arrives. "No matter what happens at dinner tonight, don't say a word. Our family had a fight a while ago about doing the dinner dishes. We haven't done any since... and the first person to speak at dinner has to do them."
Steve sits down for dinner and soon notices that his girlfriend wasn’t exaggerating. It is just how she described it. Dishes are piled up to the ceiling in the kitchen and nobody is saying a word. Steve decides to have a little fun. He grabs his girlfriend, throws her onto the table and has sex with her in front of her parents. His girlfriend is a little flustered, her father is obviously livid, and her mother is horrified. Yet, when Steve and his girlfriend resume their placs at the dinner table, nobody says a word.
A few minutes later, Steve grabs his girlfriend’s mom, throws her onto the table and does a repeat performance. Now his girlfriend is furious, her father is boiling, and her mother is a little more pleased. But still, there is complete silence at the table.
Suddenly, there is a loud clap of thunder and it starts to rain. Steve remembers his motorcycle outside and so he jumps up and grabs his jar of Vaseline.
With a look of terror in his eyes, the girlfriend’s father backs away from the table and exclaims, "Okay, enough already, I'll do the damn dishes!"
The Real Peter Parker
Well-Known Member
You want some text action?
Here's a few groaners, that are also quite mean.
What did the quadriplegic blind boy get for Christmas?
Cancer.
Why did the little girl fall off the swing?
Because she didn't have any arms.
Pnuggle
Well-Known Member
haha here we go:
whats red, screams and spins around in a circle?
a baby with its foot nailed to the floor.
okays thats the ONLY dead baby joke allowed. back to the pics.
The Real Peter Parker
Well-Known Member
Can't tell one and not allow another...
haha here we go:
whats red, screams and spins around in a circle?
a baby with its foot nailed to the floor.
okays thats the ONLY dead baby joke allowed. back to the pics.
What's blue and squirms around in the corner? The baby in a plastic bag
What's red and squirms around in the corner? The baby with a razor blade
What's green and sits in the corner? That same baby two weeks later.
Sado68
Member
and also a side note...
“Revolutionary New Underwear For Offensive Gas . A Real Product for a Real Problem”
A US underwear manufacturer has invented pants designed to hide the smell of farts.
The Under-Ease pants have an in-built multi-layered, replaceable filter, made of felt, charcoal and fibreglass wool.
To prevent gases escaping without passing through it, the underpants are made from air-tight fabric and completely sealed with elastic around the waistband and legs.
Under-Tec president and inventor Buck Weimer said: “Under-Ease are underwear for protection against bad human gas.
“We get a lot of jokes - but we don’t doubt that this is a serious product that serves a purpose.
__________________________________
its funny by itself but anyone think they could use they same filter components in a grow filter?
i mean other than charcoal
“Revolutionary New Underwear For Offensive Gas . A Real Product for a Real Problem”
A US underwear manufacturer has invented pants designed to hide the smell of farts.
The Under-Ease pants have an in-built multi-layered, replaceable filter, made of felt, charcoal and fibreglass wool.
To prevent gases escaping without passing through it, the underpants are made from air-tight fabric and completely sealed with elastic around the waistband and legs.
Under-Tec president and inventor Buck Weimer said: “Under-Ease are underwear for protection against bad human gas.
“We get a lot of jokes - but we don’t doubt that this is a serious product that serves a purpose.
__________________________________
its funny by itself but anyone think they could use they same filter components in a grow filter?
i mean other than charcoal
Sado68
Member
The Designer Beaver
If you’ve ever wanted to take up hairdressing but have no interest in the head then we have the toy for you!
With practice you can master styles like the Amazon, Chaplin, Brazilian, Valentine, Bermuda, and The George Bush. Or you can create your own unique design.
If you’ve ever wanted to take up hairdressing but have no interest in the head then we have the toy for you!
With practice you can master styles like the Amazon, Chaplin, Brazilian, Valentine, Bermuda, and The George Bush. Or you can create your own unique design.
CrackerJax
New Member
