You know your a stoner when.......
you got a bowl de-clogger next to the bong because it gets plugged so many fucking times!!
your bong is plugged and the bowl insert isn't the culprit
You put the milk in the freezer and ice cream in the fridge
you forget to put weed out of all things in the pot brownies
when you attempt to smoke the problem out before going to the doctor/ mechanic etc.eg- "You never know man, lets smoke a joint then try starting the mower again"...... WHen the mower doesn't start you smoke another joint and forget about the affiar
You get stoned before everything, inluding your morning shit..... You won't take that excruiciatingly urgent morning shit till your bong is loaded and you found the lighter you lost2 months ago because you haven't a fucking clue where yesterdays lighter walked off to.
you swear your lighters have legs cause you allready lost the 5 lighters you bought yesterday
you clean your house and find 11 lighters, some over a year old
You pull the calyxes out of the bud and chuck the rest
you test brownie potency by eating half the pan then smoke a bowl to keep you high till the brownie kicks in,
You grow way the fuck up the mountian side to achieve a better resin-to-plant matter ratio even though this practice will cut production by 80ish% and wear the brakes out pronto
you forget your shovels all over the place.... swear I got 10 shovels out there some where,lol
You forget your shovel when going to dig holes
You've been in your house smoking pot and never going anywhere for long enough that your neighbour thinks your on vacation
you spend 2 hr making funny messages for your answering machine then playing them back,(some answering machines make people sound fucking hilarius)
You can't figure out the intructions for the barbeque but you can engineer a killer bong in about a half hour....
your pot plants give you the cold shoulder if you ever bring a chic around the house
you don't even bother trying to remeber lighters you just put them everywhere so chances are there's a lighter at hand..... some where
Your dog hides it head in the couch when you go out for the night-cap toke because it knows it's getting put outside after
You flip through ten channels on the TV before you realize you were just trying to turn up the volume.
You have the munchie food right in front of you and you forget to eat 'em
When a commercial comes on you forget what TV show you were just watching.
You light a joint and forget to smoke it.
You smoke a joint thats not lit.
You stare at the clock waiting for 4:20 to come, then you snap out of it and realize it was 4:31.
You have a freshly packed bowl in your hand and half an hour later you realize... You forgot to smoke it
You're on the phone with your best friend and you forget who you're talking to.
Every story you tell begins with, "We were really high and..."
You buy your Visine at a wholesale club
Someone asks you for a dime and you tell them you're out of herb
The High Times centrefold turns you on
Your friends call you Smokey
Your parents call you Smokey
You think everyone is staring at you and there's nobody in the room
Your room turns into your grow room
Your best friend just happens to be your dealer
A friend without weed is a friend in need
Your video collection consists of endless Cheech and Chong sequels
Your too phoned to stone home
Your creativity is only used when you have nothing to smoke out of
The mind is a terrible thing to waste, but you don't mind being wasted
Sorting out life's problems, the answer is always roll, lick and smoke
Your clothes are full of burn holes from dropped joints
If an autobiography of your life was made into a movie, it would be called "Waiting to Inhale"
You get up to do something but end up smoking pot instead
Your motto in life is Why ask Why? Just Get High.
You call people you don't even like to hang out, just because you know they've got bud.
You begin hearing knocks at the door and CD skips that aren't there
you dont go to your mothers funeral just so you can smoke a bow
you smoke while taking a shit
you find weed some where even tho you havent had any in 3 month
every time you clean your room you find a lost sack
AND THE FINAL REASON YOU KNOW YOU'RE A STONER...
When you have to hold onto the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
you geet stuck on the TV guide channel for over an hour, and still dont know whats comin on
you decide to quit smoking while you're high, smoke all the rest of your bud for one last smoke, and buy another sack the next day
you find yourself blazing in the early afternoon and telling someone, "this is the first time i've smoked all day...wait, no its not."
You are chillin with your buddies and see some buds on a sage bush and smoke them to see if you get high
and while smoking you look around and wonder what it would be like if all the pine trees were big ass bud plants haha
you can make a bong or pipe out of anything
you chow down on tortillias with ranch dressing in them because thats all you have to eat
When your professor reffers to you and your buddy as the doobie brothers.
When the chips go in the fridge and the milk goes in the cupboard
if you have ever rear ended a car while cracking a blunt while you are driving
when you have to take a piss bad but keep it in so u can read the rest of this thread
when u smoke a couple bowls on the highway on the way to work (fast speeds, one knee on wheel, 2 hands lighting and smoking pipe = not smart,btw)
when you make a daily log of how much you have smoked so u can remember later
When you bundle up and walk three blocks to 7-11 for smokes, get there leave with a dvd, two candy bars and a gatorade get home and realize you forgot to buy the smokes the thing you actually went there for in the first place...
you know your a stoner when you con't watch tv cause you cant find the remote.
you know your a stoner when you wind up watching the main menu and listening to the music cause you are too lazy to get up and turn it off after you finish watchign a dvd
you know your a stoner when the only math you remember (easily) is ounces, grams, pounds, half pounds, and kilos...and you instantly associate a certain ammount of money for a certain measurement..
You know you're a stoner when you carry around a razor blade specifically to split your blunts...
You know you're a stoner when it's abt 40 degrees outside and you're still wearing sandals.
You know you're a stoner when you let your hair grow and grow to save that extra $10 a month for another gram.
when you keep a pudding snack pack in your cup holder so you can eat it at red lights
you know you're a stoner when you are out of bud, and don't know where to get it, so you ask people that you know definetly don't smoke, but you think there might be a chance that they know someone else that has bud
you know when you're a stoner when you wake up with a ritz crackers , a knife, and a tub of peanut butter in your bed - none of which were used before passing out and falling into a weed induced coma
You know you're a stoner when you realize you've been sitting for five minutes at a blinking red light.
you take a shit and it smells like weed
.. when herb becomes your currency
.. when you dont even get high anymore when you toke, you just feel normal.
.. when you wander off stoned and end up at your fridge multiple times in a night.
.. you have more friends on siccness than in real life.
.. when you have posted on a thread like this more than twice and still post again when a new one is made..
you got a bowl de-clogger next to the bong because it gets plugged so many fucking times!!
your bong is plugged and the bowl insert isn't the culprit
You put the milk in the freezer and ice cream in the fridge
you forget to put weed out of all things in the pot brownies
when you attempt to smoke the problem out before going to the doctor/ mechanic etc.eg- "You never know man, lets smoke a joint then try starting the mower again"...... WHen the mower doesn't start you smoke another joint and forget about the affiar
You get stoned before everything, inluding your morning shit..... You won't take that excruiciatingly urgent morning shit till your bong is loaded and you found the lighter you lost2 months ago because you haven't a fucking clue where yesterdays lighter walked off to.
you swear your lighters have legs cause you allready lost the 5 lighters you bought yesterday
you clean your house and find 11 lighters, some over a year old
You pull the calyxes out of the bud and chuck the rest
you test brownie potency by eating half the pan then smoke a bowl to keep you high till the brownie kicks in,
You grow way the fuck up the mountian side to achieve a better resin-to-plant matter ratio even though this practice will cut production by 80ish% and wear the brakes out pronto
you forget your shovels all over the place.... swear I got 10 shovels out there some where,lol
You forget your shovel when going to dig holes
You've been in your house smoking pot and never going anywhere for long enough that your neighbour thinks your on vacation
you spend 2 hr making funny messages for your answering machine then playing them back,(some answering machines make people sound fucking hilarius)
You can't figure out the intructions for the barbeque but you can engineer a killer bong in about a half hour....
your pot plants give you the cold shoulder if you ever bring a chic around the house
you don't even bother trying to remeber lighters you just put them everywhere so chances are there's a lighter at hand..... some where
Your dog hides it head in the couch when you go out for the night-cap toke because it knows it's getting put outside after
You flip through ten channels on the TV before you realize you were just trying to turn up the volume.
You have the munchie food right in front of you and you forget to eat 'em
When a commercial comes on you forget what TV show you were just watching.
You light a joint and forget to smoke it.
You smoke a joint thats not lit.
You stare at the clock waiting for 4:20 to come, then you snap out of it and realize it was 4:31.
You have a freshly packed bowl in your hand and half an hour later you realize... You forgot to smoke it
You're on the phone with your best friend and you forget who you're talking to.
Every story you tell begins with, "We were really high and..."
You buy your Visine at a wholesale club
Someone asks you for a dime and you tell them you're out of herb
The High Times centrefold turns you on
Your friends call you Smokey
Your parents call you Smokey
You think everyone is staring at you and there's nobody in the room
Your room turns into your grow room
Your best friend just happens to be your dealer
A friend without weed is a friend in need
Your video collection consists of endless Cheech and Chong sequels
Your too phoned to stone home
Your creativity is only used when you have nothing to smoke out of
The mind is a terrible thing to waste, but you don't mind being wasted
Sorting out life's problems, the answer is always roll, lick and smoke
Your clothes are full of burn holes from dropped joints
If an autobiography of your life was made into a movie, it would be called "Waiting to Inhale"
You get up to do something but end up smoking pot instead
Your motto in life is Why ask Why? Just Get High.
You call people you don't even like to hang out, just because you know they've got bud.
You begin hearing knocks at the door and CD skips that aren't there
you dont go to your mothers funeral just so you can smoke a bow
you smoke while taking a shit
you find weed some where even tho you havent had any in 3 month
every time you clean your room you find a lost sack
AND THE FINAL REASON YOU KNOW YOU'RE A STONER...
When you have to hold onto the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
you geet stuck on the TV guide channel for over an hour, and still dont know whats comin on
you decide to quit smoking while you're high, smoke all the rest of your bud for one last smoke, and buy another sack the next day
you find yourself blazing in the early afternoon and telling someone, "this is the first time i've smoked all day...wait, no its not."
You are chillin with your buddies and see some buds on a sage bush and smoke them to see if you get high
and while smoking you look around and wonder what it would be like if all the pine trees were big ass bud plants haha
you can make a bong or pipe out of anything
you chow down on tortillias with ranch dressing in them because thats all you have to eat
When your professor reffers to you and your buddy as the doobie brothers.
When the chips go in the fridge and the milk goes in the cupboard
if you have ever rear ended a car while cracking a blunt while you are driving
when you have to take a piss bad but keep it in so u can read the rest of this thread
when u smoke a couple bowls on the highway on the way to work (fast speeds, one knee on wheel, 2 hands lighting and smoking pipe = not smart,btw)
when you make a daily log of how much you have smoked so u can remember later
When you bundle up and walk three blocks to 7-11 for smokes, get there leave with a dvd, two candy bars and a gatorade get home and realize you forgot to buy the smokes the thing you actually went there for in the first place...
you know your a stoner when you con't watch tv cause you cant find the remote.
you know your a stoner when you wind up watching the main menu and listening to the music cause you are too lazy to get up and turn it off after you finish watchign a dvd
you know your a stoner when the only math you remember (easily) is ounces, grams, pounds, half pounds, and kilos...and you instantly associate a certain ammount of money for a certain measurement..
You know you're a stoner when you carry around a razor blade specifically to split your blunts...
You know you're a stoner when it's abt 40 degrees outside and you're still wearing sandals.
You know you're a stoner when you let your hair grow and grow to save that extra $10 a month for another gram.
when you keep a pudding snack pack in your cup holder so you can eat it at red lights
you know you're a stoner when you are out of bud, and don't know where to get it, so you ask people that you know definetly don't smoke, but you think there might be a chance that they know someone else that has bud
you know when you're a stoner when you wake up with a ritz crackers , a knife, and a tub of peanut butter in your bed - none of which were used before passing out and falling into a weed induced coma
You know you're a stoner when you realize you've been sitting for five minutes at a blinking red light.
you take a shit and it smells like weed
.. when herb becomes your currency
.. when you dont even get high anymore when you toke, you just feel normal.
.. when you wander off stoned and end up at your fridge multiple times in a night.
.. you have more friends on siccness than in real life.
.. when you have posted on a thread like this more than twice and still post again when a new one is made..
. 