haha the thing is, i'd love to appreciate a guy, make him feel special, make him smile and feel good, take care of him within reason... but guys want a hot girl, sexy body, etc... and my face isnt ugly at all, my body however.... well im pretty big. Not like unable to walk, nor does my fat hang by my knees, but im big. Ive never had a bf, or had sex, and i got my first kiss may 1st of this year. Ive done a bit more sexually since then, but still a virgin. Im 18. Idk if there is anyone out there for me... cause i mean ive come close to having relationships before but the guy always changed his mind. wanted to be with another girl, generally way skinnier than me. So to recap, I'd love to be appreciative and loving, but there is no guy to do that for.