Pix That Make You LOL-Warning-SNWS
- Thread starter Big P
- Start date
Winter Woman
Well-Known Member
An old guy goes to his doctor for his physical and gets sent to the Urologist as a precaution. When he gets there, he discovers the Urologist is a very pretty female doctor.
The female doctor says, "I'm going to check your prostate today, but this new procedure is a little different from what you are probably used to. I want you to lie on your right side, bend your knees, then while I check your prostate, take a deep breath and say, '99'.
The old guy obeys and says,"99".
The pretty doctor says, "Great.Now turn over on your left side and again, while I repeat the check, take a deep breath and say, '99'."
Again, the old guy says, '99'."
The doctor said, Very good. Now then, I want you to lie on your back with your knees raised slightly. I'm going to check your prostate with this hand, and with the other hand I'm going to hold on to your penis to keep it out of the way. Now take a deep breath and say, '99'.
The old guy begins, "One ... Two ... Three" ...
The female doctor says, "I'm going to check your prostate today, but this new procedure is a little different from what you are probably used to. I want you to lie on your right side, bend your knees, then while I check your prostate, take a deep breath and say, '99'.
The old guy obeys and says,"99".
The pretty doctor says, "Great.Now turn over on your left side and again, while I repeat the check, take a deep breath and say, '99'."
Again, the old guy says, '99'."
The doctor said, Very good. Now then, I want you to lie on your back with your knees raised slightly. I'm going to check your prostate with this hand, and with the other hand I'm going to hold on to your penis to keep it out of the way. Now take a deep breath and say, '99'.
The old guy begins, "One ... Two ... Three" ...
Winter Woman
Well-Known Member
Attachments
Winter Woman
Well-Known Member
[FONT="]Forty Things a Southerner Would Never say![/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]40. Oh We just couldn't. Hell, they're only sixteen.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]39. I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]38. Duct tape won't fix that.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]37. Lisa Marie was lucky to catch Michael. [/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]36. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]35. We don't keep firearms in this house. [/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]34. Has anybody seen the sideburns trimmer? [/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]33. You can't feed THAT to the dog![/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]32. I thought Graceland was tacky.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]31. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]30. Wrasslin's fake.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]29. Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace? [/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]28. We're vegetarians.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]27. Do you think my gut/ass is too big?[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]26. I'll have grapefruit & grapes instead of biscuits & gravy.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]25. Honey, we don't need another dog.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]24. Who's Richard Petty? [/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]23. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]22. Too many deer heads detract from the decor.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]21. Spittin is such a nasty habit.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]20. I just couldn't find a thing at Walmart today.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]19. Trim the fat off that steak.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]18. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]17. The tires on that truck are too big.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]16. I'll have the arugula and radicchio salad.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]15. I've got it all on the C drive.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]14. Unsweetened tea tastes better.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]13. Would you like your salmon poached or broiled?[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]12. My fiance, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]11. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]10. Little Debbie snack cakes have too many fat grams.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 9. Checkmate.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 8. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 7. Does the salad bar have bean sprouts? [/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 6. Here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 5. I don't have a favorite college team.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 4. Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the side.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 3. I believe you cooked those soup beans too long.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 2. Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Darla.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 1. Nope, no more for me. I'm drivin tonight. [/FONT]
[FONT="]40. Oh We just couldn't. Hell, they're only sixteen.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]39. I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]38. Duct tape won't fix that.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]37. Lisa Marie was lucky to catch Michael. [/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]36. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]35. We don't keep firearms in this house. [/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]34. Has anybody seen the sideburns trimmer? [/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]33. You can't feed THAT to the dog![/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]32. I thought Graceland was tacky.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]31. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]30. Wrasslin's fake.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]29. Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace? [/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]28. We're vegetarians.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]27. Do you think my gut/ass is too big?[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]26. I'll have grapefruit & grapes instead of biscuits & gravy.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]25. Honey, we don't need another dog.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]24. Who's Richard Petty? [/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]23. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]22. Too many deer heads detract from the decor.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]21. Spittin is such a nasty habit.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]20. I just couldn't find a thing at Walmart today.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]19. Trim the fat off that steak.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]18. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]17. The tires on that truck are too big.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]16. I'll have the arugula and radicchio salad.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]15. I've got it all on the C drive.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]14. Unsweetened tea tastes better.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]13. Would you like your salmon poached or broiled?[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]12. My fiance, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]11. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="]10. Little Debbie snack cakes have too many fat grams.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 9. Checkmate.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 8. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 7. Does the salad bar have bean sprouts? [/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 6. Here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 5. I don't have a favorite college team.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 4. Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the side.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 3. I believe you cooked those soup beans too long.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 2. Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Darla.[/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
[FONT="] 1. Nope, no more for me. I'm drivin tonight. [/FONT]
Winter Woman
Well-Known Member
How Precious is This?
The photographer caught this special moment.
What a privilege to see.
Dirty Harry
Well-Known Member
Natures strategic bomber...It can hit your windshield three times.
Dirty Harry
Well-Known Member
I hope that was not a gas stove. Rip that flex connector you better move fast to stop it or just run.
Razztafarai
Well-Known Member
I've watched this 10 times!!! Cracks me up every time!!! 
[video=youtube;WxGS-2M6_5I]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WxGS-2M6_5I[/video]
[video=youtube;WxGS-2M6_5I]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WxGS-2M6_5I[/video]
dirtyho1968
Well-Known Member
Haha, pretty funny. Looks like a puppet.
Razztafarai
Well-Known Member
Haha! I have a dog but I love cats, they can be so weird!
I always imagine that cat in the vid saying "I must go... my people need me!"
I always imagine that cat in the vid saying "I must go... my people need me!"
Tenner
Well-Known Member
I think it had a real freaky tinge to it when it just went in that awkward shape lolHaha! I have a dog but I love cats, they can be so weird!
I always imagine that cat in the vid saying "I must go... my people need me!"
kush fario
Well-Known Member
bahahaha that car looks soo funny when it gets up the first time it almost looks human like the way it walks 
Tenner
Well-Known Member
Good stuff... good stuff!!bahahaha that car looks soo funny when it gets up the first time it almost looks human like the way it walks
ShadyStoner
New Member
[video=youtube;1LjPYG0JLmU]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1LjPYG0JLmU&feature=player_embedded[/video]
Richie LxP
Well-Known Member
......
Well-Known Member
that was fucking awesome