What's your opinion on spanking kids?

[RavenMochi]

lol, i think it's a great topic though honestly, and it almost seems to be taboo in todays world to be beating your kid, and i for one wondered why?
and i always love the kids that will say call a cop after you hit them, there's some crazy shit right there.. i could see me calling the cops after my mom hit me, lol.. she'd be telling me to call an ambulance while i was on the phone i'm sure, lol..

If my child ever threatens to call the cops for me beating her, my only reply will be, "If you can make it to that phone."

 

[Dankster4Life]

morgan lynn, you should check out this thread i posted awhile ago one night after i caught a neighborhood kid spray painting on another neighbors fence, and the same night my sister was walking in our town, and this group of kids threw soda and shit at her across the street, getting her all wet, and just basically scaring her for no good reason..
i was pissed about both of them, and came to the conclusion that i think a lot of kids are horrible today as their parents got away from spanking them when need be.. i don't think a kid should be beat 24/ 7 either, but there's some times in a kids life where they aren't respecting you and just need a general smack to bring them back to reality, lol..
i was beat as a kid, do i think i was abused?? hell's no.. do i think i deserved it at the time, 9 times out of 10 yes.. i hate the time out thing today, wtf is that?? i was afraid to be bad as a kid as i knew my mom wouldn't take any of my bs, nor should she have.. it seems a lot of parents today want to be their kids bff, and not a parent, but what do i know, i have none..

I agree with you some what.Thing we have to look at also about parents not doin any spanking is "should" those parents use that tactic.Lots of stupid parents out there that would only more than likely fuck up their kids for real by beating the shit out of them.I look at it like this.If a parent can't even sit down and speak to their kids in a decent manner they really shouldn't be putting their hands on them.If ya can't "talk"to your kids you more than likely can't keep it to just a spanking either.

 

[Morgan Lynn]

My parents never hit me, and to this day my friend's parents are actually scared by the way I behave around them.

They say I'm too polite and it makes them uncomfortable. I do not speak out of turn, remember pleases and thankyous (even if they tell me to just have what I want) ask permission before entering the fridge or leaving the house, come immediately when called etc

My mother sits down and puts her leg up and I take my cue to remove her boots for her. My dad walks him and I get up and make him a cup of coffee. No ifs, no buts, I do it.

On the very rare occasion that I do talk back if I think my parents are being genuinely unreasonable (they are very used to being unchallenged) their screaming or just 'the look' terrifies the fuck out of me. They do not need to hit me, I have seen them beat the shot out of eachother enough to know what they are capable of. The times my dad has tried to take a swing at me I bit him very hard, the last time I ran off for three days.

He realised he was totally in the wrong when I came back he apologised and life has been better.

I think spanking can teach a child the way to dominate others and get them to do what you want is to hit them. This behaviour is often carried into adulthood, and gets people into trouble.

But, that being said, it depends on the nature of the child and their own intrinsic sense of morality. Sometimes the only way to et through to them or perhaps stop them from doing something stupid in the moment is to strike them. Repeated, deliberate acts of destructiveness or defiance may need that kind of correction. But my brother and I have always been kids who it was not in our nature to consciously be bad when our parents weren't standing over us threatening. It's a good thing for a child to want to be good because it's nice to, not because they want to avoid punishment. Something needs to be instilled on the inside by parents.

Too much discipline leads to rebellion, and too little discipline results in recklessness. It's a difficult balance to maintain, and my mother had learned this after many years working in a school. Knowing my mama would go nuts If I arrived home at 8:45pm instead of 8:30 at the age of 17 only made me dread calling her to tell her if I'd be out late at all, which only worried her. He acknowledged it was stupid to get so angry and I acknowledged that regardless,I should have called her to let her know I was held up on the bs another 15 minutes. No screaming, no spanking, but it took 17 fucking years to reach that 0_o

It really depends in the child, their age, maturity, desire to please and level of compassion for others. I'd like to think some kids can learn to avoid displeasing others out of their own heart and not through fear of someone bigger hitting them.

I am by no means a perfect child- a short-tempered, potsmoking flirt- but I try. I know my parents love me, but if they took the step of hitting me, I would probably say 'fuck it' to my usual subservience towards them. That would be the last straw and I would have been a more rebellious teen.

They seemed to think I was some awful kid before I left and they missed me, what other kid runs around the house cooking and cleaning and removing boots without having to e told? X3

Do you do these things because you want to or because you have to?

 

[RavenMochi]

My parents never hit me, and to this day my friend's parents are actually scared by the way I behave around them.

They say I'm too polite and it makes them uncomfortable. I do not speak out of turn, remember pleases and thankyous (even if they tell me to just have what I want) ask permission before entering the fridge or leaving the house, come immediately when called etc

My mother sits down and puts her leg up and I take my cue to remove her boots for her. My dad walks him and I get up and make him a cup of coffee. No ifs, no buts, I do it.

On the very rare occasion that I do talk back if I think my parents are being genuinely unreasonable (they are very used to being unchallenged) their screaming or just 'the look' terrifies the fuck out of me. They do not need to hit me, I have seen them beat the shot out of eachother enough to know what they are capable of. The times my dad has tried to take a swing at me I bit him very hard, the last time I ran off for three days.

He realised he was totally in the wrong when I came back he apologised and life has been better.

I think spanking can teach a child the way to dominate others and get them to do what you want is to hit them. This behaviour is often carried into adulthood, and gets people into trouble.

But, that being said, it depends on the nature of the child and their own intrinsic sense of morality. Sometimes the only way to et through to them or perhaps stop them from doing something stupid in the moment is to strike them. Repeated, deliberate acts of destructiveness or defiance may need that kind of correction. But my brother and I have always been kids who it was not in our nature to consciously be bad when our parents weren't standing over us threatening. It's a good thing for a child to want to be good because it's nice to, not because they want to avoid punishment. Something needs to be instilled on the inside by parents.

Too much discipline leads to rebellion, and too little discipline results in recklessness. It's a difficult balance to maintain, and my mother had learned this after many years working in a school. Knowing my mama would go nuts If I arrived home at 8:45pm instead of 8:30 at the age of 17 only made me dread calling her to tell her if I'd be out late at all, which only worried her. He acknowledged it was stupid to get so angry and I acknowledged that regardless,I should have called her to let her know I was held up on the bs another 15 minutes. No screaming, no spanking, but it took 17 fucking years to reach that 0_o

It really depends in the child, their age, maturity, desire to please and level of compassion for others. I'd like to think some kids can learn to avoid displeasing others out of their own heart and not through fear of someone bigger hitting them.

I am by no means a perfect child- a short-tempered, potsmoking flirt- but I try. I know my parents love me, but if they took the step of hitting me, I would probably say 'fuck it' to my usual subservience towards them. That would be the last straw and I would have been a more rebellious teen.

They seemed to think I was some awful kid before I left and they missed me, what other kid runs around the house cooking and cleaning and removing boots without having to e told? X3

You are an EXCEPTIONALLY well behaved child. Note the word "exception." They should be grateful every breathing day they wake up and see you, I shit you not.

 

[ganjames]

yeah, you need to be careful becuase it could easily get out of hand...

...when your shitface drunk and had a rough day at work.

 

[RavenMochi]

Here's the thing. My daughter is a fighter. Seriously, she's got guts. And while it pisses me off because of her defiance, I would be lying if I said I wasn't proud of it. Because I know if she won't take shit from us, she won't take shit from anyone else. Funny thing is, when she goes to far and we get frustrated to the point of not knowing what to do, she gets all apologetic and gives us a hug, and tells us "its okay, its okay."

 

[racerboy71]

My parents never hit me, and to this day my friend's parents are actually scared by the way I behave around them.

They say I'm too polite and it makes them uncomfortable. I do not speak out of turn, remember pleases and thankyous (even if they tell me to just have what I want) ask permission before entering the fridge or leaving the house, come immediately when called etc

My mother sits down and puts her leg up and I take my cue to remove her boots for her. My dad walks him and I get up and make him a cup of coffee. No ifs, no buts, I do it.

On the very rare occasion that I do talk back if I think my parents are being genuinely unreasonable (they are very used to being unchallenged) their screaming or just 'the look' terrifies the fuck out of me. They do not need to hit me, I have seen them beat the shot out of eachother enough to know what they are capable of. The times my dad has tried to take a swing at me I bit him very hard, the last time I ran off for three days.

He realised he was totally in the wrong when I came back he apologised and life has been better.

I think spanking can teach a child the way to dominate others and get them to do what you want is to hit them. This behaviour is often carried into adulthood, and gets people into trouble.

But, that being said, it depends on the nature of the child and their own intrinsic sense of morality. Sometimes the only way to et through to them or perhaps stop them from doing something stupid in the moment is to strike them. Repeated, deliberate acts of destructiveness or defiance may need that kind of correction. But my brother and I have always been kids who it was not in our nature to consciously be bad when our parents weren't standing over us threatening. It's a good thing for a child to want to be good because it's nice to, not because they want to avoid punishment. Something needs to be instilled on the inside by parents.

Too much discipline leads to rebellion, and too little discipline results in recklessness. It's a difficult balance to maintain, and my mother had learned this after many years working in a school. Knowing my mama would go nuts If I arrived home at 8:45pm instead of 8:30 at the age of 17 only made me dread calling her to tell her if I'd be out late at all, which only worried her. He acknowledged it was stupid to get so angry and I acknowledged that regardless,I should have called her to let her know I was held up on the bs another 15 minutes. No screaming, no spanking, but it took 17 fucking years to reach that 0_o

It really depends in the child, their age, maturity, desire to please and level of compassion for others. I'd like to think some kids can learn to avoid displeasing others out of their own heart and not through fear of someone bigger hitting them.

I am by no means a perfect child- a short-tempered, potsmoking flirt- but I try. I know my parents love me, but if they took the step of hitting me, I would probably say 'fuck it' to my usual subservience towards them. That would be the last straw and I would have been a more rebellious teen.

They seemed to think I was some awful kid before I left and they missed me, what other kid runs around the house cooking and cleaning and removing boots without having to e told? X3

it's always nice when a kid is respectful and all, but we all know that not everyone is like that, and a lot of kids and parents don't seem to get a long for what ever reason..
my one sisters kid has always been very fresh since he has been a lil kid, and he is going to be a senior this year, and he is not like wine, and hasn't gotten any better with age... just lil things, like he has always called my mom, his grand mom by her first name, would like walk in the house and say whats up weezie, my mom's like nickname. always talking back to his mother and father, etc..
then my other sister kid couldn't be any more different, totally loves his gmom, doesn't talk back, cuts her lawn in the summer and helps her out pretty good..

 

[xKuroiTaimax]

Like I said, every kid is different.

I can be far too eager to please and get trample on but I also share my mother's feisty spark. Push me too far and I will snap, as you've seen in one or two venomous forum posts and when I bit my dad ^^;

Of course I still do things that are considered 'wrong' like smoking pot, because I like them, but I talked it through with my mother. She was impressed by my maturity and let's me smoke as long as she doesn't see it.

Now, doing something bad that hurts someone like stealing, cussing at/teasing someone for no reason, being rude to my parents when they're just stressed or trying to get stuff done- that kind of deliberate destructive behavior is just really sad to see.

I think I choose to behave when with strangers or just where my parents are absent because there are things I think it is just wrong to do and I'd feel guilty even if no one punished me for it.

But there are plenty if things I have done thy my parents did not approve of, like my stretched piercing, but those sort of things we try to talk out now, instead of having me cowering under a desk with daddy holding me by the collar.

I think making a child understand the negative consequences of their actions on others will help them choose to be good in their unguided adult future, whether or not they were born with a particularly benevolent nature.

 

[smokinheavy79]

You gotta "beat" your kids, or they will eventually be beating you! hahahaha going to spank mine now hahaha

 

[Morgan Lynn]

I'm watching my son and my niece right now and all I have to say is one of these kids are going out the damn window if they don't stop fighting.

 

[racerboy71]

I'm watching my son and my niece right now and all I have to say is one of these kids are going out the damn window if they don't stop fighting.

i watch my one sisters kid all of the time, and he's a pretty good kid over all, 13 now, but i'd think about throwing my other sister's kid out of a window if i were around him too long.. i don't like fresh mouths on kids, it's so not attractive, lol..

 

[ganjames]

if anyone feels bad about beating their kids i can do it for a small fee..


now this is where i hijack your thread morgan, and i apologize in advance. how would you feel if you found out someone else hit your kid? even if it wasn't hard and they deserved it.

 

[Morgan Lynn]

if anyone feels bad about beating their kids i can do it for a small fee..


now this is where i hijack your thread morgan, and i apologize in advance. how would you feel if you found out someone else hit your kid? even if it wasn't hard and they deserved it.

It depends. I would probably accept it if he really deserved a spanking. If they hit him on his face I'd go ape shit.

 

[Dankster4Life]

They become what they are around from what i have learned.


Ravin may i ask how old yours is?

 

[medicalmaryjane]

i don't think i would spank if i had kids. my dog can be quite bad and i don't spank him. i think i would feel worse about myself if i spanked someone. i don't judge anyone else for doign it, i've had it happen to me, it builds resent and i wouldn't want to be hated by my children. i am old and i still have bad feelings for my mother. remember that next time you spank lol.

i wouldn't have kids so i am not too worried about good parenting. i would never spank my niece or nephews in a million years. i want to be the nice aunt who spoils them.

 

[racerboy71]

if anyone feels bad about beating their kids i can do it for a small fee..


now this is where i hijack your thread morgan, and i apologize in advance. how would you feel if you found out someone else hit your kid? even if it wasn't hard and they deserved it.

i have hit my one nephew, the one who's here all of the time, but he doesn't have a father figure in his life, so i kind of took that responsibility on myself.. so even though he's my sisters kid, i am extremely close with him and feel like i'm the closest thing he has to a father so i think it's different situation altogether.. i'd never hit my other sisters son, no matter how much i feel like it on days..

 

[racerboy71]

i don't think i would spank if i had kids. my dog can be quite bad and i don't spank him. i think i would feel worse about myself if i spanked someone. i don't judge anyone else for doign it, i've had it happen to me, it builds resent and i wouldn't want to be hated by my children. i am old and i still have bad feelings for my mother. remember that next time you spank lol.

i wouldn't have kids so i am not too worried about good parenting. i would never spank my niece or nephews in a million years. i want to be the nice aunt who spoils them.

lol, i'm the most loved uncle for my nephew and i spoil the shit out of him.. i don't know how many ipods and what not i've bought the kid over the years, but i'm also not going to let him walk over me.. and what he did was pretty off the hook, called out of school and had some friends over and they were all drinking and smoking and shit.. he was in 7th grade at the time..

 

[ganjames]

i'm talking about a teacher at school, a daycare worker or a worker at a latchkey program for after school. someone non-related.

 

[xKuroiTaimax]

I'm watching my son and my niece right now and all I have to say is one of these kids are going out the damn window if they don't stop fighting.

What they fighting over?

Whoever's in the wrong needs to be told. They both need to know their behaviour is disturbing and upsetting you. It's not all about their grievances, you need your peace and quiet too!

I don't know if they're old enough to understand that though.

I'm probably not in a position to offer parenting advice. My mam had me at nineteen, but in retrospect I'd rather she was a disciplinarian than being a typical young mother with few boundaries.

But then again, how much is nature and how much nurture? My grandma is very good natured but a party animal and my mama was the complete opposite, keeping an eye on her in bars at 14.

To answer the later question, if my kid did something they knew was wrong and hurtful, not showing remorse, especially if they were showing disrespect towards the person that hit them, then I guess I'd be fine with it.

But I hope I wouldn't raise a kid who would need that correction, and hope it would be a trusted adut who has their best interest in mind too and spanked them because they thought it appropriate and I would have to in that instance. I'd just rather it not come to that.

 

[Prefontaine]

i'm indifferent about spanking.

I don't think a child under 1 should be spanked and i don't think a child over 10 should be spanked. Also, parents/caregivers should be cautious on the severity of their spanking because it can easily get out of hand.

I think spanking is a win/lose type of deal, but when children don't listen for shit and they aren't learning, what the hell do you do?

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