FUCKING FUCKER.
So after weeks of calling again, Mr Hot and Cold says he finally realizes he's been dating crazy bitches (which he has, they always break his heart) and that he would like to see me tonight.
So I get in the bath for 3 hours, feel for a moment I'm worth the expensive soaps and body butter. Get my hair done etc.
We were texting while I was in the bath and stuff. Everything seemed fine.
As I type I'm in my red garter belt, black stockings and polkadot undies. I've missed out on all the New Year's Day family shows on the one day my dad is around for the night while I was getting ready for him...
AND THE FUCKER SUDDENLY TEXTS ME TO SAY HE IS TOO HUNGOVER TO SEE ME.
FUCK.
NOT AGAIN.
EVERY SINGLE DAMN FUCKING TIME. I knew it wasn't worth the bother. Just have to sheepishly get changed, go downstairs and tell my mother I'll be in tonight after all.
It's a fucking slap in the face, like something telling me 'who the fuck do you think you are, no one wants you.' I feel stupid making myself look all nice for him.
It's always fucking me that gets stood up, or they forget I exist the next day or flat out reject me in the first place. You know what, the last option seems the least painful now.
FUCK IT.
/Rant
Morning Kuroi-chan, Happiest New Year to you sweetheart!
First off, I would like to apologize on behalf of my gender. What an inconsiderate jerk! Nobody deserves that. Men are so stupid sometimes. Our egos are so fragile that we'll take any chance we can get to fortify it. I know you must feel foolish because you thought he cared about you. I hope you know that my criticisms of him aren't tacit criticism of your judgment. I think you're great, and from what I know about you, I think your beautiful inside and out.
The fact that he called you bitching about the 'crazy girls' he's dated should've been a red flag. Us guys don't have the same social network that women have, because we aren't as open with our feelings with our friends. so when we get our little feelings hurt, we don't have anyone to talk to and we keep it all inside.... OR we keep a girl around in our front pocket that we can unload on when we need a shoulder to cry on or an easy lay.
At the very least, he doesn't appreciate you. Have you ever told him the stuff you tell us? About how you feel about him and about how excited you get when he says he wants to see you?
I bet you that the day you decide to assert yourself by leaving him is the day he realizes what he gonna lose.
I mean what's he waiting for? If he hasn't committed to you yet, he's might just be playing you.
I'm sorry if I'm being too blunt, but I hate seeing someone I care about being taken advantage of. The only thing wrong with you is your self-image. You're a smoking hottie, you're smart, you're loyal to your man and you smoke weed. I'm ot exaggerating when I say that if there is such thing as a perfect woman, you have the potential to be it. No lie.
He's just one guy mija, and you're SOOO young still... Just cause one jerk can't see what he's got, doesn't make you unlovable. Keep your heap above water and keep chugging on!
It's not gonna be easy, but once you move on, you'll be much better off. I honestly believe things happen for a reason. If it wasn't meant to be with him, it because there's something better down the line. It's a new year, and it's time for a new perspective!
I know that most likely nothing I say will change much inside you, but I just wanted you to know that me, a REAL person, thinks you're awesome just the way you are. Peace and love sweetheart

Chin up. We love you.