Favorite stupid joke...?

G

gioua

Well-Known Member
Mine has to be... a Little Johnny one..

Little Johnny is dressed as a pirate for Halloween. As he is making his rounds through the neighborhood, he approaches a ladies front door and yells, “Trick or treat!”
The lady says, “Oh, I see you’re a pirate. Where are your BUCCANEERS?
Little Johnny responds, “Underneath my BUCKIN’ HAT!



 
charface

charface

Well-Known Member
The teacher pointed to the metal rooster on the roof in a book they were reading and asked if anyone knew
what it was.
Johnny replied, Thats a cock

Thats correct answered the teacher.
Do you know why they use a cock for a weather vein?

Johnny proudly exclaimed. "Because if they used a cunt the wind would whistle tough through it!"
 
charface

charface

Well-Known Member
My fav joke is this one.

A dude in the bar spilled his drink on his shirt and started freaking.

Bartender asked wtf homie?

Well explained the guy my wife is going to kick me out for good if she finds out I`ve drank yet again.

The tender laughs as he deals with these problems daily.
Here is what you do. Put a 20 in your shirt pocket and tell her someone at the office party spilled
on your shirt and gave you the 20 to cover the cleaning.

Much releived the drunkard continued to get plastered and headed home to sleep it off.

Morning comes to find his wife insane, throwing his shit out of the house etc..

He told her to calm down and he explained the spill and the 20 in the pocket.

She yelled there was 40 in the pocket to which he replied.

Oh yeah ,,, He shit my pants too.
 
cannabineer

cannabineer

Ursus marijanus
Q: How do you top a car?
A: Tep on the brake, Tupid.

Q: How do you catch a unique rabbit?
A: Unique up on him.
Q2: How do you catch a tame rabbit?
A2: Tame way; unique up on him. cn
 
charface

charface

Well-Known Member
Whats red sits in a tree and says meow meow?
A mentally retarded apple.

And yes before you get pissed I`m 1/2 retarded on my mothers side
 
racerboy71

racerboy71

bud bootlegger
here's s dumb knock knock favorite of mine..

knock knock..
who's there?
interrupting cow..
then as the person is saying interrupting cow who, you say...
mooo... :D
 
Hepheastus420

Hepheastus420

Well-Known Member
I've said this one a billion times here but here it goes again..

There's two cannibals eating a clown. One cannibal looks at the other and asks "does this taste funny to you".

I'd tell you guys the joke about the pizza, but it's too cheesy.
 
cannabineer

cannabineer

Ursus marijanus
I nailed an 8-year-old with this one a coupla months ago. Oh his face was a keeper.

Knock knock.
(Who's there?)
I eep.


:hump: cn
 
bobtokes

bobtokes

Well-Known Member
bloke goes to the doctors
"doc i keep breaking my leg in the same place"

doctor "well don't go there again"
 
MrFrance

MrFrance

Well-Known Member
A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only clingfilm for shorts.
The shrink says, "Well, I can clearly see you're nuts."
 
cannabineer

cannabineer

Ursus marijanus
Olga:
You know Irina ... lately I have been seeing spots.
Irina:
Oh Olga, that's not good. Have you seen a doctor?
Olga:
No Irina; so far, just ... spots.

cn
 
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