Ok, ok! Y'all caught me white-handed. I been pulling the pud around the green ladies. I couldn't help it. They smell so intoxicating. Plus, I heard semen contains some sort of nutrient, so I wanted to see if I could get bigger buds............Nah, but that was funny though, wasn't it? I bet some of y'all were like, "he did what????" I don't beat the meat around the ladies. That wouldn't be any bueno at all. I've already settled on the notion that it was an "Avian-American" bird who is guarding my plants against the vermin who dare attack. I think he's expecting me to break bread with him when I harvest. That's laughable. Just cause you fight off bugs don't mean I owe you anything. That's what you were born to do. I don't get paid to exist. Goddamn birds. Always thinking they can get one over on someone......Oh, wait. Y'all are still here. Oops. Incessant ramblings of a stoned idiot with ADD. LMAO!