That
beyondchronic.com site is awesome, thanks for the lead. OK, I was under sedation for 11 hours during surgery to resect a large brain tumor that had been growing for several years. The doc who discovered it sent me to the ER at Porter and put together a neurosurgery team to do an emergency surgery. The lead surgeon told me that they were amazed that I was alive as the size and location he said "does not support life." I got the third string surgeon, as the top guy, whose name is on the neurosurgery practice, and his partner were both on vacation, so the back up doctor got to do his first cranium opening on me. I looked him up online afterwards and found that he taught med students how to do this in Belgium,
on cadavers. While I was under they lost me and I had to be "revived", had my heart restarted twice. What I experienced was similar to what I have seen described by people who had near death experiences, I was in a dark place, like a big room, alone except for a voice, but not a sound, like a voice talking to me, telling me that it is not my time to go yet. I could see a light coming from an arched doorway, and the light was a different color, like veiled, bronze tinted light, almost like tinted glass with moving objects, like people walking in a grassy area of a park or a field on the other side, but I couldn't see thru the doorway clearly, it looked like an old impressionist painting because it was not clear. I had no pain or fear, in fact I am not sure how it is that I was moving toward the doorway without pain as my old injuries always ache. I got the distinct impression that the person tending the gateway was working for someone else and that there is some big 'thing' going on, like maybe a war between good and evil, and that my micro-role in the saga was not yet played out, so a moment later I woke up with a breathing tube down my throat and a mission in my head to be a good husband and father. Everything else is pretty standard, the doctor was yelling at me asking me if I could swallow and I struggled to try and get the tube out of my throat, which he extracted, a very long plastic pipe. I saw my arm raised up and realized that I could not bring it down by the normal method, but reached up with my other hand and brought it down. That side has been numb since the surgery. What I can bring to others about what I saw is that there is another side and that it looks like we retain something after we depart our bodies upon death. I think that my being sent back from the edge was in part to relate what I saw. The relevance to my life has been that I no longer fear death, it will come when it will, and it's OK. There is a truth to the famous quote that "you don't have a soul, you are a soul and you have a body." My grade 2 tumor was a GTR, gross total resection and I had 6 weeks of radiation to prevent it from growing back, so I should be fine except for some nerve damage and the very weird aspect of my brain growing to fill the quite large void, so I actually am 'expanding my consciousness'. Sorry to go long on this, but hey, you asked! I don't take any meds since the heavy meds right after surgery. After a few weeks of those, followed by a few blood pressure regulators and some Prevacid I swore them off and deal with pain using natural methods supplemented by beer, MMJ and, well, that's pretty much it. Sorry to hear about your dad Kramer, send me a PM if you would like to chat sometime, those medicines that affect our brain chemistry are a lot stronger and have more side effects than most folks realize. I suggest trying to minimize their use and use more natural methods. This seems like an odd place to put this information, but hey, after seeing that MMJ may actually have anti-cancer properties, I see that God has a sense of humor, so there you go!
