hatred for being an atheist

[Hepheastus420]

I've mentioned not really believing in god before, but today I mentioned how I'm an atheist to my parents while talking about religion. I didn't want to lie about a belief in god, so I let them know. My dad shared his religious views. He told me not to worry too much, but I'm not supposed to deny god. He also said nobody knows and that he questions it too. BUT I'm still not supposed to deny god. My mom was just very disappointed. Kept saying it was her FAULT (which means she finds a fault in me too) because she didn't take me to church as a kid. She said she should have done better. Not many people can get to me, but that one hurt. I feel like shit right now honestly. Starting to think I may end up in hell and eat my words. I wouldn't consider this hatred as I've experienced true hate due to my lack of belief, but this really hit me in a bad way. Just wondering if anybody else has gone through something like this either from family or a close friend. I honestly don't care if I offend a strangers beliefs, but when my own mom is truly disappointed in me, well it sucks!

“Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword.

For I have come to turn

“‘a man against his father,
a daughter against her mother,
a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law—
a man’s enemies will be the members of his own household.

“Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. Whoever does not take up their cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.

 

[NorthofEngland]

That's how Christianity perpetuates itself. Family and peer pressure to accept the indoctrination of a bronze age system of middle eastern superstitions. For people who actually do start to study Christianity it's not long before large sections of it's history and the Bible are revealed to them as hate filled and hateful. The Westboro Baptist Church is probably the closest, in belief and attitude, to Churches of the past. ALSO try to read about PASCALS WAGER.

 

[Beefbisquit]

I've mentioned not really believing in god before, but today I mentioned how I'm an atheist to my parents while talking about religion. I didn't want to lie about a belief in god, so I let them know. My dad shared his religious views. He told me not to worry too much, but I'm not supposed to deny god. He also said nobody knows and that he questions it too. BUT I'm still not supposed to deny god. My mom was just very disappointed. Kept saying it was her FAULT (which means she finds a fault in me too) because she didn't take me to church as a kid. She said she should have done better. Not many people can get to me, but that one hurt. I feel like shit right now honestly. Starting to think I may end up in hell and eat my words. I wouldn't consider this hatred as I've experienced true hate due to my lack of belief, but this really hit me in a bad way. Just wondering if anybody else has gone through something like this either from family or a close friend. I honestly don't care if I offend a strangers beliefs, but when my own mom is truly disappointed in me, well it sucks!

“Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword.

For I have come to turn

“‘a man against his father,
a daughter against her mother,
a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law—
a man’s enemies will be the members of his own household.

“Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. Whoever does not take up their cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.

Imagine believing something so steadily that it terrified you.

Your mom is brainwashed. It makes sense that she would react the way she did considering the penalties she thinks you will endure in the afterlife.


Next time you talk about god with your rents, try not denying god, but just stating that until you are convinced an entity exists you can't have a belief; it just doesn't work. It would be a false belief. Does pretending to think Santa is real around children make you actually have a belief in Santa? No, and pretending to believe in god while in Church isn't going to give you a belief in god either. For people who require evidence before belief, there's nothing short seeing evidence that will cause them to form a belief. No amount of old books, that have been translated dozens of times and were never written first hand by anyone who witnessed anything, in a time when 'disease' was god's pestilence, will make someone who values evidence/logic/the truth, believe in such things.

Ask your mom why she's not a Muslim or a Hindu, or why she doesn't believe in witchcraft or Voodoo... when she can answer your questions, she should be able to understand why you're not a Christian.

 

[GreyLord]

Yeah N of E is right. My family has disowned me since I stopped believing a man-made religion that's been compiled from many various sources. Watch Zeitgeist. Even better read 'The Bible Fraud' by Tony Bushby. Both are eye-openers.

 

[CC Dobbs]

I hate you too and I'm an atheist. If mom has a closed mind to any other opinion but the one she was taught then you cannot help but disappoint her. Everybody will be better because of this.

 

[Moldy]

Hold your head up and be proud you don't believe in talking snakes and shit. Don't let them wear you down. You have science on your side. You have truth and a good mind since your reasoning is sharper and uncompromising. Tell them you done worshiping the sky fairy and to quit with the fairy tales. Maybe you can convince them to put down that dirty book... the bible.

Go to this site and read a few quotes from Dawkins. It will improve your confidence.

http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/r/richard_dawkins.html

 

[Hepheastus420]

Imagine believing something so steadily that it terrified you.

Your mom is brainwashed. It makes sense that she would react the way she did considering the penalties she thinks you will endure in the afterlife.


Next time you talk about god with your rents, try not denying god, but just stating that until you are convinced an entity exists you can't have a belief; it just doesn't work. It would be a false belief. Does pretending to think Santa is real around children make you actually have a belief in Santa? No, and pretending to believe in god while in Church isn't going to give you a belief in god either. For people who require evidence before belief, there's nothing short seeing evidence that will cause them to form a belief. No amount of old books, that have been translated dozens of times and were never written first hand by anyone who witnessed anything, in a time when 'disease' was god's pestilence, will make someone who values evidence/logic/the truth, believe in such things.

Ask your mom why she's not a Muslim or a Hindu, or why she doesn't believe in witchcraft or Voodoo... when she can answer your questions, she should be able to understand why you're not a Christian.

Yeah I get what you're saying. If I truly believed in god and hell, I'd be sad to see my kid (if I had a kid) not believe in him.. knowing he will one day go to hell. It's a very sad thought. I don't believe the stories in the bible, but even now, I feel guilty. I don't know why, it's not even a fear of hell.. just guilt.

I'm very respectful when I talk to them about religion. So I let them know that I do not know much. And that they COULD be right, I could be wrong. But still, I just can't believe. They didn't get mad, my dad agreed with alot of what I had to say. My mom was just very saddened. I have asked why they believe in jesus, but not anybody else. They just tell me that's the way they were raised. She is stubborn, in a nice way.

I was venting yesterday, but today I feel even worse. The guilt is building again. Do any of you guys ever feel guilty for being an atheist? I'm stuck in the middle. I can not believe in the stories from the bible.. or any other religion that I've looked into. But I still have slight worries about what will happen when I die. If I should listen to the bible. It wasn't beaten into me as a kid, they raised their four kids without forcing it on us. Never took us to church, not even for holidays. Never read the bible to us, never bought a bible for us. I just know I was much happier when I had faith.

It was weird for me to hear my dad agree with alot of what I said. Him agreeing with me made me feel like I was crushing him, taking away his comfort blanket. I feel like shit when they say they believe in god, because I can't stop thinking in my mind how they CAN believe. I feel guilty when decent points against the bible are made. I wish this feeling would go away. I don't think it will though.

 

[Beefbisquit]

Yeah I get what you're saying. If I truly believed in god and hell, I'd be sad to see my kid (if I had a kid) not believe in him.. knowing he will one day go to hell. It's a very sad thought. I don't believe the stories in the bible, but even now, I feel guilty. I don't know why, it's not even a fear of hell.. just guilt.

I'm very respectful when I talk to them about religion. So I let them know that I do not know much. And that they COULD be right, I could be wrong. But still, I just can't believe. They didn't get mad, my dad agreed with alot of what I had to say. My mom was just very saddened. I have asked why they believe in jesus, but not anybody else. They just tell me that's the way they were raised. She is stubborn, in a nice way.

I was venting yesterday, but today I feel even worse. The guilt is building again. Do any of you guys ever feel guilty for being an atheist? I'm stuck in the middle. I can not believe in the stories from the bible.. or any other religion that I've looked into. But I still have slight worries about what will happen when I die. If I should listen to the bible. It wasn't beaten into me as a kid, they raised their four kids without forcing it on us. Never took us to church, not even for holidays. Never read the bible to us, never bought a bible for us. I just know I was much happier when I had faith.

It was weird for me to hear my dad agree with alot of what I said. Him agreeing with me made me feel like I was crushing him, taking away his comfort blanket. I feel like shit when they say they believe in god, because I can't stop thinking in my mind how they CAN believe. I feel guilty when decent points against the bible are made. I wish this feeling would go away. I don't think it will though.

Your guilt is misplaced.

It's normal to want to please your parents, but you have to stop living in their paradigm. Maybe you just shouldn't talk about religion with them if it makes you feel guilty?


Personally, when I was first exploring atheism I would get panicked sometimes when I thought about what if god really exists; but I got over it eventually. I don't walk around hoping to not run into black cats, or avoiding ladders, and I don't walk around worrying about what an invisible person that has yet to prove they exist, thinks about me or what I'm doing.

Everything fades with time.

 

[Hepheastus420]

Your guilt is misplaced.

It's normal to want to please your parents, but you have to stop living in their paradigm. Maybe you just shouldn't talk about religion with them if it makes you feel guilty?


Personally, when I was first exploring atheism I would get panicked sometimes when I thought about what if god really exists; but I got over it eventually. I don't walk around hoping to not run into black cats, or avoiding ladders, and I don't walk around worrying about what an invisible person that has yet to prove they exist, thinks about me or what I'm doing.

Everything fades with time.

I believe I feel bad because I want to believe so badly, but I can't. Yup, that's it. Thank you for your answers beef. and yeah, now that they know my beliefs, I'm just gonna let it rest and hopefully they'll grow to accept it. I'm sure they'll be fine the next time I talk to them. Dude, seriously, thanks for helping clear this up in my head. My guilt is going away again, I'm feeling better. And I hadn't really thought of religion the same way as avoiding ladders and such. Every once in a while when I go under a ladder, the thought pops in my head, but I don't worry about it. I just understand it's a superstition for some. I'm going to view religion the same way now. I'm realizing now that I don't fear the bible, nor do I worry about what will happen. The guilt comes from thinking I should believe, but I simply don't. So now I'm just gonna relax and wait for any leftover feelings to go away. thanks!

 

[Beefbisquit]

I believe I feel bad because I want to believe so badly, but I can't. Yup, that's it. Thank you for your answers beef. and yeah, now that they know my beliefs, I'm just gonna let it rest and hopefully they'll grow to accept it. I'm sure they'll be fine the next time I talk to them. Dude, seriously, thanks for helping clear this up in my head. My guilt is going away again, I'm feeling better. And I hadn't really thought of religion the same way as avoiding ladders and such. Every once in a while when I go under a ladder, the thought pops in my head, but I don't worry about it. I just understand it's a superstition for some. I'm going to view religion the same way now. I'm realizing now that I don't fear the bible, nor do I worry about what will happen. The guilt comes from thinking I should believe, but I simply don't. So now I'm just gonna relax and wait for any leftover feelings to go away. thanks!

No problem, homie! We've all been there.

 

[tyler.durden]

Hey, Hep! Sorry you had to go through that, but your immediate family is the most challenging when it comes to your atheism. I went through it with them when I was like 16, so we got it out of the way early. When my son was born, it was more difficult: I instructed them not to bring instill any magical thinking in him; no Santa, magic, Disney, god or jesus. They went fucking nuts, crying, yelling, the whole nine yards. But, they got used to it. Now, my kid is having a hell of a time in school trying to fit in to a social group. He's great looking, smart, funny and talented, but ever since they found out he was an atheist a couple years ago, they pick on him and exclude him from things. His school is 95% WASP kids, and the rest are jews. They're are only three atheists in his school. I do feel guilty from time to time having raised my son atheist in light of the trouble he's having, but I think it's better and healthier in the long run. I reassure him that when he hits HS soon, he will meet a lot more like minded people there. But BB's right, time will smooth this over. Glad you're feeling better, keep your chin up, my friend...

 

[Chief Walkin Eagle]

When I was going through some tough times my grandma came to talk to me and she scheduled a meeting with her priest to talk to me. I very politely told her that I would get no comfort or guidance from a priest and thats when she piped up and said "Jesus is the only way!". I told her I couldnt believe that and I briefly and respectfully explained why and I could see her eyes fill with tears while I was explaining. She was more hurt about me rejecting Christianity than the troubles I was going through, she didnt argue with me though, she was just heart broken that Im apparently going to spend eternity burning in hell. I still love my grandma though... For me, its hard to feel guilty when someone thinks about you like that. That many of your loved ones deserve to burn in hell because they share different beliefs. So I felt no guilt. I also had this beef with fundamental Christianity ever since my mid teens and it kept growing through the years. I just hate how Christianity has destroyed our culture and now most of my people are Christian. My story isnt really relevant to your situation but I thought it was worth saying lol.

 

[sunni]

hep you and i have been great friends.

athetist , buddhist, christian, catholic, ect ect everyone imho should be able ot believe what they wanna believe, and everyone should feel they are right.
they will come to terms with it love will over come the issue.

Hey, Hep! Sorry you had to go through that, but your immediate family is the most challenging when it comes to your atheism. I went through it with them when I was like 16, so we got it out of the way early. When my son was born, it was more difficult: I instructed them not to bring instill any magical thinking in him; no Santa, magic, Disney, god or jesus. They went fucking nuts, crying, yelling, the whole nine yards. But, they got used to it. Now, my kid is having a hell of a time in school trying to fit in to a social group. He's great looking, smart, funny and talented, but ever since they found out he was an atheist a couple years ago, they pick on him and exclude him from things. His school is 95% WASP kids, and the rest are jews. They're are only three atheists in his school. I do feel guilty from time to time having raised my son atheist in light of the trouble he's having, but I think it's better and healthier in the long run. I reassure him that when he hits HS soon, he will meet a lot more like minded people there. But BB's right, time will smooth this over. Glad you're feeling better, keep your chin up, my friend...

while i may not truly believe in god or whatever i wouldnt ever deny my children the right to santa or christmas, or disney...

do you feel maybe you took away the CHILD from your children? imaginations and magic are wonderful things.

 

[tyler.durden]

while i may not truly believe in god or whatever i wouldnt ever deny my children the right to santa or christmas, or disney...

do you feel maybe you took away the CHILD from your children? imaginations and magic are wonderful things.

Hey, Sunni. My boy has always had an amazing imagination, and he still LOVES christmas: the food, presents, the decor, the warmth of gathering family and friends. He has also liked the santa claus myth. The only difference is that my child knew the difference between reality and fantasy, but this didn't take away from his love of fantasy and pretending. I don't know why most adults equate bullshit, lies and magical thinking with childhood. Imagination is not dependent on any of these things. It seems to me the children that are inundated with bullshit as reality spend the rest of their lives attempting to overcome it, and we can see how it hampers their cognitive and critical thinking abilities through adulthood. There are so many beautiful, wonderful and amazing aspects of our world and the cosmos for our children to fathom, I don't see the need for inferior and silly false realities adults impose on children. Maybe I'm missing something...

 

[sunni]

Hey, Sunni. My boy has always had an amazing imagination, and he still LOVES christmas: the food, presents, the decor, the warmth of gathering family and friends. He has also liked the santa claus myth. The only difference is that my child knew the difference between reality and fantasy, but this didn't take away from his love of fantasy and pretending. I don't know why most adults equate bullshit, lies and magical thinking with childhood. Imagination is not dependent on any of these things. It seems to me the children that are inundated with bullshit as reality spend the rest of their lives attempting to overcome it, and we can see how it hampers their cognitive and critical thinking abilities through adulthood. There are so many beautiful, wonderful and amazing aspects of our world and the cosmos for our children to fathom, I don't see the need for inferior and silly false realities adults impose on children. Maybe I'm missing something...

ok you made it seem in your original post that hes like banned from anything like that .you still introduce it but he just knows the adult version however still enjoys it like the rest of us than im okay with that and that is just fine and dandy however banning a child from anything like those kinda things i think is slightly wrong

 

[tyler.durden]

ok you made it seem in your original post that hes like banned from anything like that .you still introduce it but he just knows the adult version however still enjoys it like the rest of us than im okay with that and that is just fine and dandy however banning a child from anything like those kinda things i think is slightly wrong

Well, as long as you're okay with it

 

[Jack Harer]

hep you and i have been great friends.

athetist , buddhist, christian, catholic, ect ect everyone imho should be able ot believe what they wanna believe, and everyone should feel they are right.
they will come to terms with it love will over come the issue.



while i may not truly believe in god or whatever i wouldnt ever deny my children the right to santa or christmas, or disney...

do you feel maybe you took away the CHILD from your children? imaginations and magic are wonderful things.

Very well said Sunni!

Hephaestus, the very guilt you are experience is a product of religion. It's one of the control mechanisms. We all have to find our own beliefs. It is MY opinion that religion is a man-made concept used to control man. We're indoctrinated from birth to believe in the religion of our parents, and taught that it is blasphemy to question it. As were our parents, and theirs before them.
Spirituality on the other hand, is an entirely different matter. Good luck. You've done nothing wrong to feel guilt for.

 

[fg2020]

People who think that they are going to live forever have never given a second thought to just how long a time that actually is.

 

[SeniorFrostyKush]

Belief in the whimsical is part of what makes childhood such a magical period in our lives. I can't imagine if my parents had stolen those things away from me at such a young age. I remember my mom yelling at my older cousins, when they told me there was no santa when I was 5. My aunt and uncle are devout Christians who also do no agree with letting there kids experience childhood for all that its worth. Although your son is a smart, well adjusted, young man, he missed out on so much of what makes childhood, childhood. Imagination has nothing to do with the issue at hand. The real issue is that your son has missed out on a CRUCIAL understanding that developes within us all at an early age, and that is the REALITY that anything is possible within the universe that we live in. This is something children have an acute understanding of, and is strengthened and reinforced by the fun and whimsical worlds that we've created for them to enjoy and take part in. It's only later on in life, that our own hardships, coupled with the beliefs of society at large, that brainwash us into forgetting what we've all known since a young age. This is not a dig at anyone, however, it is my personal belief that atheism should not be taught to children. If a parent is an atheist, I believe that they should choose to forgo conveying those beliefs on their child. Most religions teach and indoctrinate their children, with the belief that doing so, will ensure the safe passage and continuation of their children's souls into the afterlife. Since atheists have no such concerns, I don't see why there would be any reason to force these beliefs onto a child. Believe it or not, these are very bleak and scary concepts for a child to comprehend.

 

[Beefbisquit]

Belief in the whimsical is part of what makes childhood such a magical period in our lives. I can't imagine if my parents had stolen those things away from me at such a young age. I remember my mom yelling at my older cousins, when they told me there was no santa when I was 5. My aunt and uncle are devout Christians who also do no agree with letting there kids experience childhood for all that its worth. Although your son is a smart, well adjusted, young man, he missed out on so much of what makes childhood, childhood. Imagination has nothing to do with the issue at hand. The real issue is that your son has missed out on a CRUCIAL understanding that developes within us all at an early age, and that is the REALITY that anything is possible within the universe that we live in. This is something children have an acute understanding of, and is strengthened and reinforced by the fun and whimsical worlds that we've created for them to enjoy and take part in. It's only later on in life, that our own hardships, coupled with the beliefs of society at large, that brainwash us into forgetting what we've all known since a young age. This is not a dig at anyone, however, it is my personal belief that atheism should not be taught to children. If a parent is an atheist, I believe that they should choose to forgo conveying those beliefs on their child. Most religions teach and indoctrinate their children, with the belief that doing so, will ensure the safe passage and continuation of their children's souls into the afterlife. Since atheists have no such concerns, I don't see why there would be any reason to force these beliefs onto a child. Believe it or not, these are very bleak and scary concepts for a child to comprehend.

If a child never knows the fear of a religion, how would they ever know what they're missing?