[FONT="]HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT[/FONT]
[FONT="]The following is an actual question given on a[/FONT]
[FONT="]University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The[/FONT]
[FONT="]answer by one student was so "profound" that the[/FONT]
[FONT="]professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet,[/FONT]
[FONT="]which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of[/FONT]
[FONT="]enjoying it as well.[/FONT]
[FONT="]Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or[/FONT]
[FONT="]endothermic (absorbs heat)?[/FONT]
[FONT="]Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs[/FONT]
[FONT="]using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats[/FONT]
[FONT="]when it is compressed) or some variant.[/FONT]
[FONT="]One student, however, wrote the following:[/FONT]
[FONT="]First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is[/FONT]
[FONT="]changing in time.[/FONT]
[FONT="]So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving[/FONT]
[FONT="]into Hell and t he rate at which they are leaving. I[/FONT]
[FONT="]think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets[/FONT]
[FONT="]to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are[/FONT]
[FONT="]leaving.[/FONT]
[FONT="]As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at[/FONT]
[FONT="]the different religions that exist in the world today.[/FONT]
[FONT="]Most of these religions state that if you are not a[/FONT]
[FONT="]member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since[/FONT]
[FONT="]there is more than one of these religions and since[/FONT]
[FONT="]people do not belong to more than one religion, we can[/FONT]
[FONT="]project that all souls go to Hell.[/FONT]
[FONT="]With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect[/FONT]
[FONT="]the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.[/FONT]
[FONT="]Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in[/FONT]
[FONT="]Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the[/FONT]
[FONT="]temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the[/FONT]
[FONT="]volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls[/FONT]
[FONT="]are added.[/FONT]
[FONT="]This gives two possibilities:[/FONT]
[FONT="]1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate[/FONT]
[FONT="]at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and[/FONT]
[FONT="]pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks[/FONT]
[FONT="]loose.[/FONT]
[FONT="]2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the[/FONT]
[FONT="]increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and[/FONT]
[FONT="]pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.[/FONT]
[FONT="]So which is it?[/FONT]
[FONT="]If we accept the postulate given to me by Carol[/FONT]
[FONT="]during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day[/FONT]
[FONT="]in Hell before I sleep with you, and take into account[/FONT]
[FONT="]the fact that I slept with her last night, then number[/FONT]
[FONT="]two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is[/FONT]
[FONT="]exothermic and has already frozen over.[/FONT]
[FONT="]The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has[/FONT]
[FONT="]frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any[/FONT]
[FONT="]more souls and is therefore, extinct...leaving only[/FONT]
[FONT="]Heaven thereby proving the existence of a divine being[/FONT]
[FONT="]which explains why, last night, Carol kept shouting[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Oh my God."[/FONT]
[FONT="]THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"[/FONT]