So my brother came up today. We bbqed some steaks and corn-on-the-cob. We gathered up some stuff and went fishing about 10 miles down the road near the Sac River. We were there for about four hours tonight. My brother just about finished a 12 pack, i had one. I asked/told him i had to go home and take my meds and go to bed. He got belligerent with me. I told him he had too much to drink and that i should drive home. He took my cell phone and left me there in the dark by side of the river. I walked all the way home. This isn't the only time my family has left me stranded. My father would do it to me in high school. One time i got benched for something and m y dad had me walk home from a different city 35 miles away. My friends at the football game seen me walking on eh side of the road and brought be back to the game. I was told to walk home again. On my high school graduation I was kicked out of my house on my eightieth birthday. Then kicked out of my aunts ranch house and left homeless for about 2 years cause i couldn't make rent into cousin's SC college tuition trust fund. When my grandfather died of Brain cancer, my grandmother blamed me cause i made some pot cookies that the hospice nurse stole and ate and then had a freakout and blamed me, when i told her NOT to eat them . She ended up popping hot for PCP and Coke as well. So there was drug addict taking care of my dining grandfather, but i am the bad guy.
I don't have any childhood friends because when they found out i was homeless, no one returned my calls or had a place to hang out anymore. It took 2 years to get myself in order and save enough with two jobs to move myself to Sac and apply for school. I graduated but was basically told to never come back.
A month or so ago i went to see my other brother and his pregnant Wife in Portland, he and she didn't bother saying anything to me and avoided all eye contact, even staying away from me when we were sitting and waiting for my wife to park, both his wife and him were extremely rude and standoffish so we abruptly left, the drove home. Both of my previous jobs have pretty much done the same thing, after a year they harass me or sabotage my work until i end up in the hospital on Zanex. Then say i "abandoned" my job. overtime i have gone to HR for unsafe work practices or harassment/hazing concerns, they have retaliated against me.
Life is really hard right now, not having any family in my life. . I don't think i am happy in my marriage anymore. For the first 8 years of knowing her she kept leaving and coming back, over and over. We went on a trip to Tahoe for you 5 year anniversary a few weeks ago and it was not good. We returned home a day early.
It seems like everyone is correcting me all the time. I try to get my own words in but, they are disregarded or treated as insignificant. Being told you are wrong your whole life is starting turn my life upside-down. I am questioning my sanity daily.
Please, love you children and your family, love them and hold them as much as you can. Do good for them and mind your thoughts and words about them. Don't let them join the service for an ungrateful nation. They could come back mentally defective, unwanted, and abused, with all meaning and worth for their life lost.
