F%ckers Need To Laugh !!!

Tommy's mom was in the kitchen and was baking a cake when she accidentally hit knocked over a bottle of BB's into the mix. Thinking it would do no harm she just left them in there. Later on Tommy comes running down the stairs yelling.. " Mommy Mommy... I just pissed a BB!"

"Oh don't worry about it Tommy. It shouldn't happen again."

He goes back upstairs and a bit later he comes running down the stairs again and says " Mommy.. Mommy I just pissed BB's again."

The mom once again assured him it would be okay and probably won't happen again.

Next day she is in the kitchen again and Tommy comes running down the stairs yelling " Mommy...Mommy" to where she quickly interrupted and said....

"Let me guess, you just pissed BB's"

He said "No Mommy.. I was masturbating and I shot the dog and I think he is dead."

The parents were going out on a night on the town and left the older brother to take care of his little sister. After the parents left he takes his sister to his room and asks if she would like to see his 'pet mouse.'

Sure she said with a smile..

So he pulls out his penis so just the head is showing and says isn't he cute?

"Yes hes so cute" she replied.

He said if you pet him he will grow..

"Really" she said with a sparkle in her eye.. So she pet him and he grew.

He the said..."He really likes it if you kiss him. He will be your best friend."

So she starts kissing him.

The parents walk in shortly after this and all they hear is the boy yelling upstairs at the top of his lungs, so they run up and asked what is happening.... The little girl said ..

"He was showing me his pet mouse but then he spit on me so I bit his head off."

Okay .. uh, its 5am now and I should sleep. I have more good ones..hehe

Q: How do you hide money from a hippie?
A: Put it under the soap.

Q. What is the difference between politicians and stoners ?
A. Politicians don't inhale...they just suck.

Q. How do you get a one armed hippie out of a tree ?
A. You pass him a joint.




rofl !



Q. What do you call a pot smoker with two spliffs ?
A. Double jointed.



LMFAO

Q. How do fish party ?
A. Seaweed.



thats lame.. ^^ but funny ^^



A: stoner and drunk were walking down a hill. The drunk said, "I think I'm gonna pretend I'm a bottle and just roll down the hill so he did it the stoner thought for a minute then rolled down the hill when he got to the bottom he seen the drunk was in pieces on the ground so he walked over to him the drunk looks up and says how did you make it without getting hurt the stoner said I pretended I was a joint!






sorry if allready posted

Question: What do you called a doped-up Pikachu? Answer: Tokemon!