Skroatz
Well-Known Member
So I'm still young at the age of 20 but recently in the past year I've come down hard to reality. I wish I could go back to when I was 17 running a muck drinking and smoking not thinking about how the world runs and what life really is. At first I looked at religion last year a lot and I just couldn't find anything in them that made me feel secure and go back to normal life. It just got deeper since then, not falling into any religionous beliefs. I'm not sure if it's me when I smoke weed and think too much about life or not, I've stopped smoking weed for a month to see if it made any difference but it did not. I just want to know if I'm normal or if I am actually going insane.
I constantly everyday think, why do I exist? What is life? Does God exist? Are we an experiment of alien beings much more intelligent then us, like we are more intelligent and bigger then rats? Are we not alone? Is something going to happen soon, for example, 2012? I think about these and alot more so much that my own life around me seems to just be a blur. I phase out of conversations a lot. I also get bored of anything REAL quick because I know what I am doing is nothing compared to having those questions answered. I feel like I need a psych to help me because I am feeling anxiety kick in, although I know that won't help because what I know (or want to know) I can't just forget.
I find it hard to make sence of how I am feeling in the last couple months / past year. I hope someone can understand and reply with something positive. Feels like something big is going to happen and ignoring it just makes thoughts worse. Maybe someone here is a psych and help a little.
Also recently smoking weed makes me think about those questions rather then enjoy my stoned time. It makes me depressed sometimes because I can't and know they probably wont be answered. I get paranoid real quick, when I watch the news, I used to watch and think nothing of nuclear weapons and terrorists because my mind was too busy on drinking out etc.. like North Korea got me all worked up thinking WWIII was going to go down, haha. You are free to laugh at a fellow paranoid stoner.
James.
I constantly everyday think, why do I exist? What is life? Does God exist? Are we an experiment of alien beings much more intelligent then us, like we are more intelligent and bigger then rats? Are we not alone? Is something going to happen soon, for example, 2012? I think about these and alot more so much that my own life around me seems to just be a blur. I phase out of conversations a lot. I also get bored of anything REAL quick because I know what I am doing is nothing compared to having those questions answered. I feel like I need a psych to help me because I am feeling anxiety kick in, although I know that won't help because what I know (or want to know) I can't just forget.
I find it hard to make sence of how I am feeling in the last couple months / past year. I hope someone can understand and reply with something positive. Feels like something big is going to happen and ignoring it just makes thoughts worse. Maybe someone here is a psych and help a little.
Also recently smoking weed makes me think about those questions rather then enjoy my stoned time. It makes me depressed sometimes because I can't and know they probably wont be answered. I get paranoid real quick, when I watch the news, I used to watch and think nothing of nuclear weapons and terrorists because my mind was too busy on drinking out etc.. like North Korea got me all worked up thinking WWIII was going to go down, haha. You are free to laugh at a fellow paranoid stoner.
James.