Okay so I used to smoke about 2 grams a day for several years, which may seem like a lot to some, but not much to others. I have smoked for about 8 years. I decided to slow down on it, I used to take 1 hit every now and then. And now I've lost interest in it completely. I absolutely hate the feeling I get from Marijuana. It makes me feel slow, forgetful, dumb, antsy, paranoid, depressed, I feel like everyones judging me. I go from being very social and communicating sober with my close friends to just sitting there looking out of my element like I did some hard drug like a pill or herowin. They also notice the effects it has on me and they have no problem telling me I am not being myself. I have to tell you all that I have never done any other drugs in my life, and I am not depressed, I am not insecure. I am extremely happy sober, but once I smoke the stuff it turns me into a miserable person. I am a happy guy with a great career already developed.
Why did this happen to me? I would way rather live sober than drunk or stoned. Did I grow up, or what. Because in my days of being 18-23 I was all about getting ridiculously stoned and drunk. Now I like being sober. I am honestly looking for opinions on people who have experianced this first hand, and the ones who still smoke, I am not trying to bash anyone, that was not my intent I promise. Sorry for the long post.
Edit: Another thing I forgot to mention, is what usually I think of when I am on it. I began to think of how everything we where taught about history in school is a lie, how corrupt our world leaders are, our corrupt government, nearly every food is horrible for consumption, no god we are a coincidence, how religions used to kill others if they questioned anything, how people are unintelligent and closed minded, how small we are in a crazy universe that none of us truly understand, how humans are the scum of the earth and just consume everything possible and spit out more children, nobody cares about other life forms, humans are the worst bacteria on our planet. If aliens seen our planet and looked at Los Angeles and seen all the pollution they would think our planet has cancer, and humans are the cancer of our planet and 99% do not realize it.
Those are a few things I ponder about when I get stoned. Maybe I just answered my own post. It opens me to the truth. A truth that I have no control over, a truth I have no ability to change on my own. That is why I shut down become quiet and kind of lay there with a blank expression, I have a million insane true facts that I cannot change. It is not as overwhelming when I am sober.
Why did this happen to me? I would way rather live sober than drunk or stoned. Did I grow up, or what. Because in my days of being 18-23 I was all about getting ridiculously stoned and drunk. Now I like being sober. I am honestly looking for opinions on people who have experianced this first hand, and the ones who still smoke, I am not trying to bash anyone, that was not my intent I promise. Sorry for the long post.
Edit: Another thing I forgot to mention, is what usually I think of when I am on it. I began to think of how everything we where taught about history in school is a lie, how corrupt our world leaders are, our corrupt government, nearly every food is horrible for consumption, no god we are a coincidence, how religions used to kill others if they questioned anything, how people are unintelligent and closed minded, how small we are in a crazy universe that none of us truly understand, how humans are the scum of the earth and just consume everything possible and spit out more children, nobody cares about other life forms, humans are the worst bacteria on our planet. If aliens seen our planet and looked at Los Angeles and seen all the pollution they would think our planet has cancer, and humans are the cancer of our planet and 99% do not realize it.
Those are a few things I ponder about when I get stoned. Maybe I just answered my own post. It opens me to the truth. A truth that I have no control over, a truth I have no ability to change on my own. That is why I shut down become quiet and kind of lay there with a blank expression, I have a million insane true facts that I cannot change. It is not as overwhelming when I am sober.
