Living With a Mentally Unstable Person

Padawanbater2

Padawanbater2

Well-Known Member
I really don't know how to handle this situation..

My sister is 25 years old and has to be the craziest person I know, literally unstable. Smokes cigarettes, drinks and smokes weed when she has the money to buy it (asks my dad to 'barrow it' or scrounges for loose change), sleeps all day and stays up all night. The moment she's awake it's Hell, constantly screaming and yelling, constantly bitching about everything, blaming everybody else for her problems. It's made life very difficult for me and the rest of my family to live. I live with my other younger sister and my dad. The place is constantly dirty because nobody can clean because she sleeps all day and bitches about the noise of cleaning.

As I was in the middle of writing this she woke up, couldn't find where she left her last cigarette, started bitching and throwing everything around, I said "dude, just relax, it's just a cigarette.." wondering in my mind how the fuck someone could get that upset about it... she flew off the handle, started disrespecting me and calling me every name in the book, even threatened to have her friends beat my ass if I touched her. She hit me in the face and spit on my face. Talk about BATSHIT FUCKING INSANE, am I right? I've called the cops on her one time before and she spent 5 days in jail because of it, also for assaulting me.

What the fuck do I do about this situation? What the fuck CAN I do? I've tried ignoring her, I've tried catering to her every goddamn need to quell the bitching, NOTHING works!

She just lost her iPhone4 last month at a party she got too drunk at (also the 3rd or 4th time she's lost or misplaced a really expensive phone she didn't pay for) so she was constantly nagging my dad to use his, every moment he's home and awake. He'd tell me how all this combined behavior bothers him. So instead of telling her she needs to get a job and be patient and save some money to get her own phone, the three of us, him, me and my little sister get her a new iPhone4, JUST SO SHE WILL STOP BITCHING! Arrives yesterday and this shit happens today..
 
CR500ROOST

CR500ROOST

Well-Known Member
Wow and I thought I was the only one.Glad to kinda here I'm not the only one with family like that.
 
bud nugbong

bud nugbong

Well-Known Member
yea people like that suck to be around..especially if it stresses you out in any way. i agree w 420 and get your own pad and hope she doesnt follow you. or get your pops to throw her ass out. It doesnt sound like shes doing him any favors.

and if anyone ever spit on me i would whoop some ass female or not. thats an uppercut to the jaw at least.
 
B

brimck325

Well-Known Member
move out bro....its your pops place, so his rule....i would throw her out on her ass if was my kid.....peace
 
Metasynth

Metasynth

Well-Known Member
Show her the pimp hand and put her out on the corner to make your money...

But seriously, move out, that bitch sounds crazy!
 
Total Head

Total Head

Well-Known Member
without knowing the whole situation i can't offer a tailored suggestion, but i'm somewhat familiar with dealing with unstable relatives.

in my experience, if they won't voluntarily get help, the only solution is to continually have them arrested to where they become a known nuisance, and the courts eventually get harsh enough to where they finally get the help or are forced to by law. you should be aware that this option tears families apart before it repairs them, but if it's getting that bad it might be the only option.

i agree that moving out will fix the problem for the op, but if i were in his shoes i wouldn't feel comfortable ditching my parents to just deal with that, especially if they are getting on in age (my mother is almost 70). that's a family problem and just leaving his parents alone with a loony toon won't help anyone but himself. i'm all for looking out for number one but i consider family to be under the umbrella of "number one".
 
Padawanbater2

Padawanbater2

Well-Known Member
You're all right, moving out is the solution.

What about the income void my dad would most likely face if I were to move out, I pitch in with rent/groceries pretty often, often enough to where it might become a problem.

I'm the only one that does any cleaning or cooking or anything like that, it bothers me to think there wouldn't be anyone to cook dinner. That seems like some shit I'll just have to get over..

I moved out for 5-6 months in 2007-2008, moved half way across the country. Relationships were good.
 
Padawanbater2

Padawanbater2

Well-Known Member
Total Head said:
i agree that moving out will fix the problem for the op, but if i were in his shoes i wouldn't feel comfortable ditching my parents to just deal with that, especially if they are getting on in age (my mother is almost 70). that's a family problem and just leaving his parents alone with a loony toon won't help anyone but himself. i'm all for looking out for number one but i consider family to be under the umbrella of "number one".
Click to expand...
This.......
 
cannabineer

cannabineer

Ursus marijanus
Total Head said:
without knowing the whole situation i can't offer a tailored suggestion, but i'm somewhat familiar with dealing with unstable relatives.

in my experience, if they won't voluntarily get help, the only solution is to continually have them arrested to where they become a known nuisance, and the courts eventually get harsh enough to where they finally get the help or are forced to by law. you should be aware that this option tears families apart before it repairs them, but if it's getting that bad it might be the only option.

i agree that moving out will fix the problem for the op, but if i were in his shoes i wouldn't feel comfortable ditching my parents to just deal with that, especially if they are getting on in age (my mother is almost 70). that's a family problem and just leaving his parents alone with a loony toon won't help anyone but himself. i'm all for looking out for number one but i consider family to be under the umbrella of "number one".
Click to expand...
Imo it depends on how the family behaves. Since the parents obviously put up with this woman's flatly unacceptable behavior, they're signing off on being OK with it. I would leave at once so as not to feed the enablement spiral. The duty to family should never be construed to be unconditional. Jmo. cn
 
sunni

sunni

Administrator
Staff member
why do you have to suffer? why do you and your family have to deal with her shit? kick her the fuck out of the house.
 
Padawanbater2

Padawanbater2

Well-Known Member
My dad would never do that, her short of actually really physically harming me or my little sister. In size, it wouldn't ever come to that, she's 5'6, probably 110lbs, I'm 6'2 at around 175lbs. And in a sense I agree with him. You don't do that to family, no matter how crazy they get. In life all you have is family.

So my mom just came over, on her break from her job and we talked about what happened, then she went and spoke to my sister about it. I could hear her describing everything to her, she was talking about how I don't have anything, money, a girlfriend, a car, etc. materialistic things, bullshit things I couldn't care less about (which is probably why I don't have them), and that was really it... meanwhile I'm thinking 'why does what I have or don't have matter at all, why of all the things you could've, at least attempted to use, as justification for striking me and spitting on my face would you have chosen that?' to me, it's like there isn't any real tangible reason to act like this.

...5 minutes pass and she walks out and says "I'm sorry for spitting on you..." I said "That doesn't mean anything to me", then she walked away with tears in her eyes "..well I am, I know you don't accept it but I am..".

Then my mom came out and asked "why is your sister crying?".

This is the same shit that's happened over and over and over before. When she got out of jail she apologized for everything too, and I believed her. She told my dad all the substances I've experimented with when he and I were confronting her about her behavior once just to put the spotlight on me and we got drunk one night and talked about it and I forgave her for even that! I can't forgive a person for this kind of shit. This constant supply of emotional damage with no honest remorse. I feel like if she's sorry, she'll show me she's sorry by changing the way she acts, by changing the way she is.

Saying sorry doesn't mean shit to me anymore... https://www.rollitup.org/spirituality-sexuality-philosophy/489426-whats-apology-worth.html
 
dirtsurfr

dirtsurfr

Well-Known Member
Well you don't want to call the cops, you don't want her to suffer, you don't want to move out, no matter what or were you turn theres a
dead end.
Until you get fed up and beat the holly shit out of her you won't see any change, you'll be in jail safe from her being a child and when
you get out you won't be able to be around her..
Or you could have her commited for her own safty..
 
2fast92

2fast92

Well-Known Member
Damn bro. That sucks, the safest option is too move out but I wouldn't want ot abandon my family either. I would call the cops the next time she hits you or your dad, even if you don't want to. It's necessary, it might even be good for her. I don't know what else to tell you.
 
......

......

Well-Known Member
Sounds like she might need a reality check.Maybe throw her out?Not for good but just to show how shit can go if she dont change.
 
Orithil

Orithil

Well-Known Member
It only takes signatures from 3 family members to have someone declared incompetent and committed against their will in most states.
 
medicalmaryjane

medicalmaryjane

Well-Known Member
lol, i agree with dots

i do feel bad fo rher because she is 25 and nothings going on in her life. i don't kno whow old youa re but at 25, if nothings going on, you feel like nothing will ever go on and it probably won't sadly. she should probably seek professional counseling & you should be easy on her because she's crakcing. have a heart to heart with her and tell her why you think she's being nuts and ask her to have some respect.

i do think a reality check would get her in order. appreciate parents who allow you to live in their house for free. especially when you're 25.e
 
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