I was standing in the Gameworks videogame arcade in the Arizona Mills mall next to the Jurassic Park Dino Hunting adventure when the acid really took hold for the first time. I had been on the come up for about 15 minutes 1 hour after placing two blotters of "timothy leary" paper acid under my tongue. My friends were "seasoned trippers" but I was an acid virgin. By the time we were heading into the jeep style, enclosed hunting adventure video game, I was losing control. My body wasn't quite responding the way I felt it should. I was having alot of trouble negotiating my way out of my jacket, and when the person tending the game asked for my card to swipe the credit for the game, I couldn't understand a single word coming out of his mouth and just slapped him five instead. More games were played, but it passes out of memory
---- at some point we left the Gameworks and went over to the Imax to watch Fantasia 2000 ----
Fantasia was incredible. I remember thinking that everyone in the theatre was tripping. I thought "I can't believe that this movie was made for people who are tripping on acid, and then cleverly marketed to children and conservative parents by the Disney corporation." it seemed to me that clearly it was created to only be comprehended by those in a heightened state of conciousness.
After the show there were several hours of tripping exploration. Smoking joints, and hash. I remember realizing the psychadelic nature of Alice in wonderland. I remember saying to my friends, "this is amazing" over and over "why don't we do this everyday?" Long moments of pure bliss.
It was later that evening that a key piece of information that I have yet to mention clicked into place; My friends, the "seasoned trippers" had dropped about 3-4 hours before me. So at about 2am they had come down. I was still tripping balls, just barely past the peak. Probably 4 to 6 hours into it. Since they were done, and I was a noob who didn't speak up, things had the opportunity to change. The music stopped. The lights turned out. I was alone. Before long I was introduced to the darkness. The fear was like nothing I had ever felt. It was the black suffocating fear of my most vivid night terror compounded exponentially. I was dying. My ego was dying. I was so small. Too small to escape out from under this crushing mass of darkness. I was going mad. I was driven past death into madness. My belief was that I was stuck there now, and that I'd never return to myself. This fear held me prisoner. Unable to speak or move for the next 4-5 hours.
By the time I started to get control of my mind again the sun had started to come up. I decided that sleep was going to remain elusive so I abandoned that venture, got up, put on my shoes, and headed out. Since it was only about 3/4 of a mile to my house I decided to walk home. There seemed to be a special hush about me as I began my walk. As if the world knew the nature of the ordeal I had been through, and was seeking to comfort me. The birds sang softly, the sun peeking over the horizon set a happy gleam to me and my surroundings. It was at that point that I realized some thing that has never left me throughout my life since. I was different now. Upon "waking up" from this experience I noticed that there was something different about me. Something different in my very core. A fundamental change had been wrought upon me and the way I looked at life, and love, and people. I remember noticing the change, and feeling that it was truly good. I don't remember how I thought or interacted with the world before this change. I just remember noticing that the change had happend. And as a result of the difference in the way I felt, I made the proclomation that everyone should have at least one strong acid trip in their lives. Whatever the difference was, I felt everyone needed it.
It took me almost 2 years to build up the courage to try it again. The next couple dozen acid adventures went off without any serious stress....