Dark Energy: think of it like your brain on drugs.
The White Matter is the 'smart' part, the Grey Matter is the 'dumb' part.
It's takes a lot of dumb parts to support the smart parts.
It's also really, really, important that there is room in between the smart parts for the quarks and neutrinos.
A neutrino here, a neutrino there, and pretty soon you're all fucked up man.
I mean nothing can travel faster than light. Right?
And nothing can be in two places at the same time? Right?
Fucking neutrinos can be both at the same time!