Money Laundering

with diamonds well i would say this is the best commodity because roughtly a 1 carat diamond is worth £1500 to £2500 and that takes up less than 125mm cubed so going on that idea you dont even need a storage unit but i would recomed it as you then know exactly where it is. in a small match box of 5cm by 1cm by 2.5cm which has a volume of 12,500mm cubed could hold £200,000

stack it take it to a casino (vegas, atlantic city) get you some chips trade um back in all new cash... on to the stash spot alot of work but well worth it to clean 50 grand real quick all for the cost of a cheap vacation...done it a few time for a lot less then 50...works for me...as far as banks go i dont use them put a lil change in them to keep open but i deal with cash...a lot smaller trail to follow if someone(irs,feds) tried...

Could hide diamonds in any of the following places.
in the leg of a coffe table
in a matchbox on a shelf
in a wall
in a small bag
in a car door bocket
car glove compartment
little trphy like something the size of the ashes

PS red diamond £2,000,000 per carat

Become a spiritual advisor, they can charge what ever they want and you can keep a clean set of books...Paranormal is also another way to hide behind a business that doesn't actually have to produce anything... Love Guru, Ghost hunter, bounty hunter, exterminator, at home resume writer, contortionist, stripper.lol...Male prostitute is also a good one, but you will have to pay tax with these things... These are just good fronts for a small business idea... Remember you don't have to declare all of the cash, but some of it, to keep it legit...

Stashing cash is the best way to keep ALL of your money, but it will NEVER be clean that way....

laceygirl said:

Become a spiritual advisor, they can charge what ever they want and you can keep a clean set of books...Paranormal is also another way to hide behind a business that doesn't actually have to produce anything... Love Guru, Ghost hunter, bounty hunter, exterminator, at home resume writer, contortionist, stripper.lol...Male prostitute is also a good one, but you will have to pay tax with these things... These are just good fronts for a small business idea... Remember you don't have to declare all of the cash, but some of it, to keep it legit...

Stashing cash is the best way to keep ALL of your money, but it will NEVER be clean that way....

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snap! a spiritual/love advisor with an office located in LA 90210 area would be huge $$$

ok a small buisness front by why not become an international trader no tax on that
and your money can appear from anywhere

become a real rock n roller and play all the businesses

Wow I wouldnt do any of that except for the metals investing.
A) Its illegal to have a living space in a storage unit in the US, its called squatting
B) 2,000,000 carat red diamond, do you know what laundering is? At least thats inconspicious........
C) What happens when your door gets kicked down and all your stacked diamonds are found
D) Male prostitue, are you serious? This is about keeping your op up and making money legal
E) ^The last one, what good is it to move from your OP to start a faux company when your no longer going to have money that needs "laundering"

This isnt about the most extravigant fraud you can get away with, its about making money clean.

igrowbigg said:

yes but i want to use all my money to buy a house n cars n shit n i cant really put a few hundred grand down in cash (example).

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dont buy big shit that you can't otherwise afford.

Dude open a flower shop so youll have an idea of how to
grow shit

Wow, reallly?!?!?! Really?!?! NO ONE has thought of this.....are you serious? The BEST FRONT EVER!!! ANYONE can become an ordained minister online for FREE. Do that and start a "CHURCH". OMG HUGE Tax shelter and "donations" right and left! Put everything you can in the church's name to keep it as tax-free as possible. Pay yourself a hefty salary. Hire an excellent accountant you TRUST. Don't be stupid. And ALWAYS be first in line to PAY YOUR TAXES!!! You can't launder any real cash completely for free, but this is probably as close as you're going to get. All those other small business ideas are great, however they require actual "work" and overhead etc etc - fuck a bunch of that. Clean, low-taxed cash really isn't that hard to come by. Just look around at who pays the least amount of taxes and work your own loopholes. Use the system against the system. That is all.

Im gonna assume your not gonna have any actual church right no members no building no sunday school, youth group, none of that shit right? But your gonna have a Bank account and an accountant with a churches name on it and large cash deposits?.....you ever think that a church gets like 100 differnt checks from individuals every sunday.... or twenty based on your money and we are talking about deposits of 10k or more right... what you gonna do when the auditor comes. dont think this one will work

buy land on owner contract, at least u would have a place to go if it gets hot

There are methods to wash your money through casino's.

Really though, I would just start a small business and show almost no profit. Like a mobile carwash biz. Start up costs can be high.

The easiest route is a plain old safe deposit box.

lol this is very interesting

Yeah.....you've never seen a new church coming together, have you? This usually meets in someone's living room.....You're taking all this way too far - no need for any real brick and mortar buildings etc etc..... K.I.S.S. That is all.

Being a sex worker is legal in my country...

laceygirl said:

Being a sex worker is legal in my country...

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i wanna go

FWIW you cannot wash the drug smell off Money so that drug sniffing dogs cannot find it. A Dog's smell is so great that it can detect 1 ounce of MJ in the middle of 50,000 gallons of diesel fuel. You cannot cover up a smell with something else, the dog will just smell both. The only thing you can do is confuse the handler by having something else with you that the dog wants, burgers in a bag, a cat in the vehicle etc etc.

RedHairs said:

WHAT!! WHAT!!! WHAT!!!!

Customs has dogs trained to smell money?! I never knew that! I mean, it makes sense... but I didn't think they'd spend the time training dogs to do that. Damn. Learn something every day.

Wait, wait, wait... I was just about to + rep you for that; not saying that I don't believe you, but I don't believe you. Please, show me another source with this same information so I know it's true and not just hearsay from another paranoid fellow pot-head.

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In regards to the dogs being trained to sniff out money/weapons/explosives/drugs that has been standard practice here in the UK for over 20 years now and my grandad (Royal air force militiary police dog handler) was doing it in the 60`s even, also bear in mind that 93% of all bank notes worldwide test positive for traces of cocaine when randomly sampled so they havent got to even sniff out the notes/bills just the cocaine on them. All this aside tho anyone with any experience of proffessional working dogs (police/DEA?customs etc) will know that on average over £250k is spent on continous training throughout the dogs working life and dogs sense of smell is between 250-3000 (dependant on breed of dog) times more powerful than a humans.

at the end of the day you wouldnt try running from a Police dog so dont try and outsmart a drugs dog lol