CanadianCoyote
Well-Known Member
Alright, just got off the phone with one of my best friends in the whole wide world... and he had an interesting story to tell me. I figured I'd share it, because I'm still crying from laughing.
First off, a disclaimer. My buddy is one of the best people I've ever met on this planet... a big heart, a good sense of humor, hard working... all of those good things. But... bless him... he's not that bright. He smokes a ton of weed, but even if he didn't smoke he'd still be ... well, not that bright. XD
He has a terrible time with girls, see, and he's never managed to get one to go to bed with him. He's tried, OH has he tried, but it never works out... because he's just so damn awkward. Anyway, he had a date last night with a friend of someone he works with.
The date went pretty well by all accounts, they got along okay, but then the girl started telling him about how she was a lesbian and curious about what it was like to be with a dude, because she'd never been with one before. He was incredulous... he said to me, "How do you know if you don't like dick if you've never tried one before?"... and my scathing reply was simply "...I could ask you the same question." (Oddly enough he's asked me the same question before and my answer has always been similar. Now, I have "tried" dick.. I just didn't feel like sharing that information with him, because he'd latch onto it and never let it go....)
Anyway... it gets better.
She told him that what she really wanted was to have a baby, and that she wanted him to get her pregnant. "You wouldn't have to take care of it or nothin'! I just want your sperm...."
And my reply was "IT'S A TRAP!!!!! Don't do eet mang!!!"
He didn't quite get what I was saying... so I told him that if he were to act as her sperm donor, then he needed to go to lawyer and get that shit in writing. Get a legal document that says he bears no responsibility for the kid... and then go at it.
There was a pause.
"How long would that take? How much would that cost?"
...Which says to me that he's considering it, because he has a girl that's more than willing to fuck him and he doesn't think he has any better options. It's kinda pathetic, but... yeah.
He had to hang up on me because she was calling him back... they're gonna try and set something up for the weekend. I did my best to warn him, to educate him... but I wonder if the pull of pussy is gonna win out over logic.
Probably.
Commence giggling.
First off, a disclaimer. My buddy is one of the best people I've ever met on this planet... a big heart, a good sense of humor, hard working... all of those good things. But... bless him... he's not that bright. He smokes a ton of weed, but even if he didn't smoke he'd still be ... well, not that bright. XD
He has a terrible time with girls, see, and he's never managed to get one to go to bed with him. He's tried, OH has he tried, but it never works out... because he's just so damn awkward. Anyway, he had a date last night with a friend of someone he works with.
The date went pretty well by all accounts, they got along okay, but then the girl started telling him about how she was a lesbian and curious about what it was like to be with a dude, because she'd never been with one before. He was incredulous... he said to me, "How do you know if you don't like dick if you've never tried one before?"... and my scathing reply was simply "...I could ask you the same question." (Oddly enough he's asked me the same question before and my answer has always been similar. Now, I have "tried" dick.. I just didn't feel like sharing that information with him, because he'd latch onto it and never let it go....)
Anyway... it gets better.
She told him that what she really wanted was to have a baby, and that she wanted him to get her pregnant. "You wouldn't have to take care of it or nothin'! I just want your sperm...."
And my reply was "IT'S A TRAP!!!!! Don't do eet mang!!!"
He didn't quite get what I was saying... so I told him that if he were to act as her sperm donor, then he needed to go to lawyer and get that shit in writing. Get a legal document that says he bears no responsibility for the kid... and then go at it.
There was a pause.
"How long would that take? How much would that cost?"
...Which says to me that he's considering it, because he has a girl that's more than willing to fuck him and he doesn't think he has any better options. It's kinda pathetic, but... yeah.
He had to hang up on me because she was calling him back... they're gonna try and set something up for the weekend. I did my best to warn him, to educate him... but I wonder if the pull of pussy is gonna win out over logic.
Probably.
Commence giggling.
