Please Do Not Do Fentanyl!!!!!!

CaNNaBiZ CaNucK

Well-Known Member
My condolences, Brother.
Honour her by staying strong and living your life to the fullest. That's what she wants for you. As tough as it is, use your love for her and her love for you as motivation to carry on. She'll be right there with you.
 

hillbilly345

Active Member
This hole thing just sucks. I just want people to know how bad this effects your loved ones. Im triing to accept the fact of "LONENESS!" It hurts so much. I did everything I could for her. I decked out her condo for her when we where living together. It was hard to live in the city. We where homebodies we didnt socialize to much. She worked nights and I worked days. Her condo had 11' ceilings with8" walls it was hard to live there when the other was sleeping you could hear everything. I wanted to finish the wallls to the ceiling but she didnt want that. We needed a house and with the market droppng i found a foreclosure/ rehab for us , i was triing to fix it up as much as I could so she would rent out her condo and move in with me. she worked 3 days alternating so we would only see each other every couple of days. I wanted to be with her . Right now work is slow so I would be spending all my time down there with her , decorating for the holidays. But now I cant. I dont want to bring any one down but I feel you guys understand better than some. Ive gotten mre support here than any other online community. Thanks again guys. When we where together I would sometimes go onhere and read some of the posts , and we would laugh about them.
 

hillbilly345

Active Member
She was a professional, and was also triing to open a Medical tourism business , I couldnt even fathom what that entailed but I still supported her. She was so witty and motivated , I could never think of something like this happening. She was always so organized and detailed. She had OCD nothing could be out of place. Im just in shock this has happened. Im triing to be strong , but I need to grieve also, I cant hold this in I have to just let it flow. Its not really easy talking about this but it is making me feel better. I know she wouldnt want me like this , but its hard to think that way ,when it was her action that put me in this predicament in the first place. Dont be shy and just read, I appreciate any support I can get. Thanks.
 

high|hgih

Well-Known Member
I really hope you do alright! I had a few friends throught who have died of overdoses, and I still tear up thinking about them sometimes! Its a terrible thing to go through just because of how pointless an OD is.. The thing that I always think about when I get into it is how 'I' would overdose.. I KNOW for a fact it wouldn't be on purpose, but its always the fact that when I mix or take more of something than I normally do, what always goes through my head is, I feel fine lets just do a bigass line and end the night.. I have never even heard of that drug before, and I am super sorry for your loss, but you just need to know that your gonna be okay. That kind of shit happens every day and tears apart relationships all the time.. I can tell you that there is more fish in the sea, and there really is, you just found one of the few giant ones, there IS bigger ones, but that fish gave you a great taste that you will never forget.
 

hillbilly345

Active Member
I will always remember her and all the good times we had together. We traveled alot, I was a stargazer , a day dreamer, I always loved nature and the outdoors, she was a bookworm who I thought at times took life and nature for granted. She did dream big though, so big that sometimes I couldnt even imagine the scope of her dreams . We would always travel to Colorado to visit my brother and we would travel all over through the mountains staying in nice places, enjoying all the hot springs we could, we loved that , we had always had alot of romance. Im glad I have all those pictures of her smiling faces in all those beautiful places we would go. She was my inspiration, and she will continue to be. Please everyone, you dont need any other drugs out there except the one this site is about. I never heard of anyone dying from smoking weed. I know Ive smoked so much that if it didnt kill me It wont kill anyone else. Please leave all those other drugs alone. You dont need Coke, Meth, Oxy or any of that other shit. At some point it will kill you or just waist your life. Thanks. In memory of D.E.K. , may the Lord Hold You In Your Arms . Rest In Peace My Love..................
 
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