I'd never expect a blowjob on a first date, I was referring to an exgirlfriend.
I'm no Carne, but if I were a chick, I would love to give head. That is what makes it a good blowjob, enthusiasm. You can be the worst cocksucker on the planet, but if you like what you're doing and are willing to learn, you'll soon enough be the best, or much better than you were before. My gripe is with chicks who expect it to be a luxury, something only given on birthdays or holidays, once or twice a year. I love going down on a girl, I get no physical pleasure out of it whatsoever, the pleasure I get comes from giving pleasure, knowing she loves it. Using that line of reasoning, when no blowjobs are had for 6.. 8 months, one reasonably starts to think "why doesn't she like giving me pleasure...?", especially when there's nothing in it for her physically. It's somewhat selfish imo. She's only in it for hers, fuck mine. That's what's the deal breaker. There's a lot more to it than "suck my cock!".
With all due respect, it sounds like you have a somewhat immature attitude towards a penis, sure we pee out of it, but it's also the instrument that creates life. I personally keep my entire area clean and shaven, especially if I suspect action that evening. I'd never attempt to stick a smelly cock down someones throat, ever.
The problem I find most often in my experiences with horrible blowjobs are, as mentioned before, no enthusiasm, too much hand (it's a blowjob, jot a handjob..), and awful technique, which leads me to my next point... watch a fuckin' porno! How do you think I became so good at munching box? I watched tons and tons of porn. I know exactly what the fuck I'm doing. This, again, tells me a lot. In most cases, I've found a person who doesn't watch porn, if for nothing more than to learn, isn't sexually mature enough to engage in sexual activity, or, they're not comfortable with themselves in a sexual kind of way to enjoy what they're doing. They think "tongue on the cock should make him bust in 5 minutes" and are dumbfounded when he doesn't.
I don't think I'm asking too much, the longest I'd have a chick go down on me is probably 15 minutes, if it doesn't happen by then, it probably wont. I've had friends tell me tales of their girlfriend spending 45-1 hour going down on them and me being completely stunned! 15 minutes is too much to ask?
Another thing, most women don't realize how painful eating box actually is the next day. The underside of the tongue is completely raw from moving it around so much, so it's not as if the jaw thing isn't bad, it is, I'm sure, but no pain no gain, and I do it for you, not for me, so why isn't the favor returned?
You don't even have to do any work, just sit there with your mouth open and I'll do the work, but then you're labeled a whole host of sexist things.. it's a no win scenario..