You Know You're Paranoid When . . .

We all have stories of goofy paranoia, most of which end in laughs as we sober up.

My story is that I was at a party and we had just started feeling the effects of a "Philosophy Blunt," when the cops surrounded the house. They immediately rounded up everyone outside and took their information, and two cops went inside the house to check for alcohol. In a fit of paranoia and fear, I dove into some bushes in the backyard of the house, and hid there for 15 minutes.

As I crouched behind the bush, basking in the mental mind-fuck of the blunt, I began to think that it was possible for me to fight a cop. By the time I made the choice to leave my hiding spot, I was fully convinced that, if push came to shove, I could take down an officer of the law.

When I poked my head from the branches of the bush, I moved one foot forward. As my foot hid the ground, it crushed a large stick. The stick snapped, scaring me so much that I whipped around and saw my shadow on the fence behind me. Immediately thinking it was a cop, I pushed my own shadow, smashing my knuckles into the fence.

I ended up running home at a full sprint, gripping my throbbing hand. When I got home I wrapped it in a tube sock as I burned out on my bed.

Any good stories from you guys?
 

cph

Well-Known Member
We all have stories of goofy paranoia, most of which end in laughs as we sober up.

My story is that I was at a party and we had just started feeling the effects of a "Philosophy Blunt," when the cops surrounded the house. They immediately rounded up everyone outside and took their information, and two cops went inside the house to check for alcohol. In a fit of paranoia and fear, I dove into some bushes in the backyard of the house, and hid there for 15 minutes.

As I crouched behind the bush, basking in the mental mind-fuck of the blunt, I began to think that it was possible for me to fight a cop. By the time I made the choice to leave my hiding spot, I was fully convinced that, if push came to shove, I could take down an officer of the law.

When I poked my head from the branches of the bush, I moved one foot forward. As my foot hid the ground, it crushed a large stick. The stick snapped, scaring me so much that I whipped around and saw my shadow on the fence behind me. Immediately thinking it was a cop, I pushed my own shadow, smashing my knuckles into the fence.

I ended up running home at a full sprint, gripping my throbbing hand. When I got home I wrapped it in a tube sock as I burned out on my bed.

Any good stories from you guys?

hahahhahahahha thats funny shit!!

I'm not a paranoid person, but 1 of my friends is and when we go over there to smoke out. He sprays a hole fucking can of those glade air fresheners. It trips his dog out real bad, he starts rolling around and flipping out. So since the dogs acting crazy so does he and is in every window and won't sit down. Drives me crazy!!:peace:
 
Last night there was a queen ant thing in my room (basically a wasp but not very big). I was pretty high and it was buzzing around my desk and computer monitor. I tried to ignore it until I came to the horrifying conclusion that wasps have an active, awake part of their day and this was it for this bug. Just watching it was terrifying and I had to kill it :P
 

indy kuh

Active Member
omfg i get paranoid........

I was sittn in my backyard smoking at like 4:20 a.m...... well anyways i was almost done and i look up and about 100 feet away i see a fucking 20 ft giant deer standing inbetween a light post.....i got so scared, my heart started racing and then i was like wtf....deer arent 20ft so i lookd closer and it was just a big rock....i was like dude....cmon im retarded....
 
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