I think I would be a good Messiah

C

CC Dobbs

Well-Known Member
I have always wanted to be a Messiah. I don't want to be connected to any of the dumb established religions you see on TV. I want to rule all, benevolently and with less dogma.

I was going to post about how I would be a good moderator but the conditions for moderator-ship are more stringent and constraining than a job in the Messianic trades. Also Handel did that really cool piece named after me.

It seems that maybe there are some close similarities between mods and saviors, I dunno maybe I'm just imagining it but anyway do allow me to present my qualifications for this esteemed position(s?).


Judgement: I am very judgmental and I can make a decision without knowing all of the facts. I am a decider.

Posture: I standup very straight and this is important when your subjects are watching you.

Spelling: My spelling is usually pretty good.

Influence: I have a slightly stronger gravitational pull on other things than objects of my size are supposed to have. This ability to attract means I can exert more influence on similar sized humans than they are prepared for.

Dogs: Dogs love me.

Weight: About average for my height but with slightly more mass than expected. See above.

Height: 177cm

Favorite Movie: There are so many.

Patience: I have a great deal of patience with the exception of around diner time if I'm hungry and don't feel like cooking. I can be a little cranky then but usually I'm fairly even-keeled.

Family: I murdered my family several years ago in preparation for my arising. I do have some regrets but over all it was a good career move. So I'm free to relocate.

Past Experience: Nothing that really says 'Messiah' so I'll leave this part out.

Future Plans: Nothing set in stone, I'm just going with what feels good.


I hope that this info helps you to see that I'd make a helluva Messiah, I'd be cool as a Messiah. If you get the chance vote for me....Peace out.
 
Singlemalt

Singlemalt

Well-Known Member
You didn't mention patience, a Messiah needs patience. Especially since its such a rare position and we have little experience; thus its gonna take a bit of time to decide on the pre-requisites (job experience, college degrees, outside activities, etc) and the duties; oh yeah and salary. Myself, I think you're a front runner, but we have to decide on the above so we'll keep your resume on file and get back to you
 
C

CC Dobbs

Well-Known Member
I appreciate the kind words. As the Messiah I am not at all afraid to hand out favors to those who support me in the beginning or those who can wield immense power over mine enemies

I haven't got my whole agenda thought through but I kinda want to go with a tropical motif in my main digs with a more modest set-up at the public receiving place.
 
C

CC Dobbs

Well-Known Member
Singlemalt said:
You didn't mention patience, a Messiah needs patience. Especially since its such a rare position and we have little experience; thus its gonna take a bit of time to decide on the pre-requisites (job experience, college degrees, outside activities, etc) and the duties; oh yeah and salary. Myself, I think you're a front runner, but we have to decide on the above so we'll keep your resume on file and get back to you
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Dear Kind Citizen Singlemalt,

In response to your kind response I will reply that I believe I did ( and after going back and looking at the posting a second time can with absolute surety say I did) say a little bit about patience.

Soon to be your Savior.
 
C

CaretakerDad

Well-Known Member
CC Dobbs said:
I have always wanted to be a Messiah. I don't want to be connected to any of the dumb established religions you see on TV. I want to rule all, benevolently and with less dogma.

I was going to post about how I would be a good moderator but the conditions for moderator-ship are more stringent and constraining than a job in the Messianic trades. Also Handel did that really cool piece named after me.

It seems that maybe there are some close similarities between mods and saviors, I dunno maybe I'm just imagining it but anyway do allow me to present my qualifications for this esteemed position(s?).


Judgement: I am very judgmental and I can make a decision without knowing all of the facts. I am a decider.

Posture: I standup very straight and this is important when your subjects are watching you.

Spelling: My spelling is usually pretty good.

Influence: I have a slightly stronger gravitational pull on other things than objects of my size are supposed to have. This ability to attract means I can exert more influence on similar sized humans than they are prepared for.

Dogs: Dogs love me.

Weight: About average for my height but with slightly more mass than expected. See above.

Height: 177cm

Favorite Movie: There are so many.

Patience: I have a great deal of patience with the exception of around diner time if I'm hungry and don't feel like cooking. I can be a little cranky then but usually I'm fairly even-keeled.

Family: I murdered my family several years ago in preparation for my arising. I do have some regrets but over all it was a good career move. So I'm free to relocate.

Past Experience: Nothing that really says 'Messiah' so I'll leave this part out.

Future Plans: Nothing set in stone, I'm just going with what feels good.


I hope that this info helps you to see that I'd make a helluva Messiah, I'd be cool as a Messiah. If you get the chance vote for me....Peace out.
Click to expand...

I will gladly join your cult and neuter myself if you can stop the other Messiah (AKA GhostDriver) from ever posting again. No healing, walking on water, or raising yourself or anyone else from the dead bullshit. Just shut the nutbag up.
 
dannyboy602

dannyboy602

Well-Known Member
CC Dobbs said:
Dear Kind Citizen Singlemalt,

In response to your kind response I will reply that I believe I did ( and after going back and looking at the posting a second time can with absolute surety say I did) say a little bit about patience.

Soon to be your Savior.
Click to expand...
I think we need to do a background check.
 
MightyMike530

MightyMike530

Well-Known Member
CC Dobbs said:
I have always wanted to be a Messiah. I don't want to be connected to any of the dumb established religions you see on TV. I want to rule all, benevolently and with less dogma.

I was going to post about how I would be a good moderator but the conditions for moderator-ship are more stringent and constraining than a job in the Messianic trades. Also Handel did that really cool piece named after me.

It seems that maybe there are some close similarities between mods and saviors, I dunno maybe I'm just imagining it but anyway do allow me to present my qualifications for this esteemed position(s?).


Judgement: I am very judgmental and I can make a decision without knowing all of the facts. I am a decider.

Posture: I standup very straight and this is important when your subjects are watching you.

Spelling: My spelling is usually pretty good.

Influence: I have a slightly stronger gravitational pull on other things than objects of my size are supposed to have. This ability to attract means I can exert more influence on similar sized humans than they are prepared for.

Dogs: Dogs love me.

Weight: About average for my height but with slightly more mass than expected. See above.

Height: 177cm

Favorite Movie: There are so many.

Patience: I have a great deal of patience with the exception of around diner time if I'm hungry and don't feel like cooking. I can be a little cranky then but usually I'm fairly even-keeled.

Family: I murdered my family several years ago in preparation for my arising. I do have some regrets but over all it was a good career move. So I'm free to relocate.

Past Experience: Nothing that really says 'Messiah' so I'll leave this part out.

Future Plans: Nothing set in stone, I'm just going with what feels good.


I hope that this info helps you to see that I'd make a helluva Messiah, I'd be cool as a Messiah. If you get the chance vote for me....Peace out.
Click to expand...
CC Dobbs,

In your application it has been noted that you failed to mention any specifics regarding the feelings of felines towards your person. Cats have been scientifically proven to be the heralds of messiahs, therefore, could you please explain in detail how felines of all forms relate to your person. Thanks.

MM530
Messiah Management Consultants, LLC
 
C

CC Dobbs

Well-Known Member
MightyMike530 said:
CC Dobbs,

In your application it has been noted that you failed to mention any specifics regarding the feelings of felines towards your person. Cats have been scientifically proven to be the heralds of messiahs, therefore, could you please explain in detail how felines of all forms relate to your person. Thanks.

MM530
Messiah Management Consultants, LLC
Click to expand...
Mr 530,

Sir I would like to state for the record that I like cats. I have found cats to seem indifferent sometimes to my feelings though I cannot be absolutely sure of this.

I do on occasion find myself at the center of what can only be called a cat dominated procession. I will be walking down a street somewhere and all of the sudden a cat will show up walking by my side. Soon another joins in until a whole crew of variously colored cats are surrounding me. I've had as many as 50 of those things strolling along with me. This can create quite a traffic hazard. I don't know what is going on but it creeps me out.

I have been making great progress in my Messiah campaign. I have captured the hearts of the local towns-folks and I will be taking a quick visit ti the old folks home over in Cunningham. Thanks for your support.
 
C

CC Dobbs

Well-Known Member
CaretakerDad said:
I will gladly join your cult and neuter myself if you can stop the other Messiah (AKA GhostDriver) from ever posting again. No healing, walking on water, or raising yourself or anyone else from the dead bullshit. Just shut the nutbag up.
Click to expand...
I hear you brother. I am sure that he is a false prophet because when I suggest oral sex he gets real quite. As everybody knows; prophets love oral sex.

So he can't be real.
 
Growan

Growan

Well-Known Member
CC Dobbs said:
Mr 530,

Sir I would like to state for the record that I like cats. I have found cats to seem indifferent sometimes to my feelings though I cannot be absolutely sure of this.

I do on occasion find myself at the center of what can only be called a cat dominated procession. I will be walking down a street somewhere and all of the sudden a cat will show up walking by my side. Soon another joins in until a whole crew of variously colored cats are surrounding me. I've had as many as 50 of those things strolling along with me. This can create quite a traffic hazard. I don't know what is going on but it creeps me out.

I have been making great progress in my Messiah campaign. I have captured the hearts of the local towns-folks and I will be taking a quick visit ti the old folks home over in Cunningham. Thanks for your support.
Click to expand...
download-36.jpg
 
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