There's a fucking squirrel up in the tree..

MrFishy

Well-Known Member
If you capture a wascally squirrel and shave it's chest, they ALL have "I'll be back" tattoo-ed across their pecs. Be careful!
 

South Texas

Well-Known Member
OK then. Serve with rice, gravy & Biscuits. Murderer! LOL. By the way, Squirrel brains is good also. So what's on the menu for tomorrow? Been 'hankering' fer a bite of beef cheek,Goose Liver with scrambled Goose eggs, maybe some hog head cheese with a side of deep fried chicken's feet. Don't forget the Turkey Gizzards!!!
 

Seamaiden

Well-Known Member
Oh... now you're talkin'... except I prefer the livers to the gizzards. 8)

Whatever I end up with will be served with beans & rice + platanos maduros.
 

MrFishy

Well-Known Member
MaMa used to serve us grits n' brains . . . just suck the dura out of the earhole. Pretty tasty!
Here's another yummy recipe. Enjoy!

Critter Bake
Submitted by Anonymous in Alabama
What ya be needin’ :Mess of mices
Small squirrel brain
Green onions
Two cans pork n beans
Some red ants
Handful of lard
Get a good mess of mices and chop all their heads and tails off. Put the tails in a snuff can and bury under medium shade tree. Fro mices in pot with squirrel brain ya should have done put in there but ya weren’t payin’ no attention nohow. Add onions and ants before more ants come and crawl up yer pants and sting yer beehind. Dump in pork n beans and put the flame to it for 1/3 hour. Stir one time when ants are blowed up. Put lard on top and bake till first sign of rain.
 

MrFishy

Well-Known Member
MaMa used to serve us grits n' brains . . . just suck the dura out of the earhole. Pretty tasty! I belive they were sauteed?
Here's another yummy recipe. Enjoy!
:blsmoke:

Critter Bake
Submitted by Anonymous in Alabama
What ya be needin’ :
Mess of mices
Small squirrel brain
Green onions
Two cans pork n beans
Some red ants
Handful of lard
Get a good mess of mices and chop all their heads and tails off. Put the tails in a snuff can and bury under medium shade tree. Fro mices in pot with squirrel brain ya should have done put in there but ya weren’t payin’ no attention nohow. Add onions and ants before more ants come and crawl up yer pants and sting yer beehind. Dump in pork n beans and put the flame to it for 1/3 hour. Stir one time when ants are blowed up. Put lard on top and bake till first sign of rain.
 

South Texas

Well-Known Member
MaMa used to serve us grits n' brains . . . just suck the dura out of the earhole. Pretty tasty!
Here's another yummy recipe. Enjoy!

Critter Bake
Submitted by Anonymous in Alabama
What ya be needin’ :Mess of mices
Small squirrel brain
Green onions
Two cans pork n beans
Some red ants
Handful of lard
Get a good mess of mices and chop all their heads and tails off. Put the tails in a snuff can and bury under medium shade tree. Fro mices in pot with squirrel brain ya should have done put in there but ya weren’t payin’ no attention nohow. Add onions and ants before more ants come and crawl up yer pants and sting yer beehind. Dump in pork n beans and put the flame to it for 1/3 hour. Stir one time when ants are blowed up. Put lard on top and bake till first sign of rain.
Now we're TALKING!!! Fishy stole my heart, made my day. So Grand Paw, What's fer Supper? Sucking the Brain from the ears causes hairy palms. Ain't yore Pappy taught U no learin'? Guess He ain't been properly introduced to no fresh, bumper-slung Possum Grits, with a side of hand-slung Chitt'lins. Nigger be shitt'in in tall cotton, fer sho! By the way, Ants is only good when stuffed in japelones. Now you got the bite.
 

South Texas

Well-Known Member
Yeah, "Fucking vermin". Squirrels are nasty? Pigs are nasty. Chickens are nasty. Unborn embryo's (chicken eggs, dip shit) is nasty. Fuzzies the squirrel isn't nasty. He's a lot cleaner than most of the dead carcass you put on your plate. Other than eating seeds & veggies, He has been on a quest, which some City-folk don't bother to comprehend.
2,000 years ago, Fuzzies ancestries, set down at the bargaining table at the request of the Pine tree. The Pine tree confessed that it wanted to assure promotion of further Life. To have seedlings brought up in the best Sunshine, to have fertile soil at their young feet. However, prior to the babies having that chance, the Monster Squirrels was eating all the Babies. So the parley begin. Should the Squirrel continue to kill the Babies of the Golden Goose, then there will be NOTHING. Both Parties will die. So the agreement was that Fuzzie's Senior would only eat 50% of the Babies, but plant the other 50% outside of where the nut falls. All that shit falling is where Fuzzies is getting the Pine seeds out of the cone, and planting them, as the agreement called for. He deserves better.
 

Code420

Well-Known Member
Yeah, "Fucking vermin". Squirrels are nasty? Pigs are nasty. Chickens are nasty. Unborn embryo's (chicken eggs, dip shit) is nasty. Fuzzies the squirrel isn't nasty. He's a lot cleaner than most of the dead carcass you put on your plate. Other than eating seeds & veggies, He has been on a quest, which some City-folk don't bother to comprehend.
2,000 years ago, Fuzzies ancestries, set down at the bargaining table at the request of the Pine tree. The Pine tree confessed that it wanted to assure promotion of further Life. To have seedlings brought up in the best Sunshine, to have fertile soil at their young feet. However, prior to the babies having that chance, the Monster Squirrels was eating all the Babies. So the parley begin. Should the Squirrel continue to kill the Babies of the Golden Goose, then there will be NOTHING. Both Parties will die. So the agreement was that Fuzzie's Senior would only eat 50% of the Babies, but plant the other 50% outside of where the nut falls. All that shit falling is where Fuzzies is getting the Pine seeds out of the cone, and planting them, as the agreement called for. He deserves better.
By that I'm sure you mean the greedy VERMIN squirrels hides more nuts than it can eat and forgets where some are. Squirrels are worse than rats they chew threw everything, their teeth never stop growing. They will chew on tree branches to sharpen their teeth but cannot tell the difference between a tree branch and a live power line. They also carry plague (sound nasty to me) and cause a lot of power outages. They're just pests that look pretty. Although we decimated and expanded upon their habitat it doesn't mean we should let them decimate our own.
 

Seamaiden

Well-Known Member
How would you dash a rock on its head when it's about 80' up the tree? Not to worry, we bought a pellet gun and have encouraged the squirrel to move elsewhere. :D
 

xmissxaliex

Well-Known Member
hahahha good for you.

oh god i know how you feel.

last year it was so BAD!!!!! jesus, there were like 5 squirells in my tree, and they'd drop, EVERYT?HING!!! like skulls of other animals, and all that shit.

it stank so fucking bad because their nest was of garbage n shit that they'd steal from neighbors houses and it smelled like dead animals.

those little fuckers were so GRIMEY!!! so one day my old neighbor judy (god she was FUNNY) she's like "im SO SICK OF THESE GRIMEY LITTLE FUCKERS! im not sleeping till i shoot every single one in the god damn head!!!!"

and she did.

it was nasty though, i know how you feel hahaha
 

Seamaiden

Well-Known Member
8) Good on Judy. They ARE nasty, aren't they? I have never seen quite as bad as what you described, but I've read of it before. Cool thing is that my husband didn't actually have to shoot the squirrel. It quickly figured out that someone was taking aim, and the next day my father-in-law tells me that he watched the squirrel go down the tree and run up the street. :D
 

xmissxaliex

Well-Known Member
yeah they are nasty. pissin me off, thank god we have like 2 in that tree now totally different. they mind there own god damn business lol
yeah they can be trashy and can even be bold.
we had a white one....sick one with those beady red eyes... it was starin at me once so i opened the door to shoot my dudes bb gun with it and it comes runing up to my door! it was trying to come in or somethng!

i have so much hate for them...
hahaha
 

GarryFroker

New Member
I detest squirrels. They decimate bird populations, and they're dirty. One or more have recently moved into our area (trees on our property). They're not welcome. I must devise a plan. I might move the Jeep, but that won't get rid of the squirrel. Little fucker's still dropping shit all over! :lol: Little fucking squirrel, I hate you.
Trap them like you would a rat. Put a fresh nut on a trap. It works.
 
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