How Are your STOOLS lately?

[bu$hleaguer]

I'm usually like type 4 lately with the occasional type 5. The occasional logger thrown in for fun.

Today though I had what I like to call the Wagner Power Sprayer, and I unintentionally chose "hangover black" as the hue. My other favorite is walnut brown, but today was certainly hangover black.

 

[LetsGetCritical]

I like how they compare it to sausage. Who the fuck compares their shit to sausage?

yeah and how does one know if ones stool (lol) is hard or soft........................
..........

 

[bu$hleaguer]

yeah and how does one know if ones stool (lol) is hard or soft

Your asshole either doesn't need a wipe or it does. Also, your asshole either slams shut or eases itself closed.

I'm a fecal expert. Back in the day in middle school I partook in what I refer to as "fecal terrorism." Fecal terrorism was when I would sneak into my teachers personal bathroom and drop a nasty shit in the toilet without flushing, so when Mr. Smyth returned from his lunch break to take his dump he would be greeted by an Al Queda style bathroom.

 

[Singlemalt]

This was back in '78 and there was a water crisis, so the state of Calif had posters and shit all over college towns about saving water...."Save water, shower together, etc." My gf who later became the wife and I just moved in together. I come home and go to take a whizz and see Type 1 in the toilet. I don't know what the hell it is, it looked like black rabbit turds. I call for her and ask what that is....she turns bright red, embarrassed as hell and won't answer. I figure it out and die laughing, and nicknamed her "the Atomic Furnace"....Atomic for short; she turns anything ingested into elemental carbon. Too this day if I ever call her Atomic, I get a punch in the arm

 

[LetsGetCritical]

Your asshole either doesn't need a wipe or it does. Also, your asshole either slams shut or eases itself closed.

I'm a fecal expert. Back in the day in middle school I partook in what I refer to as "fecal terrorism." Fecal terrorism was when I would sneak into my teachers personal bathroom and drop a nasty shit in the toilet without flushing, so when Mr. Smyth returned from his lunch break to take his dump he would be greeted by an Al Queda style bathroom.

no i just realized how stuopid that sounded lol

 

[tytheguy111]

This was back in '78 and there was a water crisis, so the state of Calif had posters and shit all over college towns about saving water...."Save water, shower together, etc." My gf who later became the wife and I just moved in together. I come home and go to take a whizz and see Type 1 in the toilet. I don't know what the hell it is, it looked like black rabbit turds. I call for her and ask what that is....she turns bright red, embarrassed as hell and won't answer. I figure it out and die laughing, and nicknamed her "the Atomic Furnace"....Atomic for short; she turns anything ingested into elemental carbon. Too this day if I ever call her Atomic, I get a punch in the arm

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

 

[LetsGetCritical]

 

[LetsGetCritical]

that one would have to be semi - soft to get out, nO?

 

[bu$hleaguer]

I need a Love button for this one. That's gotta be like 60 kuriks

 

[Indagrow]

number 4 is actually considered the best, but 3 is really good too, im usually 3-4 mostly because my diet is extremely high in fiber

I know there isn't much more to go... But can you go on? I'm about to head to the I just masturbated thread but am finding I need more detail.

Thanks in advance

 

[Skuxx]

1 and 7 ONLY.

that's not healthy. you want nice fat sausage turds with a good consistency. not too hard and not too mushy. goldilocks and the 3 bears bro

 

[mr mustache]

that's not healthy. you want nice fat sausage turds with a good consistency. not too hard and not too mushy. goldilocks and the 3 bears bro

I eat a lot of yogurt. :/

 

[Unclebaldrick]

Stool boom!
From the parlor to the pool room!

 

[Milovan]

So things are a bit constipated on RIU lately…

Classic. I'm ordering one for all my family and friends for Christmas:

The Bristol Stool Chart:
Discuss…..

.



.

 

[curious2garden]

 

[Hookabelly]

This was back in '78 and there was a water crisis, so the state of Calif had posters and shit all over college towns about saving water...."Save water, shower together, etc." My gf who later became the wife and I just moved in together. I come home and go to take a whizz and see Type 1 in the toilet. I don't know what the hell it is, it looked like black rabbit turds. I call for her and ask what that is....she turns bright red, embarrassed as hell and won't answer. I figure it out and die laughing, and nicknamed her "the Atomic Furnace"....Atomic for short; she turns anything ingested into elemental carbon. Too this day if I ever call her Atomic, I get a punch in the arm

And now for the threadjack:

What's the DEAL with spousal shitting? Those of us that are married, do your wives pretend they don't crap at all? If you walk in are they super embarrassed? or do they just continue to carry on a conversation like in Friday? (skip to :30)

This should be a new poll:

Do you crap in front of you S.O.?

 

[The Outdoorsman]

3-4 I reckon. And if you must know it usually goes something like this.

1-4 cups of coffee. Gets me rumblin. Morning dump.

1-4 beers/ drinks. Gets me relaxed. Evening dump.

and repeat.

 

[Hookabelly]

Your asshole either doesn't need a wipe or it does. Also, your asshole either slams shut or eases itself closed.

I'm a fecal expert. Back in the day in middle school I partook in what I refer to as "fecal terrorism." Fecal terrorism was when I would sneak into my teachers personal bathroom and drop a nasty shit in the toilet without flushing, so when Mr. Smyth returned from his lunch break to take his dump he would be greeted by an Al Queda style bathroom.

So you're def. a S.A.W. type of guy...

 

[bu$hleaguer]

So you're def. a S.A.W. type of guy...

What's that?

 

[Singlemalt]

And now for the threadjack:

What's the DEAL with spousal shitting? Those of us that are married, do your wives pretend they don't crap at all? If you walk in are they super embarrassed? or do they just continue to carry on a conversation like in Friday? (skip to :30)

This should be a new poll:

Do you crap in front of you S.O.?

If she walks in, ya sure. Not gonna stop and ruin the moment; that's my time to ponder the success or failure of yesterday; i.e the validation of yesterday's decisions. We have different routines, so I rarely see her shit.....I get up and make coffee for me and tea for her, and wait for the newspaper. Have a cup or 2, if she isn't up I go to the other shitter. She gets up and immediately goes to the bathroom, brushes teeth then showers.