Are you PROUD of your SEMEN?

[bluntmassa1]

That's rubbish! You need 2 peens and one vagini. This will be the guys fantasy mostly! Unless of course you want the girl too!

Edit: it's nearly a week since I had sex. What do you say to a foursome?

Damn that dudes lucky I bet he don't last 5 minutes with all that beaver.

Fuck the 2 guys 1 girl shit, I could have but no way that's just wrong I ain't the sharing type you have to be half gay for that shit your gonna touch unless it's a really fat bitch.

 

[bu$hleaguer]

Good job roll it up. I'm gone for a weekend and I come back to a thread about jizz that's 8 pages long. Proud of ya'll!

 

[Hookabelly]

@Hookabelly
found this one.
it's destroyed.
still my ex was a hot piece.
View attachment 3436042

Stoopit fucking cancer.

Makes me want to eat a box of crackerjack….I think those uniforms are cool, but a bit outdated now don't you? Do they still have to wear those? Your ex had cancer?

 

[charface]

Makes me want to eat a box of crackerjack….I think those uniforms are cool, but a bit outdated now don't you? Do they still have to wear those? Your ex had cancer?

Yeah she died about 5
Years ago.
We had been divorced by then. Still sucked though.

 

[charface]

[QUOTE="Hookabelly, post: 11658115, member: 839686"Makesle want to eat a box of crackerjack….I think those uniforms are cool, but a bit outdated now don't you? Do they still have to wear those? Your ex had cancer? [/QUOTE]

I was in Safeway and met a dude in a really cool camo uniform from the Navy so i guess shit done changed.

Fucking Camo on a ship?

here is the fucked part of the navy uniform deal.

I had no idea about dungarees until i joined.
turns out the cool dress uniforms are not what what You wear. Most of the time you wore dungarees.

II'll go Google you up a pic.
the square front pockets and all.

 

[charface]

This is what I think of when ya say navy uniform.

Ain't no bitches trying to fuck the dude in this pic.
AND THE SHOES.
just drop me off Here uncle sam, I can fucking walk home.

 

[Yessica...]

That's rubbish! You need 2 peens and one vagini. This will be the guys fantasy mostly! Unless of course you want the girl too!

Edit: it's nearly a week since I had sex. What do you say to a foursome?

I have NO desire to have more than one peen at a time. ZERO desire.

It turned into a topless massage/ cuddle fest. No sex. Which was probably for the best because I was fucking exhausted by the time they got their sexy asses over to me.

Damn, why does my vagina have to be so picky?

 

[charface]

Three ways are great in theory.
Can be great irl too but expecting three people to just get it right and have chemistry
the first time is unrealistic.

usually its a couple and a long time friend because it presents itself.

think long and hard if those relationships important to you.

Of course you know this.

 

[ebgood]

 

[qwizoking]

Ive only had one chick try and rape me


I let her..


When she told me to cum in her. something deep in my nogin cried nooooo... i didnt listen

 

[Yessica...]

@lahadaextranjera

I'm into a foursome. You might have to strictly take your mans anaconda though...
That shit scares me. Hahaha. It's so biiiiiiiig.

 

[doingdishes]

so how do you get to "Nip" status? haha

 

[Yessica...]

so how do you get to "Nip" status? haha

Hmmmmmm

Lets think.

1. Dress up your penis like a wizard, take a picture, and PM it to me.

2. Get a time machine and start talking to me and being nice from the time I started here. Actually if you had a time machine you would automatically get nip status.

3. PM me your peen. With a happy face drawn on the tip, or just normie.

Also If you have some known-person breasts to share - ill take those too.

I'm excited to find out how you choose to "level up".

I'm REALLY hoping for option # 1.

 

[Yessica...]

Depends on where it lands. There's no skill required to produce semen, it's all in the aim and distance.

I recently came on these:

Yes I had to pay for it and she had a weird european or russian accent but damn... yes, I was proud to see my cum on those tits and even a drop on her jawline.

Those are pretty nice.

I guess if you're paying for it - then maybe that's the key to wanting to paint another persons body with your seeeeeeeeeeeed?

 

[Yessica...]

Not sure cause I didn't actually pay her to come on her. Free bonus. I expected a happy ending sure, but when she whispered "do you want to come on them?" it was only the joy of the thought that I was going to unload on those gorgeous tits that enabled me to hold it in any longer. As soon as they were lined up with my rock hard cock I felt my heart beating stronger and stronger, in the top of my dick all the way down to my anus. Obviously once it came... it really came. Hence the few drops on the jawline... I really was aiming for the nipples. Though she giggled which only added to the pride. And yes nipples, as in plural, making a wiper motion while I come helps to fully unload it and it does add to the painting satisfaction. I mean when you're pissing in the snow you make circles and shit too.

Swarth?

 

[Yessica...]

Only in the summer. Or do you mean her? I think she was Polish.

Or do you mean something else?

- Swarth is defined as turf or soil that is covered by grass
- A smaller, yet not any less filling, version of a slice or piece of something eatable
- Swarth is the third studio album by Australian extreme metal band Portal
- to produce sward
- Adjective used to describe any person with a dark complexion

Old member.

I always like to check to make sure.

Just in cases.

 

[Hookabelly]

This is what I think of when ya say navy uniform.

Ain't no bitches trying to fuck the dude in this pic.
AND THE SHOES.
just drop me off Here uncle sam, I can fucking walk home.
View attachment 3436418 View attachment 3436419

That whole post: RFLMAO! You could have rocked that though. I'm pretty sure.

so how do you get to "Nip" status? haha

@Yessica… granted me this most special status. Secret initiation though.

 

[Yessica...]

@Yessica… granted me this most special status. Secret initiation though.

The first rule of fight club is...

 

[tyler.durden]

^^ You rang? I'm so proud of my semen that I cook with it and serve the dishes to family and friends -

Semen is not only nutritious, but it also has a wonderful texture and amazing cooking properties. Like fine wine and cheeses, the taste of semen is complex and dynamic. Semen is inexpensive to produce and is commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants. Despite all of these positive qualities, semen remains neglected as a food. This book hopes to change that. Once you overcome any initial hesitation, you will be surprised to learn how wonderful semen is in the kitchen. Semen is an exciting ingredient that can give every dish you make an interesting twist. If you are a passionate cook and are not afraid to experiment with new ingredients – you will love this cookbook!

This is the ultimate handbook for mixologists looking for ingredients that go beyond exotic fruit juices and rare spirits. Driven by a commitment and passion for the freshly harvested ingredient, Semenology pushes the limits of classic bartending. Semen is often freshly available behind most bar counters and adds a personal touch to any cocktail. The connoisseur will appreciate learning how to mix selected spirits to enhance the delicate flavors of prostate milk. The book provides useful tips that cover every detail of Semenology, from mixing and presentation to harvesting and storage advice.

I haven't tried any myself though. Gross...

 

[Hookabelly]

^^ You rang? I'm so proud of my semen that I cook with it and serve the dishes to family and friends -

Semen is not only nutritious, but it also has a wonderful texture and amazing cooking properties. Like fine wine and cheeses, the taste of semen is complex and dynamic. Semen is inexpensive to produce and is commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants. Despite all of these positive qualities, semen remains neglected as a food. This book hopes to change that. Once you overcome any initial hesitation, you will be surprised to learn how wonderful semen is in the kitchen. Semen is an exciting ingredient that can give every dish you make an interesting twist. If you are a passionate cook and are not afraid to experiment with new ingredients – you will love this cookbook!

This is the ultimate handbook for mixologists looking for ingredients that go beyond exotic fruit juices and rare spirits. Driven by a commitment and passion for the freshly harvested ingredient, Semenology pushes the limits of classic bartending. Semen is often freshly available behind most bar counters and adds a personal touch to any cocktail. The connoisseur will appreciate learning how to mix selected spirits to enhance the delicate flavors of prostate milk. The book provides useful tips that cover every detail of Semenology, from mixing and presentation to harvesting and storage advice.

I haven't tried any myself though. Gross...

NO fucking way! That can't be real. But I have a sick feeling it is. I love the flan. What did they do for the topping? Carmelize a shower turd?