Sorry to hear.
The mind and the way it works can be a formidable opponent. It's easier said than done
@abe supercro .
@4am sessions , abe is right though. As I said, I have anxiety and self checking can and does help. The key is to find what causes the anxiety and work on that. Like social anxiety. I don't have that, but is it the social anxiety (probably not) or is it the dynamics of the socializing as abe eluded to with thinking people are analyzing and judging you etc... A huge help in this regard is not caring about those things. That does come from confidence. Knowing that if people don't accept you as you are then fuck em and move on. No one needs people like that in their lives to begin with. I don't know your exact issues, but believe me, these things help.
Imagine how crippling it could be if one were to care what they thought everyone thought about them, and then tried to live to please all of those people based upon what they think those people think of them whether they say it or not. It would be like a prison. I used to be somewhat like that because of the way I was raised. But I learned that I had to live for myself instead of others. That doesn't mean I don't care about some people and what some people think, it just means I only care what the people that care about me think sometimes.
Have you told your mother that cannabis helps with your social anxiety? Maybe that would help her accept it. Or have a discussion about the liver destroying alternatives like pills and alcohol. And believe me alcohol works for anxiety. I relied too heavily on THAT medicine for awhile. While I still drink, it is vastly less, and I take no meds for anxiety. It is a lot of self checking like abe suggested. As I said, the mind is a tough opponent and is my worst enemy at times. But it's an opponent you can beat, you just have to train for that fight so to speak.
