Good lord Ernie, you've went through a lot with this. Now I'm not saying that you're a bad guy... yes you made some mistakes that provoked this chain of events, but if the state ddin't wanna give you the change to clean up your act and/or jsut temp take your kids away, then I agree with you... that's THEIR problem after that. When the kdis were legally adopted to another family then it should be the new family to support the children, not you. I didn't read every page in here cause my back is killing me, but your last post suggests that this matter is straightened out. I'm glad if it really is.
As for the statements being made saying that men ALWAYS get screwed by the women... that's bullshit. I will agree that SOME women us the kids as an excuse to get money for other things than their kids. But not all women are piss poor mothers like that. I've been fighting with the system for 3 years. Now I'm fighting the system to NOT get money!! Me and my ex decided we wanted a family and all, I ended up pregnant with our daughter and he then decided (when I was 4 months pregnant) that he'd rather treat me like shit, cheat on me, and that he didn't wanna be a father any more. Well, I'm sorry... I don't believe in abortion and I think at 4 months it was a lil too late anyways. There was no way in hell I'd have my daughter and put her up for adoption either. So I just told my ex to just not worry about it. Now I was a first time mother and I had problems in the pregnancy that prevented me to work. So I went and got on welfare. I didn't know by doing this that I'd then have to sue my ex for child support. As I said, this was all a first for me. So after a few months of getting medical help and such from the state, they come to me to sign papers on suing my ex for child support. I told them I didn't want to and they said that if I didn't, then they would cut my help and I'd have to pay back on the help I already got. Now if I could do that, then why would I even need them for help to start with. >.>' My ex won't work... he's worthless, he told me that he will never work cause working wasn't for him. He must love living off his family. So they keep trying to find him (he keeps moving around so he don't have to deal with child support issues) and he moves from family member to family member ever few months or he'll find a female that he'll date, just to use her as long as he can. So I'm left to deal with the child support people, I still have to go to court dates, I still have to deal with all this bullshit!! I want nothing from him. I just want him to take the damn paternity test, sign over his rights, and let my ex husband adopt her as his daughter. It's clear my ex wants nothing to do with her and my ex husband has been a father to my child for the last 3 years. I know if he does come in to court and do what I'd like him to do... then he could possibly go to jail cause he does owe money from the last 3 years.. but that's cause HE's the one that ran and all... if he would have just signed over rights when she was born (I asked him to come to the hospital the day she was born to do so and he never showed up)... then he'd have no worries right now.
Might I add that at one point in time, he had all the money to pay things off up to date from a settlement after his dad died and he passed that money out to his friends and wasted it on things that he don't even have now. >.>'
Ok, who point of this is to show that not ALL women want money from men and not ALL men get screwed when it comes to child support. Mind you, even though I didn't want money from him... even if he never paid, I'd still let him spend time with his child too... all I ever wanted was him to be in her life a lil here and there so my child didn't feel like something was wrong with her.