OK, first question is -- how hot is she? Post pics please. It does make a difference. Also, does she put out regularly? BJs on command?
Like others have said, if she's making ultimatums now, it will only get worse.
I would give her the boot, but you need to do it carefully. I would suggest that you tell her that you stop growing for like a month, then have the "I think we should see other people" talk or whatever, and let her dump you. Then wait another month and start the grow back up again. It's the safest plan.
Otherwise, if you wanna keep her for whatever reason, just figure out how to deal with the smell. Everyone else is able to figure it out, you can too.
My wife was a little skeptical when I wanted to start growing, but I assured her that I would deal with the smell properly. I made sure and spent the money on proper masking, and there is no smell as promised. Now my wife is stoked to smoke as much as she wants whenever she wants. This week she even agreed to let me expand my grow area. BTW, she's still hot for 38 years old. Unfortunately she doesn't give BJs on command anymore, but I'm working on it. I think I'll keep her for a while longer..