Who THE FUCK can't swim?!

2xcharming

2xcharming

Active Member
I can't swim. Marine Corp tried it's best to teach me but it was me and the overly buff black guys on the bottom of the pool. I could not float. I just sank like a fucking rock. I am very comfortable in water. Hell I love it! I learned to scuba dive. Even in salt water and a wet suit I still sank. I never had to use weights. Always straight to the bottom. The swimming instructor told me that it had to do with body fat content. Said to float you need to weigh less than the amount of water you displace. People who have extremely low body fat can not float. I'm 5 foot nine, at the time, weighed 118 with less than 5% body fat. I was a marathon runner. I was a skinny rail and solid as a rock, which is why I sank like one. Now I am 40 pounds heavier and bob around the pool like a cork. My husand says that it has to do with my JayLo ass. Bastard. LOL!!!
 
S

silasraven

Well-Known Member
umm im starting to think this is a reference to sex. yes i can swim in water not sure what it means when it comes to sex ive only heard the term once.
 
Shannon Alexander

Shannon Alexander

Well-Known Member
2xcharming said:
I can't swim. Marine Corp tried it's best to teach me but it was me and the overly buff black guys on the bottom of the pool. I could not float. I just sank like a fucking rock. I am very comfortable in water. Hell I love it! I learned to scuba dive. Even in salt water and a wet suit I still sank. I never had to use weights. Always straight to the bottom. The swimming instructor told me that it had to do with body fat content. Said to float you need to weigh less than the amount of water you displace. People who have extremely low body fat can not float. I'm 5 foot nine, at the time, weighed 118 with less than 5% body fat. I was a marathon runner. I was a skinny rail and solid as a rock, which is why I sank like one. Now I am 40 pounds heavier and bob around the pool like a cork. My husand says that it has to do with my JayLo ass. Bastard. LOL!!!
Click to expand...
I'm about 25 kilos over weight and I don't naturally float... Even one time in highschool some friends and I went to the pool... and not being a swimmer but with my mates I jumped in and then held my breath as I walked along the bottom of the pool to the side before struggling to get myself to the top of the water then hauled myself out of the pool...
 
scroglodyte

scroglodyte

Well-Known Member
2xcharming said:
I can't swim. Marine Corp tried it's best to teach me but it was me and the overly buff black guys on the bottom of the pool. I could not float. I just sank like a fucking rock. I am very comfortable in water. Hell I love it! I learned to scuba dive. Even in salt water and a wet suit I still sank. I never had to use weights. Always straight to the bottom. The swimming instructor told me that it had to do with body fat content. Said to float you need to weigh less than the amount of water you displace. People who have extremely low body fat can not float. I'm 5 foot nine, at the time, weighed 118 with less than 5% body fat. I was a marathon runner. I was a skinny rail and solid as a rock, which is why I sank like one. Now I am 40 pounds heavier and bob around the pool like a cork. My husand says that it has to do with my JayLo ass. Bastard. LOL!!!
Click to expand...
that's heavy..........
 
2xcharming

2xcharming

Active Member
Running can save your life too. I might not be the fastest anymore but if a zombie is chasing us, I just got to out run you!
 
carl.burnette

carl.burnette

Well-Known Member
Apparently its more common that you think. I just listened to a radio program & they were talking about this.

In many countries swimming is considered playing & also in many parts of the world drowning is considered an act of the gods type thing. We in the Western Hemisphere learn to swim as kids & what not, but not so much elsewhere in the world.

Actually my brother drowned. He was 21 & didn't know how to swim very well. Im a fish myself, love to swim & so do all our kids.

Padawanbater2 said:
I've thought this was the weirdest shit ever since I was a kid, who THE FUCK can' swim?!

You live on a planet with 75% water, why THE FUCK haven't you learned to swim yet?!

Your ass has no excuse.

Tell me why you haven't learned to swim yet?! I find it inconceivable! Whhhhhyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!?!
Click to expand...
 
M

meechz 024

Active Member
Swimming is the easiest fucking thing to learn.

I didn't know what to do, so I just got on my backside using my head to float and did the stroking motion with my arms.

I eventually just flipped back onto my stomach, doing everything else the same and I was swimming, just like that.

I honestly don't understand how some healthy people can't learn how to swim.
 
cannabineer

cannabineer

Ursus marijanus
meechz 024 said:
Swimming is the easiest fucking thing to learn.

I didn't know what to do, so I just got on my backside using my head to float and did the stroking motion with my arms.

I eventually just flipped back onto my stomach, doing everything else the same and I was swimming, just like that.

I honestly don't understand how some healthy people can't learn how to swim.
Click to expand...
I don't think you're supposed to use your head to float. cn
 
M

meechz 024

Active Member
cannabineer said:
I don't think you're supposed to use your head to float. cn
Click to expand...
it's for beginners starting out. instructors start you out by having you go on your back and use your head to float so you can practice your arm and leg motions in a more comfortable manner. didn't feel like explaining that in the previous post, figured anyone who ever learned how to swim knows what im saying.
 
TheChosen

TheChosen

Well-Known Member


sorry couldn't help myself.

Yea when you learn to float usually your legs sink at first leaving you to essentially float on your head.

People not knowing how to swim helps nature weed out the morons who live on a planet that's 71% occupied by water.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top