Ultimate Freak-the-fuck-out of Freak Outs. (Winter Woman please don't read this)

TheChosen

TheChosen

Well-Known Member
[video=youtube;vcTkYs8Ujbk]http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=vcTkYs8Ujbk[/video]


touche
 
cannabineer

cannabineer

Ursus marijanus
So I go to the garage and want to do a load of laundry, but there is a crackling web all around the machine. This guy charged my toe (I was barefoot) but didn't connect. After the pic, I killed it. It had quite the hourglass. I am usually loath to kill spiders, but the black widows must die. cn

camdump 12oct01 002.jpg
 
I

imchucky666

Well-Known Member
Carne Seca said:
Last night after taking my nephew home I made some Gem Chili Soup. The air was crisp and cool so I felt a nice warm soup would be nice. I had all the ingredients and used my favorite knife for the prep work. It's a heavy blade much like a butcher's blade. It took me about an hour to prep and cook the food and then I cleaned up the kitchen, washed the dishes and placed the blade back in it's slot and went to bed.

I decided to make enchiladas from the chili soup this morning. I needed to chop some onions and grate cheese. I was having soft boiled eggs on top so I started with that and then grated the cheese. I had the chili heating on the stove. I pulled out the chopping block and grabbed the knife I used last night. When I was walking over to chopping block, holding the knife, I felt something squirming under my hand. I turned the knife over I noticed a white sac was attached to the handle of the blade. That was sitting in the palm of my hand. I took me couple of seconds before I realized what it was. A spider egg sac. And then it exploded.

Baby spiders went everywhere. Thousands of them. Crawling up and down my arm, over my chest and on my face. ON MY FACE!!!! Without thinking I threw the knife and ran. Stripping off clothes as I went. By the time I hit the bathroom door I was stark naked and screaming, OH MY GOD!!!! OHHHHH MYYY GOOOOOODDD!!!! I scrubbed myself raw. I washed and rinsed so may times that the hot water heater ran out of hot water. Picture me curled up in a ball on the shower stall floor rocking back and forth saying, "I'm in a happy place. I'm in a happy place.."

When I finally composed myself I went into my bedroom for new clothes. I checked them thoroughly for spiders. That's when I smelled something burning. I ran into the kitchen just in time to see an egg explode and cover the wall with embryo shrapnel. Fuck! I took the eggs off the burner. The smell was horrible. I grabbed the bug spray and began spraying every surface I possibly could and my clothes. I took the clothes outside and hosed them off. They're in the washer right now. I spent a good hour and a half cleaning and scrubbing the kitchen.

That's when I realized that I hadn't run across the knife I had thrown. I just scrubbed everything down and didn't remember seeing it. I started thinking about what direction it flew when I lost my shit. Toward the stove. I had to clean the stovetop because of the egg explosion and realized that there was a huge amount of chili splatter as well.

I knew where the knife was then.

I looked inside the chili pot and there it was. A small part of the handle still sticking out of the soup. With baby spiders all over it and floating in the soup.

This is how my Monday started.
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WOW, kinda makes Hormel sound not so bad............
 
Medical420MI

Medical420MI

Well-Known Member
I am so glad I wasn't reading this five minutes ago when I was eating dinner. That's the worst spider story I ever heard. Makes my skin crawl.
 
greenswag

greenswag

Well-Known Member
I used to not mind spiders, until one day I'm out on the boat in the lake and the cushion/flotation device I had, had an egg sack inside of it. Thousands of tiny spiders started crawling all over me and I was like "F*** THIS!" and jumped out of the boat and into the lake. Now I hate spiders with a passion. Thinking about it makes me feel it all over and now I need to get get a shower -.-

Oh and I know exactly how you feel where shit happens. That's actually become my phrase of choice after an incident where my kick ass dad happened to stumble upon me and a female friend. He said "shit happens" and then asked if she wanted to stay for (get this) chili, lol. But I must have amazing karma because even though stupid crap happens to me a lot, things always seem to work out just right.
 
lokie

lokie

Well-Known Member
Carne Seca said:
spiders all over it and floating in the soup.

This is how my Monday started.
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i wont lol, I'm sure that was more than horrifying for you.

What about the chilli? does the added protein enhance the taste.
Does the texture change much with the added ingredients?
do you have to chew it more?

  • :o
 
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