Chronikool
Well-Known Member
Martian Relic Starfleet Complexidon
Introduction:
Welcome to your journey to find the Martian Relic Starfleet Complexidon©. This is a light with a difference and one that is not likely to be copied by those companies due to its amazing qualities of which are listed below.
Features:
Rugged Design
Precision Engineering
Top quality Electronics
Superior cooling abilities
Tantalizing good looks
Research:
The only LED company to actually travel to Mars with the sole intention of building a plant based LED (Light Engineered Diodeitron©) light to present to the world.
Other companies claim to have worked with NASA on various projects, where as Martian Relic actually built our own custom rocket ship and traveled to the red planet. Gaining a certification of approval from the International foundation fund for off-planet research grants on things©(IFFFORGOT©) We were able to fund our research field trips through various underground organizations in causing revolts in several third world countries.
After spending countless money (our accountant died during the making of the Complexidon©, so nobody counted it. RIP Marto) Martian Relic found the true form of light measurement was actually called a Gagortroll© (gTԒ
unit. Our Light measurement department (LMD) discovered that a Gagortroll© is actually a living microbe darkness consumer eater that breeds rapidly when prompted by electricity aka you turning on the Complexidon©. The Gagortroll© expand (eat darkness) to what you see as a beam of light and then contract again into the panel as the light is turned off. The LMD also found that the darkness particles were decaying The Complexidon© outputs an unprecedented 250,000 gTԒ. The highest Gagortroll© reading by a LED panel ever! Guaranteed!
Incorporated Technology:
Hyper Crystal Mega Diodeitrons© The Diodeitron is the home of the Gagortroll© It is made out of Mars Hyper Crystal which is 100% extracted from the red planet and plundered back to earth. Our research shows this is the most stable substrate to house the Gagortroll© and all their wild light parties.
GammaPlast Flexi-Rotors© This special substance is chemically formulated and put into moulds to allow ease of air movement around its flanks and provide flight at the right time for your situation. (To be assembled).(Note: 2nd photo taken in space, hence sideways soil)
Triple Enforced Ultra Terrestrial Plate Skin© On the red planet Our Marstronaut© explorers found this amazing substance and it was developed in our foundry. Martian Relic first enforces the liquid fiber by using their patented Enforcifying© techniques. Next, they repeat this procedure to Re-enforcify© And lastly, the step is finalized to Re-re-enforcify© the fiber to give it the hardened look of the industry game changer.
The only LED panel to incorporate Relic terra-firmas© which work to ensure the Complexidon© always makes a safe landing. Engineers have also skillfully incorporated a ray of LEDs to the Relic Terra-firmas©
Warranty:
Martian Relic is so confident that the Complexidon© will not fly, glide, jog, walk, run, swim, paddle or leave your location for the red planet (its homeland), we have offered a double lifetime guarantee, so you can buy in confidence!
Purchase:
Because of the interest in this Complexidon© please email us at [email protected] to check availability.
FAQ and factual statements:
Its ugly as fuck! I would rather watch my best friend castrate himself with a rusty spoon then look at that - John Simpsoninsonsong, Satanic sacrifice worshiper
Martian Relics response: This is why the Complexidon© is also good for your health. Because of its unique design, Lucky buyers will NOT want to look at it, therefore improving eye health.
I opened the OVERSIZE parcel and couldnt stop laughing, I mean what the fuck am I going to do with this monstrosity of a joke? Barry, Compulsive online shopper
Martian Relics response: Another clever piece of engineering and psychological research on our companys part. Laughter is known to release endorphins, meaning that you will enjoy your Complexidon even more then conventional LED panels.
It looks like it was engineered by a 6 year old Dargoson, aged 7
Martian Relics response: The magic of the Complexidon is the simplicity of how it operates and the barebones approach that Martian Relic have incorporated into this space age marvel.
What is the HPS equivalent? Bow Peep, Sheep follower
Martian Relics response: We are so sure that there is no HPS (or any other light for that matter) equivalent that we didnt run any tests or side by sides. This shows confidence in our product
Your company seems shifty, where do you operate from? Greg Philip Savile, Geocaching Master
Martian Relics response: In fact we do move around a lot, we operate out of our space craft which takes daily trips around mars and back
We trust you will make the right choice for your plants, remember that This technology came from Mars, so it must be good, Right?©
Introduction:
Welcome to your journey to find the Martian Relic Starfleet Complexidon©. This is a light with a difference and one that is not likely to be copied by those companies due to its amazing qualities of which are listed below.
Features:
Rugged Design
Precision Engineering
Top quality Electronics
Superior cooling abilities
Tantalizing good looks
Research:
The only LED company to actually travel to Mars with the sole intention of building a plant based LED (Light Engineered Diodeitron©) light to present to the world.
Other companies claim to have worked with NASA on various projects, where as Martian Relic actually built our own custom rocket ship and traveled to the red planet. Gaining a certification of approval from the International foundation fund for off-planet research grants on things©(IFFFORGOT©) We were able to fund our research field trips through various underground organizations in causing revolts in several third world countries.
After spending countless money (our accountant died during the making of the Complexidon©, so nobody counted it. RIP Marto) Martian Relic found the true form of light measurement was actually called a Gagortroll© (gTԒ
unit. Our Light measurement department (LMD) discovered that a Gagortroll© is actually a living microbe darkness consumer eater that breeds rapidly when prompted by electricity aka you turning on the Complexidon©. The Gagortroll© expand (eat darkness) to what you see as a beam of light and then contract again into the panel as the light is turned off. The LMD also found that the darkness particles were decaying The Complexidon© outputs an unprecedented 250,000 gTԒ. The highest Gagortroll© reading by a LED panel ever! Guaranteed! Incorporated Technology:
Hyper Crystal Mega Diodeitrons© The Diodeitron is the home of the Gagortroll© It is made out of Mars Hyper Crystal which is 100% extracted from the red planet and plundered back to earth. Our research shows this is the most stable substrate to house the Gagortroll© and all their wild light parties.
GammaPlast Flexi-Rotors© This special substance is chemically formulated and put into moulds to allow ease of air movement around its flanks and provide flight at the right time for your situation. (To be assembled).(Note: 2nd photo taken in space, hence sideways soil)
Triple Enforced Ultra Terrestrial Plate Skin© On the red planet Our Marstronaut© explorers found this amazing substance and it was developed in our foundry. Martian Relic first enforces the liquid fiber by using their patented Enforcifying© techniques. Next, they repeat this procedure to Re-enforcify© And lastly, the step is finalized to Re-re-enforcify© the fiber to give it the hardened look of the industry game changer.
The only LED panel to incorporate Relic terra-firmas© which work to ensure the Complexidon© always makes a safe landing. Engineers have also skillfully incorporated a ray of LEDs to the Relic Terra-firmas©
Warranty:
Martian Relic is so confident that the Complexidon© will not fly, glide, jog, walk, run, swim, paddle or leave your location for the red planet (its homeland), we have offered a double lifetime guarantee, so you can buy in confidence!
Purchase:
Because of the interest in this Complexidon© please email us at [email protected] to check availability.
FAQ and factual statements:
Its ugly as fuck! I would rather watch my best friend castrate himself with a rusty spoon then look at that - John Simpsoninsonsong, Satanic sacrifice worshiper
Martian Relics response: This is why the Complexidon© is also good for your health. Because of its unique design, Lucky buyers will NOT want to look at it, therefore improving eye health.
I opened the OVERSIZE parcel and couldnt stop laughing, I mean what the fuck am I going to do with this monstrosity of a joke? Barry, Compulsive online shopper
Martian Relics response: Another clever piece of engineering and psychological research on our companys part. Laughter is known to release endorphins, meaning that you will enjoy your Complexidon even more then conventional LED panels.
It looks like it was engineered by a 6 year old Dargoson, aged 7
Martian Relics response: The magic of the Complexidon is the simplicity of how it operates and the barebones approach that Martian Relic have incorporated into this space age marvel.
What is the HPS equivalent? Bow Peep, Sheep follower
Martian Relics response: We are so sure that there is no HPS (or any other light for that matter) equivalent that we didnt run any tests or side by sides. This shows confidence in our product
Your company seems shifty, where do you operate from? Greg Philip Savile, Geocaching Master
Martian Relics response: In fact we do move around a lot, we operate out of our space craft which takes daily trips around mars and back
We trust you will make the right choice for your plants, remember that This technology came from Mars, so it must be good, Right?©
