Pinworm's 600w RDWC Horrorshow (WWxBB Mainlined - NL5xHaze, Purple Fire, Sour Diesel)

[video=youtube;fdXLOkzfsRM]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fdXLOkzfsRM[/video]


So, she died without her son. I heard about it drunk after a show. I got up at her wake and said...I love my mom, I wish I knew her better.....

She had dementia. She had 3 days left, and I told her no....I won't come down.. No, I won't be there for you.....I feel so bad, now...I'm so choked up.
 
[video=youtube;R0JOlq5htJA]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R0JOlq5htJA&list=PL953FCACEE2D5A18B[/video]

Celebrate our disarray, with co-dependence day....
 
Pinworm said:
[video=youtube;fdXLOkzfsRM]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fdXLOkzfsRM[/video]


So, she died without her son. I heard about it drunk after a show. I got up at her wake and said...I love my mom, I wish I knew her better.....

She had dementia. She had 3 days left, and I told her no....I won't come down.. No, I won't be there for you.....I feel so bad, now...I'm so choked up.
Click to expand...

You know, Pin -- this is the way of the world. With every friend or family member, there are things we say at the time because for whatever reason it's right at the time. And when we lose that person we think back to those moments and second guess our decisions. Why did we say that? And why did we say that THAT way? Why were we cruel, or cold, or self-absorbed, or thoughtless...

But the truth is what you said at the time was right at the time. Of course had you known what would happen you would have said something different. But no one ever knows. No one. Ever. Grappling with this is part of the pain that goes along with the loss. Death brings a final moment to an argument that was supposed to be on-going. But it does not make you a bad person, or a selfish one. Before such a loss, we're very aware of the ways the other person disappointed us. And after the loss, all we can think about is the ways we disappointed them. Neither is the full story.

Don't be hard on yourself. It's obvious from the way you conduct yourself in this thread that you're a good man. And you must have gotten some of that from her, even if your relationship with her at times was rocky. You can still honor her by remembering what was best about her, and fostering the parts in you that are similar.

Wishing you a clear path through your grief,
KG
 
Pinworm said:
So, she died without her son. I heard about it drunk after a show. I got up at her wake and said...I love my mom, I wish I knew her better.....

She had dementia. She had 3 days left, and I told her no....I won't come down.. No, I won't be there for you.....I feel so bad, now...I'm so choked up.
Click to expand...

Sometimes we make really bad decisions we can never get back. I had a son born too early to survive. I chose for us not to see him. I never laid eyes on my fucking son. Not getting that one back. The only comfort I can take is that I made what I thought was the fitting thing to do at the time. It doesn't comfort me much. I suppose I will see him one day, and I have pictures a nurse took. Part of me died with him, I killed another part of me with that decision.

When emotions are running high our minds aren't what they are from the vantage point of a calm future.

Not sure the point, I guess just to commiserate the misery. Just know you are not alone.
 
I totally appreciate all the love and support. You guys sure know how to make a guy feel better ( i mean that ). I just wanted to apologize for all the sad, drunken posts with shitty music from the last couple weeks. I'm a total bummer sometimes. Promise to keep morale up, and think super happy fun times would be appropriate from now on. Hoping everyone is having a gnarly holiday season. I'll do my best to update here real soon (my camera is being stupid).
 
It's no problem PW, everyone has their own ways of processing. I'm glad your getting back rockin' and rollin'.

I defiantly miss your updates too man, we need to see how that mainlining is going :-)
 
AllDayToker said:
It's no problem PW, everyone has their own ways of processing. I'm glad your getting back rockin' and rollin'.

I defiantly miss your updates too man, we need to see how that mainlining is going :-)
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Thanks, ADT. Appreciate that mang. I may be able to treat ya this evening. I'll use my phone cam if I have to. You'll be stoked, bro. The flip started a week ago, and everyone is looking fucking awesome. I tortured them reeeeeal good.
 
Pinworm said:
Thanks, ADT. Appreciate that mang. I may be able to treat ya this evening. I'll use my phone cam if I have to. You'll be stoked, bro. The flip started a week ago, and everyone is looking fucking awesome. I tortured them reeeeeal good.
Click to expand...

Most girls won't admit it but they love to be choked and tied up... Wait, what are we talking about again?


1296191926124_7484437.png
 
Apraksiya92 said:
Всем привет, сижу одна на работе в ночь. Народу нет, а работать еще целых 6 часов. Как можно убить время? Пробовала поиграть в игрушку, но у меня тут интернет дурацкий и долго открывает. Работаю я кассиром-оператором на АЗС, без людей ночью совсем скучно, вот я и думаю может есть еще кто то, кто тоже не спит и готов пообщатся на разные интересные темы?
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[video=youtube;NrLI-5xYybo]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NrLI-5xYybo[/video]

Da, comrade! Up the proletariat! Down with the bourgeoisie! FREE PUSSY RIOT!
 

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