I started playing drums in music class and played them through marching band. Took lessons from this dude names Larry Ochiltree, pretty famous dude, along the likes of Neil Pert.. Had a nice 5 piece kit and when I was 16 they were stolen.. Then I switched to guitar and never looked back.. I can still play a mean beat though.
You know the the only thing you'll never hear a drummer say ever right? "Hey guys, lets play the song I wrote!"
If you mean by "song I wrote" to mean writing all of the parts of the song, well of course not.
But I have to admit it's rare for a drummer to be the writer, or co-writer, but definitely not unheard of.
Tito Puente is one who comes to mind, Neil Peart, Gil Moore, Don Henley, Ringo Starr, Dave Grohl, Mike Portnoy, and the list goes on.
While they might not write any of the melodes or basslines, most guitarists/writers and bassist/writers don't write the drummer's parts either.
Often the most you'll get is some bad air drums while they try (and fail) to explain what they think would be cool to go with the melody & bass lines: "And in this part how about some dugga-dugga-dugga with the kicks and some kind of snare work, and then run down the toms with a "budda-budda-budda-budda-budda-budda" with a crash at the end of it. Just a cool fill, you know?"
Almost everyone can "scat" out a guitar riff and make sense of it so that a good guitarist can replicate it, but so few can do more than give the most basic approximation of the drummers part because of the sheer speed and complexity of the notes & tonal ranges being played in succession.
Every musician in a group has their strong points, but writing/composing/arranging isn't mutually exclusive to one instrument.
While funny (up to a point. Much like "Blond" jokes: after a few of those they all start sounding more like "Dead Baby" jokes, and it just stops being funny & cute), stuff like:
1. How do you get a guitarist to change chords?
How?
You smack the bottom of his guitar
2. How do you know when a drummer is knocking on your door?
Idk?
When the knocks start slowing down
3. Why don't you let the drummer count off?
Why?
You want to get paid tonight?
4. How do you know when your singer is at your door?
Idk?
They can't find the key, and they don't know when to come in
5. How do you get a guitarist to stop playing?
How?
Put some sheet music in front of them
6. How many bassists does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They depend on the keyboardist to do it with his left hand.
OR
One but the guitarist has to show him first.
It's all about as funny as a leper in a sandpaper factory.
But that's just me.
I'm more into "sly" puns & plays on words, rather than making like Don Rickles and trying to tear someone down.
Though I am good at the Don Rickles thing.
When you're in charge of 20 to 40 Pvt's, Corporals and Specialists, sometimes you have to drop the hammer, and you better have an unending string of "motivational" phrases and "poignant" questions to get their heads and asses wired together.
But that's only because lives are on the line.
I had to water it down in civilian life, because they're what most would call "fightin' words".
I even have my wife repeating some of my stuff when she's getting upset.
One of my favorites, which is one of my final, and subtle, warnings to someone who isn't performing is, "Alright: no fucking around now. Let's get this shit done, and get it done right."
Which is cute, coming from her, as she's all of 4'11" tall.
My final warning is a very calm: "You're starting to piss me off.", while forcing direct eye contact.
From there, it's all down hill for them if they don't get their shit together.
After that, I go into Drill Sergeant Mode until they comply, breakdown, or take an unfortunate swing at me.
Those were the days...
Thank FSM they're behind me.